41 wks, been in early labour for 2 wks & no one will help!

[millysimmons]

I've been in early labour for 2 weeks now & getting pretty fed up! Have tried everything to get this babe out! Am also having problem with due dates which the consultants are still arguing about. I was due 13th sep, they say 2nd oct- only thing they are baseing their date on is 20wk scan. I'm using LMP, implantation bleeding, pregnancy test dates & other scan dates all which concour the 13th sep.
Main problem is threefold:
1)How long are they goinng to leave me before they help me. By my dates I am 41 weeks now but not by theirs so they wont help yet.
2)Have asked for a 2nd opinion from the consultant ut cant see him till next thursday so am worried about health of baby till then
3)Have been told they wont induce me because I have severe SPD & even though they where going to induce me originally at 38 wks they have now changed their mind due to some new research- that I cant find anywhere!
Does anyone have any ideas at all? Am considering changing hospital which seems a little drastic.
Only reason I have been told that the early labour is taking so long is baby is back to back & contractions arent strong enough to get him going & he keeps moving. So i get to about 45 minutes of good strong contractions & it all stops slows down.
Am really at wits end & its eating away at me as I really dont know what to do or who to get help from.

Milly, sorry you're having such a rotton time. That is a HUGE date discrepency, but if the scan dates are correct then your baby isn't baked yet, really.
Do you know what I think? I I'm not a midwife or doctor but I have had the experience of having gone through' 5 pregnancies,labours and births and from the sounds of things you are NOT in early labour but in PRE labour which is different. I would say that pains you are feeling are NOT contractions but Braxton Hicks which are like practice pains. Braxton Hicks come and go and can be very frequent and very strong in the last few weeks of pregnancy.
Mine used to be so stong that they would keep me awake for hours during the nights only to disappear by morning. True contactions do not stop and they do not go away and they get stronger. Mine used to get so stong at times that I wasn't sure whether this was the real thing and I'm experienced at this, so it can be very confusing and misleading.
My advice to you would be to let the baby come when it is ready. Use the pains as breathing and relaxation practice.
I know spd is really awful, I have had it pretty badly at the end of my pregs, not to the extent of being in a wheel chair, but I have not been able to move very well at all.
Try and be patient, it is hard I know but the best thing by far for your baby is to let it come when it is ready. YOUR BABY will decide when it is baked anough and this has nothing to do with yor EDD or your LMP or you scan dates,so try and forget those. Best of luck.

hi millysimmons i know how you feel i was in early labour for 5 days as my ds was back to back i didnt know this till my 3rd trip to the hospital and was told i would have to wait till the baby had turned on reading threads on hear kneeling on all fours and rocking is ment to help baby turn rasberry leaf tea curry chilli con carne and sex are all ment to help have your waters broken? coz if they have the hospital cant leave you too long coz of the risk of infection i would go to the hospital and refuse to leave untill they did something two weeks is taking the mick!

can you do anything to turn the baby?

I bet it's really hard if the SPD is bad, but can you spend some time on all fours? or leaning over a birthing ball?

Hopefully it will turn the baby round and help things along a bit.

x-posted nuttymum.

Hm....tbhm they nust be pretty sure that the 20 week scan is the one with the right date, as otherwise they would be bugging you by now about induction...probably not what you wanted to hear!
Am not usually one to go with what the doctor says...but well....it would be just very unusal if they would take the risk to go over edd by so much without being concerned, iykwim!

Millysimmons, totally sympathise! I'm 40wks + 3days and I am so fed up! Although there is no confusion with my dates, the false labours I have been having for the past week are driving me mad! A week last Sunday was the first one, Contractions started at 2pm, 30 mins apart, got stronger and closer ending up 5 mins apart. I had warm baths and kept moving around because I was told if they are Braxton Hicks, they would go away. They didn't go away, they got more and more intense. Convinced I was well in labour, we all got excited, then at 7pm....nothing! It all stopped!

