Epidural negativity?!

[Rachel12551]

I'm just wondering why people are so negative when I tell them I'm opting for an epidural (if possible of course, I know it's not always guaranteed to happen)? They say things like "you might not need it" or "I didn't have one and I was fine, are you sure?".

I have suffered with major anxiety for 15 years and have done a lot of research and feel it's the best option for me to have a positive birthing experience. I've also researched hypnobirthing and want to use those techniques as well.

It's as if people think you're cheating or not giving birth "properly". I'm aware things can go wrong and it doesn't always work 100% efficiently but isn't this the case for childbirth in general?

Has anyone else felt this? Just feeling a bit deflated over it

I think if you're mentally happy with the pain relief option you've picked, then that's the one to go with.
By the time I was 41 and ready to give birth I was petrified, I mean really petrified of all pain relief apart from paracetamol. Midwives didn't believe me. I gave birth without any painkillers but was in control emotionally. That's the most important thing for you.
If you believe an epidural will help you feel calm and in control there is nothing else. Xx

You do what is right for you, everyone else can go whistle. The only thing I will say is be aware they can fail. This happened to me and I ended up giving birth with only gas and air. It was worse than if I had decided not to have one as I was all stressed about it. I’ve been told when this happens it’s due to unusual anatomy so likely to be the case for me again...

Because every one has an opinion on everything when it comes to pregnancy.
If you opt for no pain relief, its 'you wont get a medal you know'
If you opt for pain relief, its 'but I didnt have pain relief'

You can never win, ever!

You're over thinking it. You might not need one. A spinal isn't something that should be taken lightly. It numbs everything from the waist down. It has risks albeit relatively low. It can take some time for the feeling to come back in your legs.

Women who have had babies will give you the advice that you don't know how you'll feel. Because they know that. They've been there. It's different every time. First time round you may feel like you want to be in control and it may appear to some that you've made a decision about your pain relief without even knowing it you'll need it.

They're trying to reassure you. Labour isn't horrific for everyone and not everyone needs pain relief.

This makes me so mad!

You wouldn’t have your wisdom teeth out without anaesthetic!

Yet people believe that labour pains are “natural” and so don’t count!

I had epidurals for all three of mine, and it was blissful.

As long as you make the right choice for you, fuck everyone else!

I have had 2 children one with epidural and one without. ( pros and cons of epidural )
Pros: More relaxing and no pain.
Cons: My Back never been the same since, constant back ache. Slowed down the labour, felt a lot more tired after.
Do what is best for you. X

I was just about to say the same as previous poster.

2 babies, 1 with and 1 without.
Without was more intense but I felt more in control.
With epidural I felt like the midwife was controlling everything and I was uncomfortable being connected to wires and tubes, and laid down on my back. It didn't feel natural.

My back has been much weaker since the epidural too. I wish i'd gone for pethidine or some other pain relief tbh. Plus actually having the epidural injected in to my spine hurt like hell

Just don't tell the anaesthetist you love him and want him never to leave you again. As I did, while 8cms dilated and basically crazed.

Instant no pain and straightforward birth.

With my first birth I found the epidural just amazing. It worked so well, and I changed from feeling like a completely out-of-control pain-crazed demon to calm, focused and pain-free. I think epidurals are miraculous. Please just chose what is best for you.

When you go into labour, see how you are coping and if everything is progressing well, you may not need an epidural. I'd say if you can manage without, don't have one but if you really do feel the need, go for it.

Same as some PP’s, one birth with an epidural, one without.

I did develop a spinal headache after the epidural and had to go back in for a spinal tap, which was a bugger...but given that DD was nearly 10lbs, the pain relief was probably worth it.🤣

Opted not to for DS and managed with nothing,it hurt like hell but I got through it.

So do whatever feels best for you and don’t worry too much. 💐

I never experienced a single contraction during my first birth which was thanks to an epidural.
I can't stand all the comments about epidurals causing interventions. There is no way of knowing what would have happened without the epidural.
Stop talking to people about it - it's really nobody's business except yours. It's amazing how opinionated the world and it's dog is regarding what women do with their bodies.

