Baby not engaged. Please tell me your positive stories

[Greenerygarden]

Saw my midwife this morning, I’m 40 weeks today with my first baby. She said my baby girl is quite large and not fully engaged.
My Midwife also said I would definitely need a c section because it was really unlikely that the baby would engage now. I asked if there was anything I could do to encourage it and she said no.
She also said it’s a bad sign that I’m not having false Labour at this point, I dont even get braxton hicks so she thinks that means my body is no where near ready to give birth.

I’ve been using the birthing ball for hours a day and walking every day.
I’ve also used spinning babies.
Can I have any positive stories from first babies who engaged late, to give me some hope or any tips to get her to engage?

Bumping for you OP

I saw my midwife at 37 weeks with DS1, baby engaged but went for a scan at 39 weeks and was not engaged as had gone back up. Came at 40+2, 8 hours after first contraction.

DS2 measuring large but fine on growth scans, not engaged when I saw my midwife but came at 40 weeks exactly, 8.5 hours after first contraction and in time for me to phone and cancel my planned stretch and sweep!

Sounds a bit off to me. I never had Braxton hicks. Not sure when my babies fully engaged. Went to nearly 42 weeks first time and 41 the second.

Do you always see the same midwife? Another one might say something different.

@TinkerTiger thank you

@tealandteal did you feel the baby engage at any point between the appointment and Labour starting? or did you do anything to encourage Labour or engagement?

@haveatye thank you, she said Labour for a first typically stops and starts, so she’d expect a few nights of cramps, back pain or contractions and also braxton hicks before I go into Labour. Since I haven’t had that and she’s not engaged she thinks it won’t happen. A week ago I thought Labour was starting but I’ve have nothing at all since, not even a twinge of back pain.
it’s always the same midwife yeah

My first wasn't engaged when labour started and wasn't even engaged in full labour. Her head went down very suddenly. I felt it and she was born a few pushes later. My second was engaged for two weeks before birth. It was like walking with a football between my legs. I got to 5cm with no contractions. Both were two hour labours. I don't think that having the head fully engaged makes much difference. I did to my births.

I'd take it all with a pinch of salt tbh.
My labour didn't stop & start. No false alarms either.

One thing I would say is that from a safety point of view, please, please go straight to the hospital if you think labour is starting.
My baby wasn't engaged and got in awful distress. Fortunately I'd had gone straight to hospital.
Second baby didn't engage either but he was transverse/unstable lie which was a pain as I had to stay in hospital for the last few weeks of pregnancy.

She doesn't sound like a very good midwife. I never had Brixton hicks with any of my three. I also wasn't fully engaged until labour.

I've had multiple "failed" sweeps whilst overdue and gone into labour shortly after.

Don't lose faith. You will go into labour naturally. Whether you want to wait for that to happen is entirely up to you.

Have a go at the Miles Circuit. My MW recommended it to me at 40 weeks and I did it twice for 15 minutes for each section and went into labour naturally. Also lots of ball bouncing and curb walking.

Thank you. I’m a bit worried about leaving it later when there is a jnr dr strike next week, and worried about the large baby getting larger and the risk of emergency c section anyway, especially if she never engages. I’m just hoping she drops into position but these stories have been really reassuring

Thank you I’ve not heard of the miles circuit I will have a look

I never had any Braxton Hicks and I don't remember being told whether either of my babies were engaged or not. I had one failed induction ending in a C-section and one vaginal birth.

My friend went all the way to 42 weeks before agreeing to be induced. She had a perfectly fine (if a little slow) birth with the drip and an epidural.

With my third baby they wanted to induce me before 40 weeks because my bump suddenly started measuring off the scale and a scan had baby measuring on 93rd percentile. He was born naturally with no tearing at 40 + 3 weighing 9lb.

