Maternal Request ELCS - East Surrey Hospital

[WorryMcGee]

Hi Mumsnet

So for a long list of reasons I want an elective C section. I went through all of them in detail with the midwife at my booking appointment, which resulted in me getting very distressed. Until the shaking and tears she seemed quite dismissive (although perfectly lovely on all other topics besides this). Once I had calmed down, she agreed I could speak to a consultant, has written tokophobia on my notes and wants to refer me to the maternity mental health team - all of which I’m fine with but I did also say that nothing will change my mind and the longer I have to wait without confirmation, the more distressed I will be. It keeps me up at night. She wouldn’t give me any more information at all. My husband is supportive and really helped me state my reasons at the booking appointment when I started to get too upset to be coherent!

Does anyone here have experience with maternal request c section at East Surrey? I can’t find them in the Birthrights stuff. If I have to move hospitals I would rather do it sooner rather than later.

Thank you in advance for any advice and guidance. I have done extensive research and this is the option that is right for me.

My situation is different as I had an ELCS following an EMCS but my hospital verbally confirmed I could choose at the booking in appointment and again at around 20 weeks. The date wasn’t booked until almost 37 weeks but they were very clear that if I wanted one, I would get one.

It does tend to be more straightforward if you’ve already had one but I see no reason why you shouldn’t get confirmation earlier even if you’re not booked in for a date until much nearer the time.

Thank you @scirocco - I’m so pleased you got the reassurance you needed and that you will have the birth you need! I do think I would benefit from some MH support, the midwife said she was referring me but I might get in touch myself anyway. I came off sertraline and am managing okay so far (besides this c section worry) but I’m very aware that could change. Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy ❤️

I'm under the perinatal team at ESH and my mental health nurse has been a wonderful advocate.

She has helped chase all appointments for me and has got me last-minute appointments in the vulnerable women's clinic for birth choices.

If you can get a referral to them, it's really worth it as the consultant works with a psychologist to make a concrete plan for birth and mental health

@traveller11 that’s really reassuring - I’ve just had an appointment come through for the MH team and I was a bit unsure but now I feel more positive about it. Thank you for sharing and wishing you all the best ❤️

I thought I’d come back and update this thread, in case anyone in the same position as me finds it in a Google search. I had my appointment with the MH team today and they were lovely. I am going to stay under their care and they pretty much promised that I could have a c section as they agreed my levels of anxiety over it are far too high. I have a consultant appointment next month for it to be properly confirmed.

Thanks again to everyone who replied and offered support, and if you are reading this because you are also very worried - it looks like it will turn out okay for me, so hopefully it will also be the same for you ❤️

Great news OP, glad everything is working out for you!

Glad you've had a good outcome OP. It's worth looking into some coping mechanisms, breathing techniques etc for if you were to go into labour naturally before your section date. Just so you can stay as calm as possible while waiting for your section.

I had a preconception appointment with the consultant who agreed even before ttc then once pregnant I saw her again at 16w where she added it to my notes. I have my 24w appointment with her next week where we'll discuss when it'll be.

I'm currently in the wait for SASH birthing options to get back to me.

Has anyone actually had any success getting their elective C-section from this trust? Or should I just go private?

So far, everyone I've dealt with - Midwives & Consultant - have been dismissive or have straight out lied to me.

@RedlandDoe I have my birth choices appointment next week so I can let you know how I get on. My consultant intimated they wouldn't give an ELCS for "no reason" but I just smiled and asked who I needed to speak to and he referred me. I am prepared for a fight but hopefully it won't come to that.

I have some good news on that front - mine was agreed, with a smile, and no hint of the fight I’d prepared so diligently (and worked myself up) for! Good luck x

@WorryMcGee that's amazing to hear. I hope this is how it goes for me. Strange that the first line of people you see - in my experience - have been horrible.

@lawandgin I hope it goes well for you! Looking forward to hearing the outcome. I'm also prepared for the fight, but you just end up hoping you don't have to go through it.

@RedlandDoe I have everything crossed for you. The first midwife I ever saw was very dismissive and I was so worried that was a sign of things to come.

Thanks @RedlandDoe and I know what you mean about preparing for the fight. I never bothered mentioning it to a midwife once I knew I'd be consultant led. The midwife did ask at my 25 week appointment why I had an appointment with the birth choices team and I was just like "err because I'd like an ELCS...". It was weird but she didn't question me further

I will update next week!

I'm so glad to read this. All the NCT/hospital birthing classes made me feel like it was a totally mad decision but honestly was right for me.

@cafedesreves it is like that! Even in all the "birth is a feminist action" type books that heavily rely on your birth choices being you choice rarely mention that it is an option. I know it is the right choice for me too, but the birth community as a whole makes it seem like it's insane. Yet, every woman I've talked to, that have chosen to have one, have been so positive about their whole birth experience (just not the lead up to it)

@RedlandDoe @cafedesreves same! Every single woman I have spoken to who had a planned c-section seems to have had a wonderful calm experience. It’s one of the reasons I felt that maybe I could have a baby after all, despite my intense fear.

I had to demand a conversation with the consultant obstetrician at my very well-renowned London hospital. She was highly sensible and told me that 45% of first time mums at that hospital required either forceps, ventouse or EMCS. A world away from the all-fours type birth they paint an image of in their birth classes. I really didn't want to be in a world of pain for hours in end to end up with an almost 50% chance of needing intervention (and then probably stitches, episiotomy etc).

As it happens I went into labour the day before my scheduled C-section. Even the early contractions were bloody painful and I couldn't wait for the spinal. They brought it forward and I had a lovely, peaceful birth on a Sunday. Only but I hated was the injections afterwards. Stomach has gone totally back to post-baby (no "pouch") and scar is so low I could wear a bikini and you wouldn't see it.

Of course, many people would be horrified at the thought of a Caesarian and have had wonderful natural births, but it wasn't for me.

Hi all, just updating following my birth choices appointment this afternoon.

It went really well. I genuinely can't believe how easy that was. I was all prepped for a fight and it turns out I didn't need to be. I basically went in, she asked about my history and how the pregnancy was going. Then asked why I wanted an ELCS and when I'd finished explaining that although I know a section still has risks, for me those risks are more acceptable than the risks of intervention/injury from a vaginal birth, she basically said she was happy to sign me off! The section was requested there and then, I will get a date in the post and that was it....

I'd worked myself up SO much and now I feel much more relaxed!

@lawandgin that’s incredible news! Haha I know what you mean, that’s exactly what I did - prepared myself for an absolute war for no reason at all! Congratulations

Thank you @WorryMcGee hopefully it's the same for @RedlandDoe

@lawandgin that's wonderful! I so glad they were so reasonable about it. Best of luck when you get your date! Did they say what happens if you go into labour before your scheduled C-section?

They did finally give me an appointment with the Birth Option team, but it's not til March when I'm 33 weeks. I feel like it's cutting it unnecessarily close, but I've at least been able to calm down about the whole process.

@RedlandDoe good to hear you have an appointment, but I can understand you feeling it's a bit late. I was asked what I would want to do and I said that I supposed it would then become an c emergency section as I still wouldn't want a vaginal birth. That was also accepted without question. I saw the lead birth options consultant and she had a trainee present. She was more than reasonable so I really hope it's the same for you. You might want to ask your midwife to update your notes with your birth preference before the appointment in case anything were to happen.