Homebirth - anyone had a bad one, or regretted their decision to have one?

[jennifersofia]

I have had both my babies at home and both times it was a brilliant experience. I have heard so many sad and horrible stories from women about their hospital births, I wonder how much of my good experience was from being at home. Hardly hear about homebirths that have 'gone wrong'. If this is the case, why doesn't the NHS encourage more homebirths?

Fantastic news. Well done.

Well done hughsie and welcome to your little babe too!

Fabulous News Hughsie - Congratulations to all of you.

Congratulations Hughsie to you and your expanded family!

Thanks to everyone for the kind messages. I am completely besotted with ds2 and still buzzing after the brilliant home birth experience. Cant get over the fact that he is safely here and that I got my wish of a home birth.

STill a bit sleep deprived but it's all worth it and somehow there is enough love for the second child and it is just there instantly!

Thanks to you all

Hughsie, you make it sound absolutely wonderful. Hope you don't mind I'd like to ask a question.

I mentioned to my GP that this time round I might consider a home birth as I was induced with my dd and it was absoutely awful. I've always felt that most of it was because I felt out of control and very scared so a home birth seemed a natural choice. My GP however stated that I should not mention it until very close to the event otherwise the hospital will refuse to perform tests/scans etc. She stated that if I started opting for a homebirth the hospital would understand from this that I wanted no interference and a totally natural birth. Is this true? Should I keep quiet about this? Anyone else experienced this.

Congratulations Hughsie. Wills - sounds strange, I've booked a homebirth, and had no hassle at all from the hospital - business as normal as far as they're concerned, because I have the same midwife as if I was booked in for a hospital appointment.

Hughsie, congratulations, so glad you got the home birth you wanted, and it all went well. jemw

Well done hugsie

Hughsie - I'm so glad everything worked out as you wanted. Congratulations on your new little addition. Take care

Congratulations Hughsie, so thrilled for you.

Wills - my mw suggested the hb last time, fairly near the end and said not to mention it to my GP as he was known to be a bit anti so first he knew was the new baby check at the house. He was fine though. This time I've opted for HB from the start. Haven't seen my GP so not an issue. MW is fine and I've had no problems at all with scans etc, even at the EPU they are fine about HB. Sounds to me like its your GP with a bit of a hang up about it. There is no way you'd be refused other things just because you wanted to give birth in one particular place. I suspect GP is just hoping that given time you will change your mind. How are you feeling now?

Wills - my mw advised not mentioning at the GP as they are anti the homebirth as they worry they may be called upon and do not have the experience to participate. I was booked for a domino originally and only confirmed my hb at week 36 but my mw was aware I was considering it from about week 30. There seems to be some stigma attached to them by some hospitals/GPs - almost that you are taking a risk and so they want to wash their hands of you - having said that my consultant at my week 40 final appointment merely pointed out to me that the risk of intervention was 5% having had a ventouse on ds1. Thankfully all was well - and I suspect would have been with ds1 given a more relaxed environment.

Good luck with whatever you decide and I'm so glad this pregnancy is working out for you. I know how hard it was being pregnant with ds1 following 2 losses and still cant believe I'm lucky enough to have a second healthy child.

Thanks to everyone else for the congratulations - it really is nice having mumsnet support and encouragement.

Feeling ok, still nervous. I think I felt the baby move yesterday. I was leant against a counter cooking lunch when I suddenly realised that there was a very small commotion going on below (tiny but definite). I'm not convinced it wasn't wind as I'm only 15 wks but am hopeful. I'm obviously more confident in that I've plucked up enough courage to start considering labour and reading this thread has only made me wish to investigate further although I'm not sure my dh is keen. I think he will only agree if I agree to booking a team of cleaners to come in afterwards, although reading this thread it doesn't seem to be that much of an issue.

Wills beleive me you will not need the cleaners in. It is totally mess free by the time the MW leaves. Now a week or so later perhaps.....

