Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Why do you want a short stay in hospital?

98 replies

RainbowFlowers · 18/05/2020 10:32

I'm 39 weeks pregnant with second pregnancy. My first birth was awful, this time I may have an elective c section but I'm also keeping an open mind for if I go into labour before then.

At my midwife & consultant appointments they seem to try to reassure me by telling me I won't have a long stay in hospital. I know due to corona they don't want people staying unesseraily. Also on threads here and people I have spoke to have made a point of saying that they were in and out quick and that was good.

Having a short stay at hospital doesn't reassure me. I don't want to be rushed out. I want to feel like I am ready. Especially since I didn't get to breast feed first time round so I would like the extra support with that this time. Also since it seems like health visitor appointments will be reduced following the birth I want to get as much support as possible at the hospital. I don't really understand where the assumption that I would like to leave quickly is coming from.

So I am just wondering what are peoples reasons for wanting to get out of hospital quickly? I feel like I am missing something.

Thank you

OP posts:

RandomMess · 19/05/2020 10:13

Well I didn't get support with breast feeding, by the time the bell was answered baby had screamed herself back to sleep. Couldn't sleep in there far too noisy, lights on, people coming and going etc.

museumum · 19/05/2020 10:15

I couldn’t sleep a wink in hospital. Bright lights, so much noise and hotter than hell.
Sleep is hard to get at all with a newborn but in hospital I just had to sit awake for two days and two nights till ds was discharged (I was fine).

whoknowswhichwayisup · 19/05/2020 10:20

I stayed in 5 days with my first and it was honestly the most traumatic thing I've experienced. I self discharged wjth my second. The whole experience was horrible. But that's at our hospital and you might have a completely different experience with a different hospital. I think most people are just happier to be at home with their family.

Rebelwithallthecause · 19/05/2020 10:31

Can I self discharge after c section?

They kept me in days longer than I felt necessary last time

Kept going on about breastfeeding despite not giving any help and refusing to acknowledge serious tongue tie

thepurplepenguin · 19/05/2020 10:32

With my first I stayed in for 2 nights and I hated it. Like others it took about 6 hours from the point I was told I could be discharged for the paperwork to actually be completed. I was climbing the walls whilst waiting.

Second time round I was allowed to go home after 3 1/2 hours (had a shower and some toast and baby latched on straight away). It was perfect, I got home and just snuggled up with him on the sofa. Had to go back the next day for the routine newborn checks but it was totally worth it.

InDubiousBattle · 19/05/2020 12:26

It varies from hospital to hospital I think. With my first I was in for 2 nights (1 in labour,he was born at lunchtime, then the night after he was born)and they were just about the most shitty days I've ever had! I was discharged utterly exhausted having had 1 hours sleep in 60 hours and starving (due to various cock ups). No support for the mws, just a parade of other people's visitors, too much noise, in a ward that was hotter than hell. My SIL however loved her 3 days spent in hospital, lots of support, a mw to help at every breastfeed, decent food, comfortable surroundings.

ElphiasDoge · 19/05/2020 12:32

I was surprised about not being pushed out! I had a lovely straightforward labour and was very well but DS was very sick in NICU. They kept me in for a week on postnatal. I kept expecting them to tell me they needed the bed and felt it was hanging over me! He stayed in another couple of weeks and I was discharged but they did offer me a room in Ronald McDonald’s house even though I only lived 10 minutes away. I went home.

lingo · 19/05/2020 17:38

Because the first night I spent in hospital after the birth of my first was the worst night of my life - no sleep and felt like very little support was available and very conscious of being on an open ward. More generally the food is atrocious and there's nothing like the comfort of home. Was delighted to being in at 5am and out by 5pm with my second!

TurquoiseDress · 19/05/2020 20:31

After DC1 was born I could not wait to get home!

The ward was so noisy constantly, in my bay 3 other women & their babies plus their partners and associated visitors.

Smelly take away food stinking the place out. Male partners & friends/relatives trying to use the bathroom in our bay

Plus the midwives were generally miserable, took ages to respond to anything, my drug went missing so I didn't get the pain meds I needed (fun times post-CS ) and we were generally made to feel like a nuisance.

(sorry, I know midwives are meant to be NHS heroes etc- mine definitely were not!)

2 nights in there were torture. I felt immeasurably better once we got home and we could then get on with getting to know our new baby & relax as a little family in our home.

DC2 I was better prepared, wangled myself a private room & managed to escape after 1 night and was home the following evening (had another CS). I even took some of my own pain meds in my handbag just in case (obviously you're not meant to do that)

So for me, that's why I wanted to get home! Of course, if either DC had been unwell or myself needing more medical input then I would have stayed if that was on medical advice.

Before DC1 I had no real ideas about things, I just thought I'd want to be in hospital definitely for the birth but I'd not really given any thought whatsoever to afterwards. After DC1 it then clinked and I actually began to understand how some women preferred to be at home & give birth there etc.

TurquoiseDress · 19/05/2020 20:32

*my drug chart went missing!

Megan2018 · 19/05/2020 20:36

I had a lovely long stay by choice.