There are risks attached to it. I had an epidural and it was fantastic, I'd have one again! My baby was transverse which led to an emcs and a doctor told me after that the pain would have been off the charts as I dilated had I not had my epidural. You're more likely to need intervention but it turned out that my dd would have only come out by c-section so I'm glad I had one as it made no difference to the outcome.

It's very much a culture thing. I gave birth in France and here more than 90% of women have an epidural. It is assumed that you will have one, in fact you meet with the anaesthetist a couple of weeks before due date to be sure it is all organised. The perspective is very much that giving birth is difficult enough, so why would you refuse pain relief. If you want an epidural, have an epidural.

Nothing but a positive reaction from me. I was induced and they couldn't slow down my contractions, from being 2cm and 6 hours of constant contractions with no gap I had an epidural...best thing ever! I don't get any side effects, in fact I could still feel the contractions and move my legs but no pain.

@ginflinger I did exactly the same 😂

Please ignore everyone who uses the ‘cascade of intervention’ argument.

They have been proven wrong but continue to cling to their incorrect outdated beliefs.

I wonder why?

Well I don’t wonder really.

OP I have had four births. The first three I had no pain relief, due to a determination to give birth as unassisted as possible and feeling that I would have 'failed' on some level if I needed help. For my last and most recent birth I had an epidural and oh my god it was the best thing ever and the best and most peaceful birth of all of them. Take the drugs and have no shame

Have one if you want one OP, simple as that! I had one when I had DS in June. The relief of awful pain fading away after hours labouring on the drip with nothing more than paracetamol and a TENS machine (my choice, I didn’t get on with gas & air) was just incredible. I had to have an episiotomy and forceps but DS had turned transverse so it was that or a section.
Be warned your mobility may take a while to fully return. I think it was at least a fortnight before I was walking normally and had full sensation back in my midsection and legs.

I loved my epidural.

No problems here! Get one if you want one.

@IdblowJonSnow

I never experienced a single contraction during my first birth which was thanks to an epidural. I can't stand all the comments about epidurals causing interventions. There is no way of knowing what would have happened without the epidural. Stop talking to people about it - it's really nobody's business except yours. It's amazing how opinionated the world and it's dog is regarding what women do with their bodies.

Excuse my ignorance but if you don't experience any contractions, how do you know labour is progressing and when to push? I thought an epidural just lessened pain but you still felt contractions.

Jessstan1 re not feeling anything, the midwife checked from time to time to see how things were progressing. I didn't have long labours but one benefit of epidural is that you don't get exhausted by the delivery before you have even started with the childcare journey. The biggest disadvantage to me was having to wait for my legs to return to life.

Excuse my ignorance but if you don't experience any contractions, how do you know labour is progressing and when to push? I thought an epidural just lessened pain but you still felt contractions.

I didn't feel anything after my epidural. They tell you when to push, but I couldn't feel that either. I can see why many end in assisted/EMCS after an epidural for this reason like mine did, but for me personally it was still worth it to not be in pain.

Honestly, I wish I had never had my epidural, even though the pain relief was immense. I'm 5 months pregnant again and won't be having one this time.

You never think the side effects are going to happen to you. Well- they did for me. And it was horrendous. Due to the complications from the epidural going working I had to stay on the post natal ward for 6 days post birth whilst completely bed bound having to lie flat on my back, and was catheterised for most of that time. When I did get home I had by this point lost control of my bladder and could barely move an inch. I also have to have two operations to fix the boxed epidural (I had a really several dural tap). It meant long term I couldn't breast feed and honestly the whole thing was incredibly traumatic.

So pick it by all means, but be aware the risk factors are real and do happen and aren't to be sniffed at. Sorry to potentially be a downer, but it's best to be honest!

Apologies for the typos!