Damage from a vaginal labour

[Lilonetwo]

I really don't want this thread to scare anyone but I would like some honest and balanced answers from people with experience of a 'natural' vaginal birth. Because I feel like damage after birth isn't very often discussed. (People often think, oh straightforward birth, no lasting complications, woman goes back to normal life. Which I'm aware probably isn't always the case?)

What damage (long or short term) did a vaginal birth do to you?

After both straightforward birth or a difficult birth

If you had a straightforward vaginal birth or a traumatic birth, did you have any problems; short term after birth, long term, with having sex, tears, incontinence, prolapse recovery time etc.

(I don't want to make this a VBAC Vs ELECC debate but for context this is the reason for my question.)

I only have one baby - Straightforward vaginal birth, short labour, no intervention, no tears, smallish baby. I was fit, healthy, not overweight, did my pelvic floor exercises.

17 months on and I am not recovered. I used to lift weights and loved running and exercise. I now have prolapsed womb, bladder and bowel. I have seen a specialist physio and Gynae and their advice is not to lift any weight or run or jump again if I want to improve my prolapse, which is devastating to me. Sex is sometimes awkward and painful. I have trouble pooing and have to support my perenium in order to poo properly. It was worth it and I’m coming to terms with it, but it’s not what I expected.

26 stitches a 3 day very painful labour with no sleep at 1cm and then 2.5hrs to 1cm to birth. My labia is healed as it is torn so my vagina looks deformed (though I don't care). My vagina at the top is much more stretched. I now get rashes etc... on my body which I wasn't getting before birth. Also a massive fear of pain which didn't exist before and a massive fear of birth which didn't exist before. I feel sick thinking about birth. On a positive note my periods have not been nearly as painful since giving birth. And not from birth in particular but I feel like I'm more stupid intellectually than I was before a baby. Overall I'm glad I have my baby and I still want more! She's divine.

Also I didn't leave the house for 6 weeks (literally) hardly got out of bed and I was in constant agony for 2 months and I couldn't walk hardly and had to pee in the bath which was still agony and had people tell me as I was a young mum I should have bounced back and had other people I knew who gave birth around the same time go shopping the day after! 1 Caesarian 1 vaginal but I was shocked because I literally could not walk and was in pure agony which only fully and mostly went away around 4 months. Also I had a horrible horrible pulled muscle clitoris thing which no one 1 spoke to understood which I got from doing a pelvic floor excercise I was told to do by a midwife which was excruciating and made everything a million times worse and meant I couldn't even pee without even more agony which made me cry and cry because it's impossible not to use those muscles involuntarily for things like peeing.

Also I ripped my bum from pushing so hard so now if my poo isn't sort it re rips it and shit gets into it and it's again pure agony. And sometimes it just opens anyway. I think there are a couple some on the inside of my asshole and some outside. When I first had them they were excruciating and I would hold my poo in for as long as possible but then I got creams to numb and make it go away and it did within a few days but it's constantly reappearing and it's hell. It's absolutely horrible. Called an anal fissure.

isn't soft*

Tbh it wasn't the cut I had during Labour that was the issue. .. after having 3 babies I've been left with overstretched fanny lips that quite frankly look horrific. I need labiaplastry

50 hr labour. 9lb 7oz son stuck. Eventually came out with episiotomy and forceps and a lot of drugs.

Couldn't sit on the loo for longer than about 10 seconds without excruciating pain for weeks.

Second week my stitches got infected - antibiotics.

First visit from health visitor at 10 days told me I should no longer be leaking urine - made me as midwife said it was fine.

Final sign off by midwife, told me my episiotomy had "healed open", so looks like extra hole in Perinium. Just something that fills itself in apparently.

6 week check told GP I thought I had a prolapse. She "wasn't sure" so referred me to gynaecology services - first appointment 71 days away.

9 weeks, still leaking urine, went to private woman's health physio (highly recommended by the way). Confirmed I don't have a prolapse and was actually beginning to heal quite well (go kegels!) Nd gave me some more exercises to try

11 weeks, first time I spent a day without a Tena lady pad and barely leaked and also first time I had sex. No pain, but vagina felt completely numb. Devastated. 12 weeks, second time sex and was actually quite good

Keeping my gynaecology appt in April just for a final check over. Pelvic floor still not to be trusted when sneezing, coughing or lifting my son.

Not having another child - huge part of this is due to the damage that has been done. Slowly healing, but not risking my physical health again.

Spontaneous vaginal birth at 35 weeks after slight placental abruption) Had previous emcs and elcs...was monitored in case needed cs but Ds was delivered after fairly easy labour- only had gas and air ( had steroid injection to mature his lungs but he needed no intervention and weighed 7lbs) was up and about 30 mins after delivery having a shower in stark contrast following his sister's deliveries
Had minor labial tear....

28 hour induced labour with pessary and drip. Two failed epidurals. After all that, only 10 minutes of pushing. DS was back to back but once he got in to position seemed to be fairly easy.
Grazing that required stitches but healed perfectly.

Straightforward birth, pushed too fast apparently leading to rectocele.

Just to say I had ventouse unsuccessfully followed by forceps for DD1. No problems of any sort other than tender bruising at the time.

