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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Is childbirth like doing a poo in public???

92 replies

Morningnewspaper · 17/09/2006 10:12

My first baby is due in December and I am now utterly convinced that childbirth is like doing a poo / having a dump in public. Is this true??? Not being used to doing this sort of thing with an audience, could throw my style off a bit. Is this the case and do you have any advice???

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marthamoo · 17/09/2006 10:46

When you get to the pushing stage you do push in the same way as you do when you're doing a poo - I wish someone had told me that when I was having my first. I was so paranoid about actually pooing in childbirth I tried to push 'neatly', and channel the pushing down the birth canal - wasted a lot of energy pushing like that. You've just got to go for it and push with everything you've got - and the bearing down is a similar sensation to pooing.

But, honestly, once you're at that stage you won't give a sh!t.

marthamoo · 17/09/2006 10:49

Oh and by the time I was about to have ds1 I had my legs up in stirrups with 4 midwives, a consultant, a junior doctor, my dp and my Mum in the room...didn't care. If they'd asked could they bring in a Welsh male voice choir and a film crew I wouldn't have objected. You are so focused that the people around you almost don't seem real.

sallyrosie · 17/09/2006 11:05

Re the pooing thing: if you think about it, that baby's head is BIG and its going to fill pretty much your whole pelvis on its way out. Your rectum gets squashed by it. If there is any poo in your rectum its going to get squeezed out as the babys head moves down. There is nothing you can do about it, you won't necessarily notice and you won't care!

Blu · 17/09/2006 11:06

I'm sure this is all making Morningnews feel so much better.

MNP - Actualy, labour was v private, the mw's enabled me to feel very much 'it's my body, I'm in charge', and everyone is involved in supporting you. They were also very discreet and i never felt unneccessarily exposed.

In the end, I did need a ventouse delivery, which did feel like I was a bit of a major attraction. BUT everyone was so professional and businesslike about it, I was keen that my baby get the best obstsric help available to get him out, and i would say that it's more akin to having a smear or colposcopy than a poo. i.e medical help.

And as it happens, i didn't poo - but apparantly mws are very experienced and dicreet in dealing with this, too.

Don't woory. it won't help, and you may well have no need to.

SoupDragon · 17/09/2006 11:07
VeniVidiVickiQV · 17/09/2006 11:08

no, its like pushing a watermelon out your fanjo and having a poo in public.

marthamoo · 17/09/2006 11:11

I know, Blu - always promised myself I wouldn't 'do' birth stories to expectant Mums after being on the receiving end so many times

But she did ask - and ds1's birth was OK, despite being quite high intervention. I think the best piece of advice I could give is not to have firm plans about the birth but to go with the flow.

Original poster
Morningnewspaper · 17/09/2006 13:41

Crikey - I look away for 5 minutes . Thanks ladies - mmmmm - I rest in the knowledge that I clearly won't give a FF!!

Am I being asked politely to change my ID - I'm having such trouble feeling like me at the moment anyway, that it probably wouldn't make any difference.

OP posts:
Baretoes · 17/09/2006 13:48

My new ID

chocolatemummy · 17/09/2006 13:51

oh honey its much worse than that!

charleymouse · 21/09/2006 11:20

Hi
I sat on the toilet for most of my labour because it does feel as though you want to poo. Every time I stood up to walk around I felt like I needed to poo so sat on the loo just in case. So be prepared for this feeling, it doesn't matter though if you do, the anticipation of it is horrific but you really will NOT mind afterwards and you will wonder why you were so bothered.
I had a homebirth and was on my own for most of it (by choice and also as downstairs loo not very big) until hubby helped support me whilst I stood up and midwife sat on floor underneath to cath DD. Apparently I was "in the zone" as my DH refers to it. Yes I did poo but I only noticed after I had given birth and was flushing the loo, where my waters had also been deposited.
I also thought you had internal examinations every five minutes but I only had 2, one whilst in labour so the MW could check how far on I was after she had arrived, and one after the birth to check everything was alright down below. (it was just a slight graze.) So you don't necessarily have to be on show all the time. My only piece of advice would be to stop at home and it can be as private as you want!
You are sort of in a focused state of mind when the only things that you care about are getting through the contractions, the pushing and then falling in love with your baby.
Don't forget you generally only hear the horror stories as the good ones don't make such interesting reading.

expatinscotland · 21/09/2006 11:22

It's like being disemboweled, IME.

HuwEdwards · 21/09/2006 11:22

It's like doing a poo the size of a bus out of the eye of a needle.

