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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

First thoughts after childbirth?

95 replies

PRoseLegend · 10/02/2019 13:18

I'm curious about what went through people's minds when they gave birth/had a c-section, particularly with your first children.

For me, I remember being in excruciating pain as the baby's head came out, the midwife said "one more push", and the shoulders came out, and they said "You have a son!", popped him on my chest, and I looked into his eyes (wide open) and instantly the pain of birth was forgotten, I was just amazed at finally meeting this little creature that was from me,
I hardly noticed the team of people stitching me up, didn't notice I was haemorrhaging, I was just lost in his eyes.

Then that night as he truly woke up he began to cluster feed and cry a lot, and I remember thinking "Is this real? Am I really a parent now? Are his real parents going to come along any minute now and thank me for looking after him?"
I didn't really feel like a mum. Now I have a 2 month old and I've settled into the role much better.
But I still keep looking at his head and thinking "Golly, I pushed that melon out of me."

OP posts:

nos123 · 11/02/2019 00:28

Emergency c section and a few complications (temporary kidney failure from dehydration). After 25 hours in labour, 6 hours pushing and 30 mins of forceps I got to hear him cry. I immediately felt relief and then thought to myself “I’m going to die”. As soon as he came out I started vomiting violently and began shaking like a leaf, my whole body felt so weak. I didn’t even care about looking at him.

dellacucina · 11/02/2019 01:53

olderthanyouthink that's amazing! Your story speaks well of you but also suggests that we truly are programmed to handle this alone!

OP I also found it difficult not to push. The midwives saw I was holding back and encouraged me to do it. Unfortunately, my water hadn't broken and they seemed to lose track of this. I pushed ineffectively for about 2 hours before they manually broke my waters (enormous gush) and then it didn't take too much pushing after that.

But the instinct is there, and unmistakable!

MiniMum97 · 11/02/2019 02:06

Relief that it was over. No rush of love for baby. I think I was in shock for a number of days. Felt numb.

Grimbles · 11/02/2019 12:40

Being really uncomfortable as the cord was giving me a fanny wedgie when they put her on my chest.

GaryWilmottsTeeth · 11/02/2019 13:57

DD - "oh, you're a girl!" I had been totally convinced all through the pregnancy that I was having a boy

DS - was a CS, once he was (finally) out, I had a big PPH and my uterus was "boggy" according to the doctor and wouldn't contract back down. I remember thinking that "boggy" was definitely not a word that I wanted to be used to describe any part of me. And then I was mostly thinking "don't cough" because the G&A they gave me while they were trying to sort me out sent me into a huge coughing fit, and coughing while someone is trying to stitch your insides back together is a very bad idea.

GaryWilmottsTeeth · 11/02/2019 14:00

Also laughing at DD who was trying to latch on and suck her thumb at the same time.

Karigan195 · 11/02/2019 14:01

I had a reaction to the anaesthetic and was throwing up every two seconds so frankly it was ‘I don’t want to throw up on him’

cindersrella · 11/02/2019 14:16

My initial reaction...

Head crowned... Fanny's on fire

Cord around neck, stop pushing... kept pushing I can save babies life

Baby rolled out... wtf was that

Baby on chest... get this thing off me I'm going to drop it as I can't stop shaking

Started crying (me)... I couldn't believe how much I loved her and that I had just done all of that!

DoingMyBest2010 · 11/02/2019 14:20

Bloody hell, she's battered. The baby, not me (forceps).

barryfromclareisfit · 11/02/2019 14:24

Baby born at 08.40. At 10.30 the GP (present at the birth) visited me in my hospital room. I looked at him and thought “You’ll do! Come here!” I was surprised to find myself so up for it, newly stitched and less than two hours after giving birth.

tobee · 22/02/2019 16:06

23 years ago with dd I remember Dh burst into tears. My parents coming in and crying. I told everyone off:- "Oi! you're supposed to be happy!"

Than had to go off to theatre to stitch my 3rd degree tear, leaving dd with Dh.

MrsPworkingmummy · 22/02/2019 16:09

The amazing instant overwhelming feeling of love was incredible and I thought 'If I could bottle up how I feel right now, I'd be a millionaire'. Had two fantastic births, and I just loved my babies soooo much instantly.

MunchyMunchkin · 22/02/2019 16:25

On learning the baby was a girl - thank god I’ve only got to do that one more time.

Only wanted two kids but if they had been boys I would’ve had a third.

Embracethechaos · 22/02/2019 16:28

My first thought was, I don't know how to register her. Lol

MustBeAWeasly · 22/02/2019 16:35

'instantly the pain is forgotten' op you're one of those 😂

I remember dd was maybe a minute old I was in the pool holding her to my chest and my husband asked me if I was OK. I said 'you know how people say the second you see your baby the pain is forgotten'
DH 'Aw is it all just gone'
'fuck is it! It still bloody hurts. I've been lied to!!'

Birdie6 · 22/02/2019 16:36

First - OMG she's got perfect eyebrows ! And the love shot through me like an arrow.
Second - Wow that's a big willy he's got !

Springwalk · 22/02/2019 16:41

Holy shit it is a REAL live baby opposed to a nine month tummy bug and weight gain.

FartnissEverbeans · 23/02/2019 11:06

‘What the actual fuck just happened?!’

‘Ooh he feels weird’

‘Oh no he looks just like FIL’

I didn’t get skin to skin, he came out and then was removed immediately (for no reason, he was fine). I didn’t mind because I was so shaken up that I needed a minute. I got to see him eventually. It felt weird and unnnatural at first, but overnight the love came

hammeringinmyhead · 24/02/2019 08:05

"And... There's your baby!" Said the midwife, lobbing him at me like a rugby ball.

I said "Hello! That wasn't much fun, was it?" and DH was tearing up and telling me I did amazingly.

My first thoughts were that I couldn't believe how fast it was (three hour labour), that DS was tiny (he was, 5lb8oz) and he looked like E.T.! Then it was relief he was ok as they had been banging on about the resuscitaire for ages before he came out. Then it was the realisation that as I had had an episiotomy I now needed stitches.

thesuninsagittarius · 01/03/2019 16:07

Lovely thread! And mine are all in their twenties now but I've never forgotten: DD1, long labour, pre-eclampsia, forceps at 37 weeks, I looked at this skinny purple thing on my chest and said "hello! you tried to kill me didn't you?"
DS (nineteen months later) painful sweep at 40 weeks, six hour labour, baby in perfect position, no stitches, "Oh that was easy. Next!"
DD2(6 years later) crash section after 24 hours of weak, unproductive contractions. Had general anasthetic, woke up dazed and confused. Said "is she ok?" and on being told she was, fell asleep again. Woke later that day to hold her, I said "hello baby" and she looked right into my eyes as though she recognised my voice. AM a bit tearful now recalling it all!

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