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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Can people say something different about labour???

84 replies

Elisareven · 22/02/2018 20:22

So I just want some one to tell me something different......
I keep getting told it'll feel like period cramps and back ache......okay thats great but I was lucky enough to never really have cramps.during my periods so don't really know what that feels like.....and I've had back ache since I was 19 and fell off a horse which has beem progressively worsening my whole pregnancy.

The other one is "oh you'll know the pain is horrid" thats awesome but I went to school.for a week with an arm broken in 4 places before I realised I went to hospital because 'it didn't hurt that bad'.

I really don't know what anyone else can tell me but I feel so unprepared. I have no idea what to expect which makes me super nervous and then everytime I get a twinge Ifind myself wondering what is going on.

Take today for example. The baby has been moving loads, everytime I sit resting back on my sofa he is wriggling around like a gooden with feet poking out all over the place. At the same time I'm getting a sharp pain that feels like it could almost be in my kidneys. My hips are killing me so much so that I cannot put them together enough to cross one leg over the other. Everything feels swollen around thd pubic bine etc.

So really I guess I just have no idea what is going on and as a first time mum I have felt very much that 90% of pregnancy knowledge is left down to looking it up on the interent.

Has anybody else been in this position that could give me some advice? Or just tell me about their experiences??

OP posts:

EB123 · 22/02/2018 20:25

I think every first time mum is unsure what to expect. For me, i just knew when it was the real deal, not because of the pain, it was just some instinctive thing telling me that it was time.

AutumnalTed · 22/02/2018 20:28

Before you go into labour, before the contractions probably, you’ll have a big poo. Maybe feel a bit sicky, unwell, then you’ll have an achy tummy and you will know. I know it’s not what you want to hear, but that first contraction you’ll think “is this it” then it’ll happen again and you’ll think fuck.

norbert23 · 22/02/2018 20:28

Ok, I'll try! I gave birth with no pain relief and the closest thing I can describe it to is when you have cramps and diahorreah but if you had to hold it in, an intense, squirmy pain! What helped me loads was when my MIL told me that it was only ever 30 seconds of pain and by the time it peaked it was already waning, that made me feel loads better.
It's weird, you do go into a zone where you just want to get it out, it's literally like trying to shit a melon but you just get on with it. Your body knows what it's doing so just go with it! Good luck x

Mrsknackered · 22/02/2018 20:29

Have you ever had a kidney infection? The pain that I experienced in early labour was very similar to that.

Plumsofwrath · 22/02/2018 20:30

I had a “band of concrete” loosen and tighten around the widest part of my bump.

AutumnalTed · 22/02/2018 20:31

PP! That’s so true. I remember about 40 minutes before giving birth, I was between contractions and genuinely couldn’t remember what a contraction felt like, then I’d have another and obviously remember then just forget. I was snoozing between mine, you go very zen if you stay calm.

QforCucumber · 22/02/2018 20:31

I was expecting this horrid constant, excruciating pain, what I had was waves which lasted 4 deep breaths - the 3rd breath was the most painful, 4th was the ease and that was it until the next one a couple of minutes later.

Sleepysally · 22/02/2018 20:33

There is no feeling like it really but once it’s happening you just know.

To me it was like waves of cramp (not too dissimilar to leg cramp) moving down my body.

Then...Chinese burn on your foof...it’s nearly over at this point!

Pingu49 · 22/02/2018 20:33

I actually think it's hard to explain because it's a pain/sensation you forget. I remember it being sheer HELL but cannot at all describe or remember how it felt

student26 · 22/02/2018 20:34

I had complete back labour. Not even a twinge in my tummy. Felt like someone pushing their two thumbs into the small of my back as hard as they could. Bloody painful! I had to have an epidural in the end. Also, my birth plan went out the window.

PhelanThePain · 22/02/2018 20:36

You’ll have no pain. In fact, you’ll go for a nap and when you wake up the baby will have been born and bathed and dressed itself. Enjoy!

