recovery after forceps delivery

[flamingoshoes]

I'm feeling quite traumatised about my labour and delivery 4 days ago. It's kind of hit today. I had a vbac (first was a section for breech) which ended after 28 hours with rotational forceps. Had the epiostomy as part of this but also had a 'complicated' second degree tear and lost a lot of blood. I've also been left with hopefully temporary bladder incontinence so have come home on a catheter for 10 days.

Reading my notes and from the bits I picked up during discussions in labour I got to 10cm but baby was back to back and had cord round neck which was acting like a bungee with him moving in and out of the top of the birth canal. So despite lots of good pushing I just couldn't get him to descend. There is failure to progress past second stage written in my notes which has just made me feel a bit sad. I don't think it helps that my milk has come in today, i'm a blubbering wreck and had an awful no sleep stay on the post natal ward until yesterday.

I now have to empty wee bags, can't sit down and also have a new baby and a todder to care for. I know It will get better I guess this is a place to let it all out....

Pinguina thanks for your story what an inspirational person you are to have come through all of that. Sorry i've not been back sooner been dealing with a colic baby and a toddler with an ear infection.

I saw the physio today and she has told me to expect it to take a good 12 months to recovery and we are not sure of what recovery consists of until regular work starts (need more time for healing before this can begin). Also had the health visitor visit she has been amazing and managed to sort out incontinence pads and an appointment with the district nurses so I can have them supplied rather than having to buy as not ideal having the extra cost while on maternity. I must admit I did cry when I saw them and how big they are.

Mentally feeling quite vulnerable I think lack of sleep and inability to leave the house without having someone take me somewhere is getting me down. Finding day to day tasks hard as even something as simple as changing a nappy causes me to wet myself when I turn the tap on to get warm water.

Thank you all again for all your comments and support.

I had a forceps delivery too and was made to have a catheter and could not stop crying at all. I was in horrendous pain and absolutely hated that damn wee bag. So you have my total sympathy.
I had to be readmitted because of the tugging of the bag. The midwifes organised a urologist to come see me and she recommended a tap instead of the bag. That tap was a God send. Still horrible but it made things more bearable.
I'd ring your ward and ask them about it if I was you.

Have just come back to have a re read of the thead and all the brilliant advice. I'm 9 weeks post delivery now. Doinguch better physically the epiostomy scar has healed but is still painful but I can now sit very gently. Am still managing to breast feed fully which has now become a little easier now I can sit. My back problems continue but have a brill chiropractor who is helping sort them out. I felt able to start driving again a few weeks back which had improve my mental health no end as i'm able to get out despite it often being a total mission with a baby, a toddler and my dodgy bladder that likes to empty at random moments with no warning (stepping in a puddle getting out of the car the other day and the sound of rain on the car windscreen) and bowels that give me very little warning and i just am glad i've always been at home when has has happened.

Still very incontinent which has caused some awkward situations but my health visitor has been brilliant at sorting out a district nurse referral and continence products. The physio has given an estimate of a year to try and regain some normal level of function with continence (i'm a one out of 5 for pelvic floor function and still not healed enough internally to start more regular work)

My gp is trying to push that I have pnd but i'm convinced I don't. I feel very traumatised by the birh still but if I don't think about it then i'm fine and happy and not crying. I told her that I thought I was doing quite well considering what i'm having to cope with at the moment and just because life is difficult doesn't mean i'm automatically depressed and need medication.

Unfortunately ds has very bad reflux which is awful, my ds1 didn't have this and days and nights are now spent holding ds2 upright to stop projectile vomiting and choking and gagging. Just waiting for the day when life becomes a bit easier!

Feels like it has been months rather than weeks since I gave birth but we are doing OK and managing as best we can every day. My friend gave birth the other day a natural birth very quick and no intervention required. It was enough to make me cry again about my experience and I will be getting some counselling to talk things through at some point in the future but i'm not ready to face it yet.

It was so nice to come back and read all the lovely messages that helped me so much at the time when I was feeling at my worst.

Hi! I told you you'd drive before I did!

Glad to see thing are (slowly) improving. Not glad to see your baby has reflux. I hope it doesn't last too long.
X

Just seen your update, not commented before. Glad to see that you are managing so well only 9 weeks after the birth. It is early days. Be gentle on yourself.

I didn't have the same experience as you instead I had failed ventouse and forceps with Dd1 then EMCS, which took six months for my insides to feel like they were not going to fall out of me when I did anything too strenuous. I also had an Emcs with dd2 (failed vbac and ventouse).

With ds I had an elcs with emergency hysterectomy (begun whilst awake) and bladder surgery with a catheter for 2 weeks. It is 2 years since he was born and I can honestly say that I am so much better now. I think I did have a form of ptsd after the birth, getting out of the house helped as I had flash backs. In the end that did make me depressed, but I didn't take anti-depressants instead I went back to work in a new role helping sick children that helped pull me out of my head. I also spoke to someone at a birth trauma helpline who just listened, that helped me as the counselling through the GP never came through. Bladder wise I still pee more frequently and do leak occasionally when squatting, sneezing, coughing or laughing, but much less than before.

Re: ds2's reflux is your GP supportive of you trying anti-reflux medication such as ranitidine for it? Lack of sleep makes everything seem so much worse.