Forceps delivery - will recovery get any better?

[oad2017]

Hi

I'm new to all of this but am essentially looking to talk to anyone who has been in the same situation as me.

I gave birth 7 weeks ago and ended up having an episiotomy & forcep delivery after only one contraction of pushing, as baby's heartrate dropped. He was a relatively big baby at 8lbs6ozs and my third stage of labour was only 5 minutes in total, so he was yanked out very quickly.

I've been left with urge incontinence both urinary & fecal, an anterior prolapse and what I can only describe as a gaping entrance to my vagina that collects air (sorry if this is all TMI!). l don't get much warning that I need to go so I really have to rush to the bathroom. Running water is my trigger that makes me feel like I'm going to pee myself - I manage to make it to the toilet the majority of the time but on the odd occasion where pee has started coming out then I just can't stop it. I can hold in normal stools for a very short period of time until I reach the toilet but have had a couple of episodes of loose stools where I haven't made it to the toilet, and once it starts coming, again I can't stop it. I also sometimes pass wind with no control. I feel mortified and so embarrassed. Every day I worry about going out if I haven't been to the toilet yet, in case I need to go when I'm out, or if I were to have a loose bowl movement surrounded by people who would hear.

I can mentally deal with the peeing issues and feel confident about it getting better with pelvic floor exercises, however my confidence with my back passage has been completely shattered and I'm feeling so down about it. I'm worrying that it will never get better and that I will never resume a normal life. I used to be very active, playing lots of sport and I'm even thinking about when I go back to work in 6 months and the thought is terrifying.

I am seeing a physio about my pelvic floor, and doing my exercises, but just wondered if anyone was in the same situation and can offer some reassurance that all of my issues should return to normal?

If there's anyone who's been through this and dared to have another baby, did the incontinence issues come back when you were pregnant again? I'd love to have two children but at the moment feel like there's no possible way I could go through all of this again, or risk causing more permanent damage.

Thanks in advance for any help!

Oh, and its the leaking and the anxiety that's the issue, though I'm finding my bladder is better than I think when it is put to the test!

Really useful thanks Bendydick

Thanks froofroo I hope it all gets better for you soon. The worrying about it all the time is so awful

I had ds2 after having my waters broken, all was fine until the very end when we were rushed to theatre for emcs. Managed to avoid that with episiotonyand forceps, ds was back to back and nearly 11lb. First vaginal birth.

I think there is a minor prolapse as just inside my vagina looks different. I also have the gathering air phenomenon, I feel like I need to press my hand against myself to stop it.

I can't wait long if I need to poop. I've so far never had to but pretty sure I couldn't hold it in if I needed too. Same with urine although that's getting better. Yes too to passing wind, and what a lot if wind I've had, no idea why or if it's related?

I'm 8 weeks post birth and haven't been examined at all. I think I'm going to make an appointment as thought it was fairly normal.

Wow what a big baby, congratulations and well done! I think your symptoms seem very very similar to mine - the only time I haven't been able to actually hold a poo in is when my tummy has been upset, the rest of the time it's just a bit of a rush to the loo. I also had a LOT of wind post birth, and as I couldn't control it I would be walking down the road with husband & baby just popping away, felt like an old lady! It was also pretty embarrassing having visitors round. The amount of wind is now probably back to normal and I am definitely better at controlling it, just not quite the same as pre-birth. Maybe it's worth you getting a referral from your doctor to a specialist to get checked out?

I think.i will thanks, the birth was pretty OK given the size and I was expecting some after effects, and since no one has looked or said anything, I thought it was pretty normal.

I wouldn't rate my chances of holding a poop in if I needed too. I've got a Gp appointment in a couple of weeks so will mention it all then.

Hi Nottalotta, yes, it's all related.

Faecal incontinence is loss of faeces (leaking stools) or of flatus (wind). Leaking stools can be indicative of a serious injury (3rd and 4th degree tears) to the anal sphincter (which normally acts as a seal).

Being unable to control wind after birth is quite common (although never mentioned in pregnancy books or antenatal classes of course . The [[http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/pages/ventouse-forceps-delivery.aspx NHS page ]] on forceps and ventouse give 13 to 27% of women suffering faecal incontinence after childbirth. This number includes both leaking stools and leaking wind. Only a small percentage of women leak stools.

It is embarrassing but will get better. I sometimes still pass wind involuntarily but probably no more than my husband after a beer and curry night .

Just like you, HCPs (one GP and one physio in my case) let me think it was "all pretty normal" even though I could see it wasn't (but lacked the knowledge to fully understand). If it was, why aren't we told about it before birth? The answer is that the subject is taboo.

Need to work on embedding links correctly...

I was told to expect lots of trapped wind after ds1 c section, but no one mentioned just lots of wind after my vbac
Much more than usual.

Hi! I haven't read through all the responses but glad to see you got some!
It's been a couple of months now so you maybe feeling better already but I just wanted to reach out and say I know exactly how you feel. It's so f@#king scary!! My ds was born end of Aug last year and I was in a bad way afterwards. Pretty much as you described - the faecal side of things scared me so much. I just couldn't believe it was happening to me... had been super fit and healthy all my life! Anyway, 10 months later and things are far far better. Like a million miles from those first few months. I would say physio helped a lot but all she did was show me how to contract my bum muscles which I did all the time and now it's not really an issue (have had no accidents). Just stopped breastfeeding so can't comment on that but have heard it helps. Also no second baby yet but am feeling hopeful!! Are you on facebook? There are some great support groups on there.

Thank you so much for checking up on me deebee! I'm now 4months pp and feeling better than I was but still not right. I haven't had any accidents since about 8 weeks pp so my confidence is slowly building and I don't tend to worry anymore about going out and where the toilets might be. I haven't had an upset tummy since that time though, and it's loose bowel movements that I worry about. I still feel like my bladder is quite weak and I haven't done any high impact exercise yet as worried about accidents and also still feeling a bit of heaviness from the prolapse. I've also still got pain from an internal tear which makes sex difficult. I do find it all a bit disheartening when I see friends bouncing around and feeling fine a week after giving birth