1 night in hospital (necessary as I had GD and baby had to have bloods checked). Then I asked to transfer to lovely local birthing centre for 3 nights postnatal care. It was epic. Loved it.
Fabulous support and food, like a very niche hotel

Everyone I know had great experiences in hospital, nothing like the horror stories on here. We are all still EBF too which I think is due to having so much time.

Obviously I understand it’s different now with Covid though.

bluefoxmug · 19/05/2020 20:37

because post natal ward is noisy without any privacy.

sooveritalready · 19/05/2020 20:46

Sleep
Having husband around 24 hours to help
Family able to pop round
Not having to use hospital shared bathroom

sooveritalready · 19/05/2020 20:49

And the food, was starving!

Musmerian · 19/05/2020 20:51

@Pineapplebaby - you don’t have to wait until they ‘let you leave’. It’s not prison. You can leave when you choose.

highmarkingsnowbile · 19/05/2020 21:07

And the food, was starving!

Yes, and with first timers, they often don't tell you that you have to walk along and queue up to get it. Then they tell you that you can't leave your baby to get it, so if you're one of those people who doesn't have someone staying with you 24/7, how are you supposed to eat?

The 24/7 guests in a ward designed only for the patients but now with them and the babies crammed in, the guests usually using the toilet, too, as CBA'd to buzz in and out to use the visitor toilets or to leave the room to use it.

Then they force you to keep the curtains open.

Then wonder why breastfeeding rates are so low.

mamasiz · 19/05/2020 21:12

I want to get in and out of hospital as quickly as possible. I’m 27 weeks pg with my second. Due to my DS having a respiratory condition he will be at home with my DH while I’m in labour. We have no family locally and I will be fretting about him going anywhere else as he currently needs shielding. I just want to have my baby and get back to my family. My experience of the postnatal ward wasn’t that great and I would prefer to be at home ASAP.

Lolalovesmarmite · 20/05/2020 15:33

For anyone reading this and worrying, can I balance it with the fact that I have had two very positive experiences on post natal wards. My first baby in 2018 I was in for four days. I was in a four person bay with at most one other lady, partners weren’t allowed overnight so it was lovely and quiet and the midwives were incredibly helpful and supportive. I had my second baby two weeks ago and spent the night on the postnatal ward - so mid coronavirus restrictions - and I was the only person in the bay. The facilities were clean, I was brought my meals and the midwives again were brilliant and very helpful and caring. These were both NHS hospitals in different parts of the country. I feel very sorry for anyone who has an awful experience but for anyone who is reading this and worrying, it’s not that bad for everyone by any stretch. People frequently only write about the very bad and the very good.

Murraygoldberg · 20/05/2020 15:41

The other people, I was opposite a teenage mother and her boyfriend, made non stop racquet., they wanted to leave the new born and come back to collect it the next day, several hours spent ( between them nipping in and out for cigarettes) before the threat of social work got the mum to stay overnight , this meant no time for the other mums and babies. Not the midwives fault the rest of us knew what was going on as the parents were shouting about it amongst themselves and on phone to others

CottonSock · 20/05/2020 15:43

Didn't sleep a wink.

Booksandwine80 · 20/05/2020 15:45

Postnatal wards are hell on earth at the best of times but even more so now with visiting restrictions etc. Go home as soon as you are safe/well enough to do so.

Good luck

Purpleartichoke · 20/05/2020 15:49

I find it close to impossible to sleep in the hospital. When dd was born, I didn’t sleep for 56 hours between the lead up and the time I had to stay afterwards. I was an absolute wreck mentally by the end. They wanted me to stay another day because I had a difficult c-section, but thankfully DH was there to help advocate and get me out of there before the situation got even worse.

Violet956 · 20/05/2020 15:51

You couldn't pay me to stay on a postnatal ward again.

I had an EMCS after 35 hour labour and would rather have done that all over again than spend 2 nights in there. The second night I slept in the communal nursing room as I couldn't rest in my own bed.

The midwives didn't help me with my latch at all, very rushed. (as they are obviously very busy)

Rebelwithallthecause · 20/05/2020 16:58

I’m on the post natal ward right now

I thought it would be better because of no visitors

But two of the women here are constantly on their phones on loudspeaker so I can hear everything, the other one is constantly texting with the sounds on

All I can hear is click click click

Thank goodness I have my headphones

OhArsebags · 20/05/2020 17:21

Apart from the miserable and sometimes down right rude midwives (it was my second so I was under no illusions that they Would be any help at all, sadly), I had a great time after my second dc and section and didn’t want to leave!

I was in a two bed room but no one was funny about the curtains being pulled all the time so it was fine, three meals a day we’re delivered to my bedside after I’d chosen them in advance and I had a fancy electric bed. She was born on the wed and I went home Friday afternoon but I wish I’d stayed over the weekend if only for the amazing bed. My own felt like concrete compared to it and I didn’t have the remote control to help me raise and lower parts.

Due again in August but a different hospital. All they keep saying is they hope to have me out in 24 hours.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Swipe left for the next trending thread