Staying alone at the hospital

[CartoBarto]

I don't know why I never heard of this, but apparently my partner can't stay overnight with me after I have a c section? Looking into this I've read many accounts from women who had to stay overnight at the hospital with their baby and the vast majority said it was extremely difficult, especially when recovering from c section. Have any of you gone through something like this? How did it go for you? Thank you for your replies!

I don't want everyone's partners staying over when I'm bleeding, vulnerable and hormonal, thanks.

In an ideal world there would be adequate staffing and I'd be comfortable on the ward alone. But recently, I've been in for surgery and rang the buzzer and it's been 20-30 mins before someone came. Just had surgery, alone in a room, unable to get out of bed, no monitors. I could have been in all sorts of trouble and they wouldn't have realised until long after the fact.

If you've just had a section and you're not mobile or able to lift baby yet what are you supposed to do? What if you rang the buzzer because you weren't feeling well or your stitches opened, fell trying to get to baby because no one had come, baby turned a funny colour etc and no one even comes to check on you for half an hour? At least having someone with you means they can go get help, pass you the baby and do what the nurses or midwives are supposed to be doing but simply can't.

Do post partum mothers not have private rooms?I'm presuming wards means there are several women in one larger room.

@StormSeason No. There are sometimes rooms for mothers of twins or additional complications. You also used to be able to pay for amenity rooms but during Covid I think they were taken over by Covid positive patients and from what I can work out haven’t been reinstated in our local hospitals.

I had an ELCS and a private room, but I sent DH home anyway because I wanted him to be well rested and bring me a nice breakfast and a posh coffee in the morning 😂.

Ok very interesting.
I learned something new today.
Thank you!

Yeah mine wasn't allowed to stay, it was absolutely fine though the nurses know you're immobile and do come and help.

I’ve had it both ways - first time (pre covid) my partner could stay which helped so much - he held the baby so I could get a few hours sleep after days of labour (baby kidney be put down) and help me lift, bring food etc.

Second baby during a lockdown so no partners allowed on the ward at all, in all honestly it was absolute hell. It was so short staffed, midwives didn’t have capacity to help with anything and I felt so bad for the first time mums who had no support and those who had c sections who really struggled to even pick up their babies. I got no sleep as again my baby would not be put down and I was exhausted and it was frankly quite dangerous at that point with no help. At least now partners can come in the day so there will be some support. Hopefully things have changed a bit and the midwives have more capacity when you’re there.

It's really interesting to read the range of experiences and expectations on here - some women talking about private rooms and midwives responding to the press of a buzzer with lots of help and support, through to my own experience which was of feeling completely abandoned and alone on a busy ward, lying in a puddle of blood for hours and desperate for paracetamol.

I can understand why the women who had attentive midwives don't want partners staying, but frankly I needed someone - anyone.