Forceps with first, ventousse with second. No idea how many stitches or pushes (didn't know people paid attention to these things!)
Stitches weren't very sore, just needed paracetamol and ibuprofen with first for a few days and a day of paracetamol with the second.
The sorest part of recovery from DC1 was chafing - I had an epidural and catheter, so didn't need to go to toilet for maybe 8 hours after he was born and I suppose I was a bit numb down below and didn't realise how heavily I was bleeding and my pad/ bed etc were soaking. Took about two weeks for that to heal completely.
My advice: buy good maternity pads and change them often!

DS birth, vaginal birth which due to him getting stuck ended up in theatre with a quick spinal block and ventouse. Episiotomy and some stitches (no idea how many!) which while a bit sore for a while was healed in 2-3 weeks. It didn’t stop me walking about or doing anything really except a bit of wincing when I weed or sat down and put weight on it. I didn’t find a ventouse birth difficult in any way really, I was relieved that DS finally came out and everyone was very kind and reassuring.

Had emcs for first dd at 40+5 due to increased bp. Failed keelands forceps led to coed prolapse and crash section - poor dh thought he’d lost me and dd( she was in PICU for 48 hrs to monitor her brain function- she was by far the biggest baby there at 8lb 12
After her delivery I had pelvic x rays which showed asymmetry and so was offered elcs for future deliveries
I’m sure I had PTSD but never had any treatment for it and still have flashbacks 24 yrs later

First baby - spontaneous labour at 41 weeks, had most of my labour on maternity triage, mad dash in wheelchair to birth centre when fully dilated as the midwife on duty was clearly trying to hold out for shift change but didn't quite get there! Around half an hour of pushing and two small labial grazes. Back running 5 weeks postpartum.

Second baby - induced at 38 weeks for reduced movements. Took everything in the toolbox to get me into labour, 24 hour pessary, 2 6 hour gels, ARM and the Syntocinon drip. Relatively fast active labour, extremely fast second stage - 4 minutes and that was including the time to free a shoulder dystocia. I delivered from McRoberts position, had a minor PPH - and zero tearing. I have no clue how that happened.

^ First baby 7lb 8oz, second was 7lb 2.5oz. My kids only get big when they discover the boob!

to all the rough births. Some of these sound awful.

First birth, drug free, back labour. Dr used forceps before local anaesthetic had taken effect. I moved back (in excruciating pain) and got a fistula (unbeknownst to me at the time). I was discharged with a 3rd degree tear. 24 hours later it became apparent it wasn’t just a tear so back to hospital with my new baby for an operation that night. Next day a second operation to install colostomy bag. Obviously one of the high points of my life. 6 months later got the bag removed so back to hospital for a week to do that. Still have scars and was told never have a vaginal birth again. I never would anyway. I went on to have twins via c-section and it was the most calm and lovely experience ever. I would NEVER attempt “natural” childbirth if I could avoid it.

I was very fortunate to have 3 normal deliveries with no damage what's so ever. No tears, nothing

Your age at first birth and any previous history of bad tears both increase your risk of a tear at a second delivery. I had two ELCS due to prior perineal damage from IBD and was happy with my decision--so I am not your target audience, but I thought you may want those two bits of science:

www.newscientist.com/article/mg23130813-000-uk-doctors-may-starting-warning-women-of-childbirth-risks/

www.rcog.org.uk/en/blog/perineal-tearing-is-a-national-issue-we-must-address/

*Has anyone on here had Kielland Forceps for delivery?
*
I had them for my sons birth a month ago

Third degree tear that was not sewn up due to back injury during labour meaning I couldn't lie down. Tearing through the anus from the inside out.

The long term injuries are a mild prolapse and it looks awful downstairs.

I was advised by the hospital to pursue a complaint against the midwife but I couldn't bear to talk about it. They offered me surgery but again, I was too scared of things getting even worse.

Functionally I'm fine which I think is really bloody lucky.

God some of these are awful!

DS1
Back to back labour, left with a student mw for too long, 5 hours of pushing with no pain relief apart from gas and air, ending in poor DS going into distress unsurprisingly but eventually came out of his own accord after an episiotomy. My stitches broke down a few days later and I felt like I’d been hit by a bus for several weeks. The postnatal care I received was dire, as DS never had a weight gain problem the mws weren’t interested and discharged us early. I remember crying to DH in the shower that I’d lost all my dignity as I waddled around with a gaping hole. I was on antibiotics for at least 2 months, didn’t heal really for 4 months and couldn’t have sex until 7 months, honestly it was around then that I started to feel normal again. It was a massive shock, I had no idea that a vaginal birth could take so long to recover from.

DS2
Induced due to suspected cholestasis, couple of hours of contractions, waters broke, less than 30 mins later he arrived. Ironically he was in distress from it being too quick! Dr marched in and wanted to do another episiotomy but fab mw overruled her and I just had a 1st degree tear, no stitches. Have some v uncomfortable piles but he is only 4 days old and I’m feeling pretty good considering.

Pushed for over 3 hours. 2nd degree tear. After it healed it looked better than before! No incontinence.

Ive had 3 vaginal births and one of them was a 10lb baby. I had two births in one year. No tearing, no cutting. mostly straightforward. I had grazing with my first baby, thats all.

I do feel damaged. I have stress incontinence and vaginal wall prolapse, which I nearly had surgery for but am glad i didnt because of all the horror stories now about vaginal mesh etc

I think I just have to live with it. Kegals have only limited effectiveness and surgery is scary.
I currently am ill and am pissing myself every time I cough or sneeze. its fucking miserable.