Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Should I (a) not have a birthing partner, or (b) take toddler in to hospital with me?

84 replies

BroccoliSpears · 14/03/2008 21:12

I guess the answer is (a).

If I go into labour in the daytime I have friends who will happily look after the toddler.

If I need to go in in at 3am... what do I do?

Current plan is for dp to put me and dd in the car, drive me to hospital and then either hang around in the corridore with dd, or come home with dd and join me in hosp in the morning once people have woken up and he has given dd to a friend.

Has anyone experience of giving birth alone? I suppose it will be okay. Bit tearful thinking about it but that's probably just hormones.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
fryalot · 15/03/2008 21:24

how's that for a cross post, lulu?

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 21:26

squonk has been doing so much online doulaing, i have given her the role of squonkadoula!

fryalot · 15/03/2008 21:27

I have a doula badge and everything

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 21:28

not sure if this is helping.....

Original poster
BroccoliSpears · 15/03/2008 21:37

No, it is helping. I am laughing.

OP posts:
StarlightMcKenzie · 15/03/2008 21:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

fryalot · 15/03/2008 21:39

trainee doula?

pick me, pick me

starlight... what better way to make friends in a new area than to involve them in the birth of your child?

fryalot · 15/03/2008 21:40

(am not a trainee doula yet, btw... just thinking of it as a possibility for the future.) But if we are fairly near to each other, I would be more than happy to help, either with looking after dd, or rubbing your back for you while your dh sorts out a neighbour to look after her.

StarlightMcKenzie · 15/03/2008 21:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

fryalot · 15/03/2008 21:49

seriously, if a heavily pregnant woman knocked on my door in the middle of the night and said "heeeeeelp" I would be so chuffed.

I would be dining out on that story for years

fryalot · 15/03/2008 21:49

but if you want to invite the new neighbours to witness the birth... I would suggest speaking to the hospital to see if the birthing room is big enough first

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 21:55

me too squonk!

i have to restrain myself from accosting heavily pregnant women and giving htem one of my business cards
!

broccoli, am glad this is cheering you up!

StarlightMcKenzie · 15/03/2008 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 22:18

it is good to have an outlet for my obsession with all things birthy !

pruners · 15/03/2008 22:21

Message withdrawn

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 22:25

you don;t rant pruners..

you are passionate about what you believe. and that is different to ranting

there is not a day that goes by without me reading something to do with pregnancy , birth or breastfeeding....
i need more bookshelves!

pruners · 15/03/2008 22:26

Message withdrawn

StarlightMcKenzie · 15/03/2008 22:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

rookiemater · 15/03/2008 22:34

Ooh sorry not read all of thread but our next door neighbour is pg and her DD plays with DS and we know each other quite well.

I'm secretly hoping that her contractions start in the middle of the night and she will knock on our door and ask us to look after her DD. Just think of the drama and excitement of it all and what good neighbours we'd be.

Sadly their parents don't live so far away so I don't think the situation would arise.

Seriously I'm sure people would be happy to help.

pruners · 15/03/2008 22:34

Message withdrawn

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 22:36

LOL! yep !! or chocolate

or wine

hope you get sorted with a doula.. i reeeeealllllyyyyy want this to be a more positive experience for you..

BitLessTiredNow · 15/03/2008 22:41

I haven't read all the posts but I would happily step in to help ANYONE in this circumstance, no matter what I had going on - in fact would be upset not to be asked. IME people are so kind at this stage - when I was due to give birth to dc3 while dh was working abroad and a 13 hr flight away, I was inundated with offers to help and lots from people I didn't know that well. I would not advise taking toddler with you - just because mine were so upset even in midwife appts when I had internals. Please ask for help and trust people would love to go that extra mile for you.

StarlightMcKenzie · 15/03/2008 22:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Lulumama · 15/03/2008 22:51

it would be hard to giftwrap it too!

readytoswiggin · 15/03/2008 22:56

I had my bf as an additional birthing partner with my third, as dh spends most of early labour chainsmoking in the porch. sadly she missed the birth as she had to collect her dcs from the friend who she had dumped them on and was gutted, as she knows it is highly unlikly she will have the chance again.

I haven't told her I'm secretly planning no4 expect she would be booking tickets, and monthlong childcare!

People are so kind in this situation, it is when you see the best side of society. Get to know people who live near, who could help, most would be honoured. These things do have a habit of resolving themselves.

Or kidnap squonk and hold her hostage!