Birthing without tearing?

[doritodiva]

Is it possible to give birth without tearing?

Dorito diva I’m a midwife and I’ve had 3 big babies without tearing. I didn’t do anything special myself but I now know that some research suggests that perineal massage may help. So much research has gone in to why/who tears. A lot of women do to some degree, I’ve seen the figure 80% up thread and I think that is about right for first time mums, it’s less for second and subsequent babies. Water births are less likely to have a small tear but if they do tear it’s likely to be worse according to research. The main thing you can practically do is listen to your midwife and control the delivery of the head as much as possible. Breathe baby out and resist the urge to push to get it over with. It’s very normal to have a small tear which your midwife can repair with a few dissolvable stitches. More serious tears will be repaired in theatre by a doctor. Try not to worry 🙂

I didn’t have any tearing or even a graze with my first. I had a small tear with my second who was much bigger and birthed very quickly which meant I had a few stitches afterwards but I didn’t feel anything at all and it made no difference to my recovery. Good luck with your delivery :)

I had joined tears, just a small graze.

I did lots of perineal massage from 36 weeks. Massage is the wrong word, it's basically stretching and if done correctly is not relaxing. Not painful but perhaps a bit uncomfortable. I did it myself 5 times a week, some of my antenatal friends had their partners do it but I didn't really want that association tbh!

Also really slow pushing, shooting baby out is more likely to cause tears. I pushed for an hour but was only actually pushing for 10 minutes as I kept stopping to enjoy the G&A 😆 And no holding your breath like they do on TV.

Epidurals up the risk of tearing as you can't really feel what you're doing.

My friend had an egg shaped balloon device she used pre birth and didn't need stitches, you could get one of those.

*Had no tears. Not joined tears, that sounds awful!

@PatchworkElmer

I ‘just’ grazed and it stung like you wouldn’t believe!

Me too with my second. Hurt like fuck when I wee’d! Worse than with my first when I was stitched up.

@MrsFluffyMuff wow! What's your secret??

@Mangosmoothie thank you. That's really helpful. It was just such a painful recovery after the episiotomy. I'm looking at hypnobirthing now.

No tears for any of my 3 kids. All inductions with epidurals. Midwives we’re excellent at telling when best to push so I think that helped me avoid hearing by not pushing at the wrong point

I just had 2 small grazes, first baby, 7lb 1oz, water birth. In established labour for 3 hours 52 minutes.

Not sure if any of that makes a difference

I had 6lb 9 baby with no tearing or grazing. I used an epino balloon thing for 2-3 weeks before the birth and I really think it helped stretch and give me an idea of how to push, how hard etc.

I did with ds1 but I think I pushed him out to quick. With dd and ds2 I was slightly more relaxed so didnt push them out as quick if that makes sense?

[quote doritodiva]@MrsFluffyMuff wow! What's your secret?? [/quote]
Her Fluffy Muff Id say

[quote doritodiva]@MrsFluffyMuff wow! What's your secret?? [/quote]
Probably the fluffiness of her muff

X post

Yeah my baby was 9lb 9oz and I had no tearing and didn't even hurt after

Never tore with either of my two births.
One just gas and air
The other epidural
Both vaginal
I’m quitting whilst I’m ahead now!

That sounded like bragging but it wasn't! I was just trying to reassure you that it is possible.

I did tear with DC1 who was 8lb8oz but not badly just a few stitches

I had an episiotomy on my first dc, recovered fine, second dc was fine, maybe a slight graze and he was just under 10lb. No tear at all!

I don’t think speed of labour can be the determining factor, because I’ve had three vaginal deliveries without grazing, tearing or cutting and they were 48 hours, 2 hours and 13 hours respectively.

Probably a lot of it is luck. I had two of mine before 30, which might help. I also had a friend who swore by massaging oil into the perineum during pregnancy and she had three perfect deliveries, including twins. That might be worth a try, and in case there is anything in the age theory, I would take collagen tablets if I found myself having a menopause baby.

I did with my last baby, only a graze although I did beg for stitches as I couldn't believe I'd had a baby without needing them. I'd had a very quick, very relaxed water birth. Quick labour and she was out in 3 pushes, midwife caught her by the foot.
First DC was tear plus episiotomy (failed ventouse and successful forceps) and LOADS of stitches.

I had am episiotomy on my first and a tear on my second. Surprisingly I healed much faster with the tear. I was back to myself within 4 weeks. It really wasnt that bad at all. I was worried but I didnt need to be.

Yes. I had the slightest of grazes with ds1 (2 hour 30 mins labour, 1 hour 10 minutes of that pushing), no tearing at all with ds2 ( 2 hours 45 minutes labour, 4 minutes of pushing) and even with ds3 didn't need stitches.

My SIL's babies were both smaller than mine and her labours less speedy and she tore and needed stitches both times; if anything she was more prepared (in terms of perineal massage and using oils and so on) than me. I honestly think it's almost entirely luck.

As PP said about birthing position, I believe this is important. My easier birth was on all fours.
Women giving birth on their backs only started as King Louis had a fetish for it.

I had grazes both times. They were both water births and I did perineal massage with my first. The graze was at the front rather than at the back. I read if you are on all fours you are more likely to damage the front. I am not sure which is worse though!