Damage from a vaginal labour

[Lilonetwo]

I really don't want this thread to scare anyone but I would like some honest and balanced answers from people with experience of a 'natural' vaginal birth. Because I feel like damage after birth isn't very often discussed. (People often think, oh straightforward birth, no lasting complications, woman goes back to normal life. Which I'm aware probably isn't always the case?)

What damage (long or short term) did a vaginal birth do to you?

After both straightforward birth or a difficult birth

If you had a straightforward vaginal birth or a traumatic birth, did you have any problems; short term after birth, long term, with having sex, tears, incontinence, prolapse recovery time etc.

(I don't want to make this a VBAC Vs ELECC debate but for context this is the reason for my question.)

Vaginal birth with forceps/episiotomy and epidural.

Tore as well and cut, and nerve damage in both buttocks from the epidural.

Induced, traumatic birth (midwife missed flat lining CTG) baby literally ripped out with forceps. Extensive, rapid episiotomy because of severe bleed. Stress and urge incontience so episiotomy didn’t heal well. Fenton’s procedure after 18 months. Sex not possible in all that time as vagina partly sown shut. Waiting to see if now possible post Fenton’s but periods have packed up so think I’m unlikely to be able to have another baby now anyway. Learning: don’t have a trainee, don’t give birth around shift change, don’t expect help if you’re injured during birth. I was told off several times for my blood pressure being too high after birth, then had a seizure but couldn’t reach the call bell (tricky mid fit anyway). Apparently this was also my fault. So, nearly 2 years in my health and fertility are pretty compromised. I am very lucky my marriage isn’t and I try not to let it upset me most of the time.

thenecroscope so an easy labour does not necessarily mean no future complications
No, sadly not. In terms of prolapse, having a c-section also doesn't entirely remove the risk either, it's pregnancy that does the damage.

Tbf, in my 10 years of nursing, incontinence is something most people will have to deal with in old age. Both male and female.

DC1 induced due to pre-eclampsia, assisted delivery with ventouse and episiotomy. Felt like absolutely no pelvic floor afterwards and occasional leaking if exercising but gradually came back with some additional help from physio and lots and lots of kegels. Sex felt different afterwards but still good.

DC2 water birth with minor tear. Fairly quick delivery. Pelvic floor not too bad after this birth (just been trampolining today!) but five months on I am still very self conscious about sex, much less sensation down there and not sure it can feel good for by husband. Get quite upset whenever we dtd. Am hoping things will improve in long term but too embarrassed to talk to anyone about it at the moment.

I had a straightforward vaginal birth with no intervention, no tears or stitches. No issues with pelvic floor or incontinence. Had sex three weeks after dd was born with no pain or issues. I was very very lucky, I won't be having another. I religiously did perineal massage with almond oil from early on in pregnancy which may or may not have helped, I also stayed active in labour and did the pushing stage on my knees as I had read you were less likely to tear that way.

Natural labour but 4 hr pushing stage ended up on drip and then forceps.

Double incontinence, excruciating sex for 12 months, 18months or physio. Scar, stomach over hang, PND, PTSD.

spontaneous labour with both, uncomplicated birth with both.
Small tear not stitched with first, 8lb 8 oz, very sore first couple days but had sex before 6 week check and all good. Slight incontinence first 24 hours resolved by time I got home.
Second labour about 1 hour, 9lb 3 oz, no tear, slight stress incontinence in pregnancy but no worse after birth and improved quickly. No issues now.

I’m biased but forceps seem to be an issue from other posts I’ve read on this. I really think it’s tine they were binned in favour of safer alternatives. I don’t think it’s reasonable for people to just be left like @anothernamechangeforme and I (sorry if you don’t agree another)

frostiesmum I agree with you. A large proportion of 'bad tears' I have heard of are from mums who had forceps.

I really don't want to have a forceps delivery. I would rather have an elective cesarean (I already have the scar from that. Would be rubbish to have a c section scar from DC1 and end up with incontinence issues/bad tear/prolapse from a forceps delivery with DC2 )

My gynae has promised if we were ever to have any more (highly unlikely now) I should have a c section. She had three and gleefully tells me every time I see her that she has no issues. It’s a shame that sort of care isn’t open to the rest of us mere mortals who just have to hope for the best...

Thick meconium in labour, so transferred to delivery suite. Fetal distress so very quick episiotomy and forceps. Absolutely fine. Yes, I didn’t like the thought of them beforehand, but it honestly wasn’t that painful with just local. Sadly the skin stitches of my episiotomy broke down 5 days after, but it did go on to heal absolutely fine. Found lots of 5 minute shallow baths with lavender oil (I’m not normally into alternative medicine) really did help.

No problems with continence. Only issue with sex is a “heavy” feeling after but that’s down to pelvic congestion and I developed that in late pregnancy - it would be the same with a c section.

This is a slightly different angle. My mum had three forceps deliveries and I know she had to have at least one op to try to reconstruct things. They would offer CS for at least two of her deliveries now, but it wasn't an option in her day. She's now in her seventies and says she still suffers with her scars. She says as you get older your skin gets drier and the scars tighten and get harder, which is uncomfortable. She says it's hard to keep herself as clean as she'd like. She can also be a little faecally incontinent - just muscle weakness really. I know because I once had to catch the poo with - and I hope I'm wrong here - but my memory is it was the washing up bowl when she got caught by surprise one time and everything happened too fast. That was about fifteen years ago. She's always been very frank with me and we were able to have a giggle about it.
I have had two ELCSs, bit of an overhang but one neat scar and no discomfort. I did try for VBAC with the 2nd, but never went into labour and they wouldn't induce me at that time at that hospital. I too would rather not have the CS scar/overhang AND scarred vulva/incontinence. Good luck for your birth.

