My bits hurt :(

[millysimmons]

I had a forceps delivery on the 7th october, lots of stitches & bad piles. Stitches feel OKish at moment, piles are giving me hell but my bits feels like they've done ten rounds with mike tyson. Can anyone let me know how long I can expect to feel like this? at times I feel like I'm walking like a cowboy, othertimes it feels OK.
The MW & HV think I should be thinking about sex but at the moment nothing is further from my mind....or should I say I'd like to be able to but just scared, al most like loosing your virginity again!!is this normal?

I would politely tell her to sod off and just get the baby weighed and hot foot it out of there .. or see another one. This hv is horrid - a mw tried to get me to consider contraception in hospital ! and recommended the sharp pokey things that you can't even bear to think about ..

erm i'm referring to coil ..

TBH , i don;t take issue with contraception being discussed , especially as misconceptions(!) still occur about b.f & pregnancy and not being fertile just after having a baby

i do absolutely object to women being told by others when they should feel ready for sex!!!! far too personal and intrusive and yet another way of making hormonal and tired women feel even worse!!!!!

This soon after birth I was still dreading going for a wee.

Rubber ring ruber ring rubber ring! You feel like a wally but it is so nice to sit down comfortably again.

Salt baths as well- really nice and relaxing and help your bits to heal. I had a 3rd degree tear and I healed really well and quite quickly using the above methods - however, trampolining has never been the same again!

As for advice on sex just try to ignore the hv - they are mad! I had a midwife talking to me about contraception 2 days post delivery -what a joke! It took me months because all I could do was to associate my bits with pain. The memory does fade though and things are back to normal.

I am sorry you are still in so much pain - even though it must feel like it is an age, you are still only 3 weeks post delivery so don't try to be super woman. Is there anyone who can help out around the home with childcare etc and give you a rest?

My m/w suggested tea tree oil and lavender in a bath 2-3 times a day to promote healing. Managed to do it about 1 or 2 times a day... Lots of people swear by arnica, but don't apply the cream to any broken skin! I was told to use arnica cream for stitches, didn't read the label properly and lived to regret it dearly - infection, antibiotics and large doses of pain killers!! I couldn't walk properly for the first 5 days until the m/w cut some extra tight stitches... Awful!!

My m/w said not to use one of the rubber ring cushions on the basis that it made all the blood pool in your sensitive bits, ie. the bit on which there is no pressure, so can't comment on whether or not they are any good... It will get better with time...

My stitches were so tight I could barely climb stairs, never mind sex! When my gynaecologist watched me hobbling about, he cut them, my skin was very dark blue. They'd probably meant well, I was told after the birth they were going to stitch me up nice and tight so I wouldn't have problems 20 years down the track. Was much better once the gynaecologist removed some of the stitches.

pain/piles definitely went away 100 percent though if that's any consolation! Can't remember now how much time it took.