Last Thursday, it started at 4pm, same thing, got in the bath, they got stronger! Struggled to get out the bath, couldn't stand up straight! Got to 5 mins apart and at 8pm....nothing!

I couldn't believe it! DH was stuck in traffic on the M1 over 2hours away in a right panic and all for nothing!

Saturday, 3pm in the middle of Morrissons, started again, this time an hour apart, by 5pm they were 25mins apart, by 9.30pm they were between 3 and 5 mins apart! Surely this was it, we all thought! Sorted babysitter out for DS1 who was fast asleep in bed, had a bath, just thinking of going in to hospital and ....nothing!

Midnight it all stopped again! I cried my eyes out! All the pain is worth every twinge when you have a baby at the end of it, but this is ridiculous! 3 times now we've been convinced she's coming, and 3 times she's changed her mind! DH says it's because it's a girl and we can never make up our minds!

3 days late, tried all the tricks from aromatherpy to fresh pineapple, curry to castor oil! She's just too dam comfy in there!

As for being back to back, my DS1 was like that, apart from chronic back pain, I had no probs until I was in labour, no false alarms or anything. He was a week late, it was a long labour (went into hospital 8pm and he was born 6.58am) and all the pain was in my back, but once it started that was it.

Hopefully, if your dates are right, it'll happen very soon, keep your chin up, keep as active as you can, although I appreciate this isn't easy with SPD and maybe try reflexology, apparently, so I've just found out from a midwife, having it from 30 weeks onwards can help reduce labour time and pain, help with SPD and help your post natal recovery.

Take care and good luck.

Oh, I nearly forgot, reflexology can also turn the baby! So I was told!

Braxton hicks can go on for hours at the very end and they can very easily be confused for the real thing. But they are really helping your body to limber up and open up so that's a good thing.

I thought they where BH too but was told 2 weeks ago it was the real thing, get DP home as he was away in he RN & baby would be here very shortly. Even have it written in my notes!!! Feel a right pratt because I think they could well be BH too, DP rushed home & nothing has happened!!
Sure I will have a baby at some point- question is when!!!!!!!

Milly how did they know they were the real thing? The real thing doesn't stop. I know how absolutely awful the waiting game can be, time warps, you're uncomfortable etc. It's so disappointing when you think this is it and it's not. Who knows when your baby will come? Your baby will decide when it feels the right time. By the sounds of things your body is really getting ready and it's much, much better to let it practise and do its warm ups so that when it does finally go into labour it will be ready. Just hang on in there and write on here when it gets hard and you feel really down.
My third child was three weeks late and that was such a hard time for me. I used to weep daily and wake up in the mornings and think 'still here then'. But she did come and came out fine.

A due date from a scan at 20 weeks will be less accurate than one done earlier. If you had an earlier scan that agreed with your LMP I can't understand why they changed it on the basis of the 20 week one.

Have you spoken to your community midwife about your concerns? What does she say? If you haven't spoken to her then I would try phoning. If you're really concerned you can phone delivery suite and ask to come in and be assessed. If you still feel that you're being fobbed off then contact PALS at the hospital. Try not to worry too much about the baby being overdue - if you are 41 weeks then the chances are you will go into full labour pretty soon and the actual risk to the baby is very small. Many women aren't induced until 42 weeks and lots will decline even then and still have healthy babies once they do go into labour.

If you're baby is back to back then you might want to try some exercises to get him/her in a better position which might get things moving a bit.

Hopefully though you're not reading this because you're already in labour!

Sorry, that link didn't work, try this

Can I just say, that I agree with daisy there, that usually a earlier scandate is more accurate...I believe until about the 9th week embrypis seem to grow at the same rate...but that is why I believe tyhat, if they really think the 20 week scan is more correct there might be something to it...tehy wold not risk overdue, they rather risk not ready cooked usually!

