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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Am I crazy to be planning a natural birth for 1st baby? Reassurance needed please!

119 replies

missbumpy · 05/09/2007 16:59

I've decided that I want to try to have a natural birth. I'm going to a birthing centre (in a large hospital so near to doctors/surgeons if things go wrong) and I'd really like to try to do it with just a birth pool and gas and air. I've been reading up on it as much as poss and I've been really encouraged by some of the books on the subject.

I'm not an idiot and I know that things can go wrong and I'm prepared that I might not be able to cope with the pain etc. However, I've had quite a few people telling me I'm mad for considering a natural birth and it's making me start to doubt myself.

Some of the comments are coming from people like my brother who doesn't have any kids so I take it with a pinch of salt. I've also had lots of disparaging comments from women who've had kids (and who chose to have an epidural) telling me that I'll be begging for all the drugs I can get once I go into labour.

Sorry this is turning into a bit of an essay. I suppose I'm just looking for a bit of reassurance from other MNers who've had natural births. I just need to know it can be done and that I'm not crazy for wanting to do it this way.

OP posts:

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PippiLangstrump · 05/09/2007 21:44

plan for natural but be open to possible change of mind once you're there.

I planned natural and I had only gas and air. although admittedly I begged for an epidural but was too late and DD came 1/2 later.

do not be cross if you change your mind or if you are not as 'brave' as you thought you'd be.

myjobismum · 05/09/2007 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MKG · 06/09/2007 01:22

I've been lucky to have fast labors and births, so have never had any pain relief.

1st was an induction and second was natural labor.

Keep an open mind and everything will be fine.

kama · 06/09/2007 01:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

welliemum · 06/09/2007 02:42

I've delivered both of mine without medication of any kind (no G&A).

And I'm not some sort of masochistic looney I promise!

What worked for me was keeping active, walking around at first, then standing up hanging onto DH. It was horribly painful but I never felt that the pain was more than I could bear. The very worst pain I experienced was when lying on the bed to be examined - that was just excruciating.

Not having medication wasn't a decision exactly, but obviously if you're walking around you can't have an epidural and you can't take anything that makes you woozy, which ruled out pretty much all the options. And being on my feet was making me feel so much better that I didn't want to stop. So it was a practical thing really.

I get really sad at the way people turn pain relief into some kind of moral thing, ie that you're being weak if you ask for pain relief. I would say, read up about the options and about active birth as much as you can, then when labour comes just see how you go.

Good luck!

twentypence · 06/09/2007 03:07

Stop telling people and the problem will go away.

I had a water birth no gas and air (I did have some paracetamol the next day though) and I was fine.

Dh kept telling everyone that I did it with no pain relief and I had to ask him to stop as it just wasn't relevant. In fact the only place it is relevant now is if someone asks if they are mad to consider it.

No you are not mad to consider it - but don't get drawn into discussions about it, they are simply never worth it.

tigerschick · 06/09/2007 07:43

Don't listen.
I didn't have a birth plan and didn't really know what I wanted. In the end dd was coming so quickly that there wasn't time for anything other than gas and air and that made me feel awful. So I had dd with no pain relief at all, and lived to tell the tale!!
You'll be fine, but it is very important to keep an open mind as you never know what will actually happen.

LazyLinePainterJane · 06/09/2007 07:58

my mum had 5 children, all just g&a.

Original poster

missbumpy · 06/09/2007 09:11

You're right 20pence, I don't generally talk about what kind of birth I'm planning/hoping for but people do ask (which is kind of strange in itself because surely it's quite a private, personal thing?). Maybe I'll just start being a bit vaguer and saying that I haven't decided yet - which is sort of true since I don't think I'll know how much pain relief I'll need until I'm in the middle of it.

OP posts:

TwitmonstEr · 06/09/2007 09:17

I have always said I'd take what I needed as, if and when I needed it. If I wanted something specific, like a water birth, or to let the cord stop pulsing before being cut, I'd make sure m/w etc knew, but I'd be flexible at the end of the day because you just don't know, and that goes for no4 as well as no1.
I have heard alot of people saying they have felt as if they let themselves down by not following strict birthplan, which is awful. Make your wishes known and fight for them, but please don't be upset or angry if you get there and change your mind.

Most of all GOOD LUCK and all the best, there is no reason for you to not have your natural birth.

twentypence · 06/09/2007 09:18

Give the name of the hospital and then tell the person that you have been admiring their shoes for the last 5 minutes and where on earth did they find them - they are gorgeous.

People only generally ask so they can talk about themselves some more - so get them onto a safe subject like shoes or hair.