It sounds ridiculous now but I remember a friend that was pregnant & due a similar time to me making me feel inadequate because her baby was head down & engaged from quite an early stage. My DD on the other hand was lying transverse, then breech & not engaged at all! As it happens I think DD engaged quite late- I went in to labour at 40 + 5 & had a natural birth. My friend actually needed to be induced as she went up to almost 42 weeks. So you never know in terms of when they engage & what it means. Don’t despair!

Labour with my first didn't stop and start nothing happened til 40+3

How are you getting on OP? With my first I did spinning babies, waking with one foot on the kerb etc but with my second I had a 5 year old and was exhausted so just did the school run and laid down the rest of the day! With DS2 he changed positions while I was in labour, you could see the bump was very much to one side and they said not to push as he wasn’t in the right place, he then moved more to the middle and only about 3 minutes of active pushing he came out. I didn’t have Brixton hicks with DC2 but I did with DC1.

Neither of my two were engaged at 40 weeks, but I went into labour with both and didn't have a c section. When they did engage I knew nothing about it, so you might not feel when this happens. The advice around engagement is that it NORMALLY happens by 39 weeks, but don't forget that your baby doesn't have a watch in there, so isn't aware that they're doing anything "late" and also dating scans can be out by a bit too. Just as babies outside the womb develop in their own time, the same is often true of babies before they're born too. Also, unless your midwife has a crystal ball she has no idea that your baby wasn't going to become engaged as soon as she stopped palpation for the baby's position, so I'd take any certainties about you definitely needing a c section with a pinch of salt.

Spinning babies is a great resource for helping correct any positioning issues and has some advice about this: www.spinningbabies.com/pregnancy-birth/labor/engaging-baby-in-labor/

Good luck OP, I hope it all goes well for you!

Also, I didn't experience false labour with either of mine. Some people do, some don't. It's a really individual thing.

Thank you everyone. I’m booked for an induction next week but I might push it back, my midwife thinks it won’t work anyway without the baby being engaged.

I’ve started getting lots of braxton hicks today so I’m hoping that means something positive since I don’t normally get them so much. I’ve still got no other signs though, no mucus plug, no waters, no false Labour

I never had any braxton hicks. Felt absolutely nothing. Went in to be induced at 8 days over and they could see contractions on the CTG, but they were causing me zero pain. Next morning I went into labour (oh yes, those I did feel!), was 3 in 10 within 2 hours and dilated from 2 to 9 cm in a couple hours after that.

I had not mucus plug with either baby, waters went about 2 mins before baby 1 and baby 2 born en caul. I know it is hard but try doing something to take your
mind off it and good luck as one way or the other it will happen eventually.

I think your midwife is slightly off base. Neither of my two engaged before labour and actually didn’t engage until quite late on in labour. I also had no Braxton Hicks either. Genuinely don’t think it means anything for a lot of women. Fingers crossed things start happening for you soon though xx

Thanks everyone. This is reassuring
I’m just hoping this baby gets a move on but I’m definitely still feeling a bit more hopeless after that appointment

She said your baby was big?

Did she refer you for a scan? How’s your grow chart? What does that say?

I had a scan 2 weeks ago because fundal height was measuring at 95
the scan said the baby was more likely around 80th percentile.
I think she wasn’t saying she was too big to deliver, but that perhaps if she hadn’t moved into place now, and she was already so big that maybe it would be difficult for her to move now? I don’t know I wasn’t really sure. I should have asked more questions really.

I’ve booked in for a sweep with another midwife tomorrow and I’m going to try and get a second opinion on my chances of spontaneous Labour.

Sorry to hear this, your midwife sounds so unsupportive.
My son was not engaged at 40 weeks, bump didn’t drop, I never had a single Brixton hick contraction.
i did prep since 35 weeks - dates, raspberry leaf tea, walking, ball bouncing.
i had a sweep at 40+1 and he was born 40+2 after a natural 12 hour labour and delivery.

good luck!!

Just wanted to update this thread for anyone looking in the future because I’ve personally been scouring old threads for glimmers of hope.
I had my sweep with a different midwife, and I went into labour a few hours later, baby born early hours of this morning. Absolutely no problems with him not being engaged enough.