But hey enough of us have done it - more than once.

Pruni · 21/09/2006 11:23

Message withdrawn

Bozza · 21/09/2006 11:27

Well with DS I had DH and 2 midwives present for the actual birth - although I think others did attend during labour.

With DD who was born at home it was one midwife and DH.

And let's face it you are probably not going to do a poo in private for a few years now anyway. Young children don't believe in allowing mothers that privelege.

Clary · 21/09/2006 11:32

lol at the welsh male voice choir being in the room martha!
It?s tru tho. I always say I was (for once) so focused on one thing, that I wouldn?t have cared if someone came in and said the Queen had died (I?m a journalist btw, not a mad royalist).
Yes, it is like doing a pooh, one the size of a watermelon. Not in public tho, mine were all relatively private, just one MW and DH.

ginmummy · 21/09/2006 11:37

The beginning of labour for me was like low down backache with the feeling of severe diarrhoea, a low down dull ache that couldn't be mistaken for anything else (I was induced at 36+6 weeks and in labour for almost 24 hours). I had an epidural so I didn't feel a great deal down there afterwards but talking to the other women on the labour ward before I had ds and they said it felt like they were pushing a huge poo out and they were scared they were doing just that all over the midwife. It's different for every woman and even if you poo or wee it's nothing to worry about or be embarrassed of.

sugarfree · 21/09/2006 11:38

I had a crash section at 6cm with ds1 and frankly there wasn't a member of staff at the hospital who didnt see my fanjo that afternoon,quite a few other patients,visitors,porters cleaning staff too I expect as I was charged through main reception with my arse in the air on the way to theatre.I distinctly remember someone shouting "Have we got a blanket to put over her?" so I was uncovered for at least part of the trip!
Did I care?Nope.

ginmummy · 21/09/2006 11:39

Fanjo - fantastic word! Must use that in future.

expatinscotland · 21/09/2006 11:42

I had an epidural w/my first, so I didn't feel all that pressure down below.

So w/my second, I had NO idea how close I was to delivering w/DD2.

It started to hurt very badly en route to hospital, and I could no longer stand up and walk.

Midwife comes out and says, do you feel like you have to push?

I said, 'I feel like a need a giant dump'.

They whisked me into the delivery suite, where i was found to be 9cm dilated.

MadamePlatypus · 21/09/2006 11:47

Apparently there were lots of people in the room at one point during my labour (DS heart rate dropped and they were trying to set up an epidural). I was a bit high on gas and air so didn't notice. I wouldn't have cared if the Queen had died, and I wouldn't have cared if the Queen had been invited into the delivery room.

Being pregnant/going through labour, is the beginning of a long period of time when you become completely unrevolted by bodily functions. The only problem is you have to remember other people's sensibilities sometimes.

Elibean · 21/09/2006 14:54

MadamePlatypus, thats very true..and it lasts a while, that...still to remember waking up to the fact that I'd been sitting expressing milk whilst watching TV, in the bay window of our street-level sitting room, with the lights on in Dec/Jan, curtains open, at all times of the day and night.
Just looking neighbours in the eye again now, and dd is nearly 3

ginmummy · 21/09/2006 15:02

And apparently postmen are very used to seeing the breasts and bodies of new nursing mothers - after you've had your ankles behind your ears and your fanjo on display for all to see you just don't care if they see a bit nipple at 6am.

Morningpaper - honestly don't worry about it. I know it's your first baby and it's a fear of the unknown but bodily functions are part of the birthing process and it's nothing the midwives haven't seen before. You'll be fine.

sweetkitty · 21/09/2006 15:04

MNP - I was shocked about how anal the pushing stage felt, like the baby is coming out your bum closely followed by all your internal organs. I didn't poo with DD1 did with DD2, DP said the MWs were oh so matter a fact about it. I become so lost in the labour I barely know who is in the room.

But it's only a few short hours then you get to see and hold your baby and theres no feeling like that on earth. OK you will have no modesty left but afterwards you will feel like superwoman and it will all have been so worth it.

Go into it with an open mind everyones labour is different, you won't know you you will react once things kick off.

PinkTulips · 21/09/2006 15:27

the only thing going through my mind was 'PUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH, fuck, ow, PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, fuck, ow, PUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHH, fuck ow....... o thank god thats over, hang on, whats that mw doing with her finger up my, o fuck, PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH, fuck, ow............'

tbh, you not really aware of the people in the room except for vague sense of relief that someone is there to catch the baby as the thought of leaning forward after its born to pick it up just seems like way too much effort.