And they discharge you so soon these days. The best thing about HB for me was not having to worry about getting anywhere when having contractions and not having to worry about packing up to come home once it was over. Within an hour we were all tucked up in bed together. The MW made tea then left us to it. Heaven

Hughsie, many congratulations and v. pleased to hear you got your home birth.
Wills, maybe you should take anything your GP says about antenatal care with a big pinch of salt...you mentioned on another thread that she was not too supportive when you were seeking an early scan. It may be that she sincerely believes what she told you, or she may be trying to put you off - because in some areas I think homebirths are the responsibility of the GP practice and she might be reluctant to offer this service. (If that is the case, you can ask to be referred to a local GP who DOES offer home birth support).
Anyway, I am sure that it is NOT the case that hospitals decline to offer routine, basic antenatal scans and monitoring because you are interested in a home birth. I can't believe that is true. I would check direct with the hospital on this one, because of course regional facilities and services do vary.

Wills
My dp was not so keen on a homebirth initially, but that was because we both assumed it was out of the question following first childs premature labour, and complications.
However, the team I was with were v strong on hb and at 36weeks we had a long talk, (Me, dp and 2 midwives) where we discussed it all and he was keen on it then, felt happier knowing the midwives in advance, and what the options were re transfers to hospital etc,

wills HB option is entirely your decision. What helps if u have a good relationship with your Midwife or whoever is taking care of you through your pregnancy. 7mths ago I had my precious no2 at home. well it was the baby who decided on HB, never allowed much time to get to the hospital. It was all natural (no pain killers), u never get to see the mess... given the choice would I plan for HB again...YES. its so less intervening, no moving from one ward to the other. one2one attention...provided your MW is happy with your health and the baby it should be an enjoyable experience. GOOD LUCK

wills HB option is entirely your decision. What helps if u have a good relationship with your Midwife or whoever is taking care of you through your pregnancy. 7mths ago I had my precious no2 at home. well it was the baby who decided on HB, never allowed much time to get to the hospital. It was all natural (no pain killers), u never get to see the mess... given the choice would I plan for HB again...YES. its so less intervening, no moving from one ward to the other. one2one attention...provided your MW is happy with your health and the baby it should be an enjoyable experience. GOOD LUCK

Congrats Hughsie.

Wills , have you considered booking for a domino scheme? After having my first at home because she came so quickly, my future pgs were always domino, on the understanding that I was very likely to deliver at home. That way the mw was prepared for a hb, and I got the scans etc needed from the hospital.

I have to say I loved giving birth at home. You get to stay in your own bed, with your own familiar things, and just your own baby, no snoring farting mums sleeping through their baby trying to burst my eardrums. I didn't even notice any mess after having mine, it's all cleared away by the midwife. It's all very intimate and special I think, even if the world and his wife are attending as in my first!.

I used the domino scheme for my dd's pregnancy and it was wonderful, but we've moved since then and its not offered in this new area - unfortunately.

It might be called something else where you live, it was called "west wing" where I used to be. You've probably already found out if it is or not, but just in case you hadn't .

Wills - what a lot of ill informed rubbish comes out of your GP's mouth. Be reassured that it makes no difference to your antenatal care where you decide to give birth. You will get the same scans, appointments etc. Speak to your midwife about your options - your GP seems to know next to nothing.

Wills - I've never seen my GP with any of my pg. I went straight to the MW every time. They are much more in the know and sympathetic. They can organise everything you need, from homebirth to scans and tests - and they have a much nicer way of doing it too. I think you GP is a bit past it by the sounds of it

Hope you are feeling OK by the way. Spent yesterday in bed with a high temp and flu symptoms. Temp back down today but still feeling v. sorry for myself. Other than that though things still going well. Doesn't feel right posting on the mc thread anymore. Maybe we should start a new thread here for Anxious mums-to-be

Wills -I agree with Mears... what nonesense.. never heard this from a GP before !

Pupuce
Can you give me the name of the books you mentioned. Suggested reading for those thinking of home births.