SuperMonkey · 06/09/2007 09:21

It's already been said, but I'll add my voice! I managed with just paracetamol and a bath (at home, not a birthing pool). Don't get me wrong, it hurt, but it was definitely bearable, breathing and focussing on what I was meant to be doing just got me through it. I'm convinced it happened a lot more quickly and I recovered better for not having any drugs. I would definitely plan it that way next time, but I would try to remain open-minded about the need for drugs if things didn't go to plan.

Mercy · 06/09/2007 09:24

I kept an open mind too and managed without any pain-relief for my first and second (bit of gas and air though).

Original poster

missbumpy · 06/09/2007 09:36

Good advice 20pence (for life in general!). Most people are quite easily distracted by deflecting the conversation onto them...especially if a bit of flattery is thrown in for good measure .

Don't get me wrong everyone. I'm well aware that things might not turn out as planned and I hope I won't beat myself up about it if I end up begging for all the drugs known to modern science or if things go wrong and I have to have an emergency CS. I've got quite a few friends who planned natural births and ended up with emergency CS/inductions/forceps/epidurals etc so I know that there's no point in being too rigid in my plans. Still, I want to have a plan A as well as some contingency plans

OP posts:

kitsandbits · 06/09/2007 09:39

My first birth I had nothing, not even gas and air, i was 20.

Same with DS2.

If you set your mind on it and close it to the possibility of drugs then its not even an option.

Thats how I did it

rmadley · 06/09/2007 09:45

hi missbumpy - that's exactly how I did it with my first - in a birthing centre - in the birth pool with gas and air. I'm hoping that I'll be doing the same with my second now that I'm pregnant again. Ignore anyone who says you can't do it - just as other posters have said.

Nbg · 06/09/2007 09:45

Natural births are fab.

I had drugs with my first and I hated that whole feeling of not being in control and not knowing what was happening.
With ds I had nothing at all and even had forceps at the end but it was still brilliant.
I was 100% with it when he came out and I could feed him happily myself.

I plan to do the same again this time too.

You sound like you have a very sensible attitude to the whole thing.
I wish you all the best and hope you get what you want

seeker · 06/09/2007 09:46

I had both of mine in hospital but with no pain relief except for a tiny bit of gas and air (not much because I didn't like it and it made it hard for me to control my breathing). And my babies were 9.9lbs and 10.6lbs. Go for it - but keep an open mind. You can change your mind at any stage and that's fine too. Good luck!

StealthPolarBear · 06/09/2007 09:57

missbumpy it sounds like you have the right attitude!
when are you due (sorry if you've already said)

Original poster

missbumpy · 06/09/2007 10:22

STB, I'm due on Oct 15th but since it's my first I'm preparing myself for it being a week or two late. It still seems like it's ages away but I'm sure it will creep up on me quite quickly!

OP posts:

cheritongirl · 06/09/2007 10:39

i did it too! At home with a pool and just G&A.. of course you don't know how you will respond to pain and i know at a few points in labour i begged to be taken to hospital and given drugs/cut open, but luckily had a dh and mw and doula who kept me going - thru a 27 hr labour! Was so glad that i did afterwards..
you CAN do it! Your body knows how to give birth - just try to make sure you are in a relaxed and safe environment for you, being scared and tense can just slow labour down.
Have you thought about having a doula? If you can afford it, i would sooo recommend it. mine cost £500 (not the cheapest but i liked her a lot) for 2 antenatal sessions, the labour and birth and a postnatal session - this was a HUGE amount of money for us but the best money i ever spent, worth a lot of holidays!! All the best to you

lizziemun · 06/09/2007 11:35

missbumpy

I had a natural birth with my 1st just gas and air, she was born at 39 wks and 9lb 4oz only had a small graze.

I say go for it, you just have to remember that for some reason women just want to frighten you when it comes to labour.

It sounds like you have the best of both you will be close enough to doctors should any problems occur.

georgiegal · 06/09/2007 12:32

missbumpy, you're not mad at all. I too, was hoping for a natural birth for my first baby, who was born last Friday. I found I could cope perfectly well with just gas and air and a tens machine. It was a wonderful experience. At no point was it so bad that I felt out of control and unable to cope. I know you have to keep an open mind as anything can happen but it's entirely possible to be drug free first time around and don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

noodleh63 · 06/09/2007 13:02

I had a natural birth with my first baby (born 21.08.07) TENS machine first and then in a birthing pool at the local hospital. My birth plan was deliberately vague as I didn't know how I would cope with the pain, but didn't even have gas and air. Pain's different for everyone, so I would take all comments with a pinch of salt. Go for it!

Original poster

missbumpy · 06/09/2007 14:36

georgiegal and noodleh63, did TENS really help then? I hadn't thought about getting a TENS machine. I'd just assumed it wouldn't work. Do you know if you can use them in a birth pool?

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