UsernameTaken2 · 22/02/2018 20:48

When I was induced I had lower back pain/pressure that felt like trapped wind. I never knew you could get labour pains in your back so I went off to the hospital shop to buy some rennies. When I told the nurse about my "trapped wind" and that a sleeve of rennies wasn't doing the trick" she replied "well they wouldn't my dear, because you've gone into labour"

Original poster

Elisareven · 22/02/2018 20:48

To everyone but that last comment which was funny but inhelpful; thank you for your help.
I'm trying to relax and just let it happen when it happens but that can be hard as I'm sure you all know.

Thanks again x

OP posts:

norbert23 · 22/02/2018 20:51

I found a free hypno birth track, that I listened to when I had a nap in the afternoon, was really nice and relaxing, I'm sure it had a positive effect and it sent me to sleep really quickly

justforthisthread101 · 22/02/2018 20:54

If you don’t figure it out, someone will tell you.

The first time, I was on the phone to my Mum who eventually said ‘Justfor, you’ve stopped talking to deal with a contraction three times in the last ten minutes. Time to go in love, good luck.’

The second time, I said to DH of a morning, ‘these aren’t Braxton Hicks.’ Spent a lovely day at home with DD1 as a last day as a three and at 6ish said, ‘you’d better call your mother. We’re going to need a babysitter’

Just go with it OP.

PhelanThePain · 22/02/2018 20:55

To everyone but that last comment which was funny but inhelpful

You asked people to tell you something different! and it made you laugh when you are stressed so not totally unhelpful. Relax OP. There is absolutely no chance that you will miss your own labour due to not recognising the pain.

Sprinklesinmyelbow · 22/02/2018 20:57

It’s like being run over by a car but weirdly, you’ll totally handle it. Some kind of primal instinct of the type that probably takes over when you really are hit by a car, but with less fun at that end!

rebelrosie12 · 22/02/2018 20:57

Yeah I couldn't really explain it either. But I knew when it was starting. I think most women just get a sense. You'll be fine.

JaneEyre70 · 22/02/2018 20:59

I can very truthfully say that I had had lots of Braxton hicks/twinges during late pregnancy but when I had a proper contraction, oh boy, I knew! It's weird but after a few, you just know. Also, there is this weird time in between contractions when everything feels fine, you're ok then another starts and you're like oh shit not again. But in between you do completely forget. It's a weird weird experience, but one that you will never forget and oddly enough, I never once felt scared of. It feels very primeval and natural. Just don't have any expectations, and you'll be fine.

formerbabe · 22/02/2018 21:00

Contractions never felt like period pain for me. It was more like, you know those stomach cramps you get immediately before you have diarrhoea? Just like that. Sorry if tmi there!

123bananas · 22/02/2018 21:00

I think this would have helped me understand it better if I had found it earlier.

katienana · 22/02/2018 21:15

It's like very very intense pressure. like being thumped from inside by a bowling ball. There are other signs of labour, you can usually see the bump tightening with contractions, you get a line going up your back, your waters breaking is usually a big clue!

spugzbunny · 22/02/2018 21:40

I'm so glad you asked this! I've been having the stomach / poop cramps for a few weeks so that description doesn't help! I've been pooping 3 times a day since like 30 weeks! So that's not a sign either! I've had back ache that feels like a wave for weeks. I can have been in labour this long! I'm kind f hoping it will hit me like a bus when it does kick off!

ijustwannadance · 22/02/2018 21:55

Chinese burn on your foof

The midwife poured a jug of cool water over mine at this point!

You will know when it's your time spugz.
Your body will be gradually preparing itself.

Athome77 · 22/02/2018 22:00

1st induced, really painful, had pethidine,
2nd 9lb + homebirth really easy only asked for gas and air but student couldn’t figure out how to turn it on.

Tattoo, so painful I fainted...

Everyone experiences it differently so just be open to whatever happens

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