I read in Dr Miriam Stoppards book, The Complete Guide To Conception Pregnancy and Birth (very good book if you've never read it) Braxton hicks will go away if you get in a warm bath or if you walk around. Normal contractions will get more intense. Also, BH are irregular, they can be all over the place, normal ones get closer together, but never further apart.

The ones I've been having get closer, more intense, worse when I walk around and don't go away in the bath. For some strange reason they suddenly stop after several hours!

I never had Braxton Hicks with my others, but this time I had them around 30wks. What I've felt over the last week is not the same as what I felt back then. Who knows!

Having pains now, probably another false alarm!!!

hope you're feeling a bit better milly!
I had similar with first child and it was a real pain in the arse - contractions and pains that then just petered out...
However, when I finally got to the point of being induced a) my cervix had dilated a bit so the contractions must have been doing something and b) when my real contractions started I realised that I hadn't been in labour before.
Try and rest as much as you can, and speak to your MW. If you're really struggling you could always phone the hospital for advice.

Miriam Stoppard should be taken with a big, big pinch of salt. It is not true that Braxton Hicks stop when you get in a warm bath! Braxton Hicks can go on regularly for hours no matter what you do!!!!!

Yep, and often labour contractions will ease off for a while in a warm bath before getting more intense. And walking around was what used to set off very uncomfortable BHs for me!

Miriam Stoppard is full of crap.

The only difference I could find between BHs and early contractions is that contractions hurt and BHs don't.

It's not at all uncommon for early labour (i.e. before 3cm) to stop and start over several days. 2 weeks is pretty unlucky though .

Still here had my second opinion today from consultant & we've agreed around now is my due date but cant really pinpoint it so will try not to get too hung up on it now. Placenta & fluid all fine & baby doing well, still growing on hte 95th centille umm!!
Anyhow babies head not engaged anymore & contractions be they BH or not have stopped. MW at hospital said real thing, one in community said maybe BH- who knows but looks like baby has decided to stay put for a while!!!
Now I know he's OK & have seen a reallly sympatetic consultant feel loads better.

Still here had my second opinion today from consultant & we've agreed around now is my due date but cant really pinpoint it so will try not to get too hung up on it now. Placenta & fluid all fine & baby doing well, still growing on hte 95th centille umm!!
Anyhow babies head not engaged anymore & contractions be they BH or not have stopped. MW at hospital said real thing, one in community said maybe BH- who knows but looks like baby has decided to stay put for a while!!!
Now I know he's OK & have seen a reallly sympatetic consultant feel loads better.

Glad for you Milly, let us know when he arrives

Milly, can I just say, a non engaged head really doesn't mean anything...some Baby's just engage really late, i.e. just before they are ready to come out!
I know it must be ahrd to keep cheerful when the Baby is overdue, but well...just hoping it will happen for you soon
Best of luck...oh and great that you are feeling a bit better about things now

Find a reflexologist. I had one for my last babe.
I was determined to have a home birth with previous 2 DDs. Docs wouldn't allow it with first and with 2nd I was 2 weeks over so had to go in to be induced.
My reflexologist was a former midwife and I'd been visiting her for the last month of my pregnancy to help with insomnia. She refused to do anything radical (if you can be radical with reflexology!) until after my due date, but when that came and went she gave my feet a megga fiddle and the baby popped out within 12 hours after less that two hours of labour! The labour was a breeze and I got my home birth.

if you are in london i can recommend 2 lots of independent midwives who may be willing to assess you, which may give you more leverage with the nhs. sounds awful! i feel for you.

It's good if they stay in. The longer the better, the better they grow, the healthier the baby. If it were in danger they'd removed it. I kept my twins in there until 40 weeks away from compulsory 38 week induction by doctors, by having my own midwife behind me (and regular checks for their safety) and I'm sure we called them the happy babies because they came out in their own good time when they wanted to, not wrest out early because it suited the convenience of a doctor etc. I think whe they're born when they're ready they're much calmer and happier, bigger, healthier too. In a sense you're lucky although you may not feel like that at the moment.