36 week induction with drip. Less than 30 minute labour. 2nd degree labial tear. Very sore afterwards and hips were very achey for about 2 weeks. No lasting problems except labia is permanently split

ELCS all the way 💖💖💖👌🏽

frostiesmum ok totally agree with you. There was lots wrong with my labour and I suspect it was the length of second stage as much as the forceps that caused the issue but they certainly didn't help.

Also there are C sections available to mere mortals you just have to be a bloody difficult woman .

Also the risks of incontinence and prolapse are less with C sections as far as my research goes .

@catsandkids78 technically, according to the NICE guidelines, you’re right.

BUT I think most first time mums are so pushed about the vagina route being ‘best’ that they get beaten into submission.

A friend of mine went through the counselling process to get a c section, then was told she could only have one if she delivered at a hospital miles from where she lived where none of her antenatal care had been delivered. My sense is that it is made as difficult as possible. It’s not a case of these are your options, you are an adult, what is your decision, in my experience it’s ‘this us the right route, you need to try that, then if you need it we’ll look at other things as an emergency’. I don’t feel that’s good care.

I wanted to ask for a c section when they said my baby was in danger and they wanted to try forceps but I was told no, forceps first. I don’t feel I was given a choice.

Straight forward vaginal delivery with a second degree tear 4 weeks ago. Relatively quick labour (12ish hours but first time mum and only 5 hours of that so bad I felt I needed to be in hospital!) but a longish pushing stage (1hr45ish).
I feel basically back to normal now, have done from about 3 weeks. Can't quite stop a pee midflow but can cough/sneeze with confidence! Haven't tried sex yet but that's as much because I'm exhausted from a newborn/co sleeping.

I was induced by having my waters broken at 40+12. My labour was 3 hours and very intense. Baby was in distress the whole time - track and trace wasn't working properly and didn't pick up my contractions.

Ended in a spinal block and forceps delivery - baby pushed out in 6mins.

I had a episiotomy and a 2nd degree tear (labial) which were both very sore and swollen for the first week but I had a lot of pain relief. Pain was gone by week 4, now at week 6 my episiotomy scar aches but only if I overdo it. Sex resumed at week 5.

So essentially no lasting damage.

I had a vbac , ended up with foetal distress again, so had ventouse and was cut which was horrible. Outside stitches fell out soon after and got infection, it was the worst experience of my life. Pelvic floor felt fucked. Plus I bled for months afterwards which I blame on the birth. Took 3 months to do the deed again and it felt a bit flappy to me. I really went to town on my pelvic floor exercises though and bought some weights. By 6 months everything was tight again and no leaking. I'm not sure about trampolines as I've never been on one, but I'm reasonably confident I wouldn't need tena lady. I don't regret the vbac as I did fully recover in the end, everything feels and looks the same. My fertility wasn't damaged and I know the delivery of baby 3 will be safer, however I'm not sure if I could handle another vbac. my dh wants me to have another vbac as he never understood the issues.
You must consider how many children you want as multiple csection are more dangerous. A second csection is very safe but can still go wrong.
Also a vbac is more likely to lead to intervention as you will be continuously monitored. Something to bare in mind.

2 vagina deliveries and the only left over problem I have is internal piles.

Thank you all for your info. You have all helped me a lot

I've delivered 3 babies vaginally, without intervention.

First baby- hospital, induced by pessary at 42 weeks, went into labour the next day. Total labour 2 hours 30 minutes, second stage 1 hour 10 minutes, no tearing, 10 days of gradually diminishing soreness and bruised feeling, no other damage. Had sex 3 weeks later, no issues.

Second baby- home, spontaneous labour at 41 +3. Total labour 2 hours 45 minutes, second stage 4 minutes, baby born in the caul, no tearing, genuinely felt as if I hadn't had a baby at all within a day or two. Had sex 10 days later, no issues.

Third baby- home, spontaneous labour at 40+4. Total labour 2 hours 26 minutes, second stage around 20 minutes, baby born with both hands on head, lacerations but no stitches. Generally sore for afterwards, didn't have sex until almost 6 weeks later. Coccydynia following the birth, started to ease off around ds3's 3rd birthday but can still be a problem.

Incontinence is not a problem but I have the symptoms of a fairly minor retocele. I don't know if that's in any way attributable to birth. It has very little impact on my life.

My mum had me by crash section (big horrible emergency apparently) and found the experience and recovery so awful that she insisted they do everything possible to avoid a section with her next baby. He was born vaginally, but delivering him needed keelans forceps and a full episiotomy and her recovery from that was absolutely horrendous. As big a fan of vaginal birth as I am, I think I'd rather recover from a section than from a forceps delivery.

I was completely convinced no baby could come out of my vagina before I gave birth. It would not be physically possible. I tried to tell a midwife with my first but thankfully she laughed and said all women think that!

DC1 DC2 and DC3 vaginal deliveries, episiotomy for first 2, tear with 3rd and stitches for all 3 (biggest baby was 10 pounds 5) 3 times labouring for 12 hrs ish but all went ok. Sore for 2-3 weeks, couldn’t sit on hard chair etc. Haemorrhoids/ bowels were more of a problem tbh and not severe (and have had as bad unrelated to pregnancy).
DC4 was vaginal delivery but no episiotomy or tear. For a couple of weeks I secretly wondered if I had been stretched with other 3 and that is why didn’t need stitches, but if I have I don’t personally feel any different!
Sex feels the same. I still have an iron bladder and can go 12 hours without passing urine (it’s my special skill). So 4 DC and no signs of any medium or long term damage.