Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

What words, phrases or ideas REALLY helped you during labour?

104 replies

Gemmitygem · 18/07/2006 06:55

Am trying to collect a list of motivating phrases or tips or mantras which people have found to be effective, or any visualisations (e.g. waves, marathon running, mountain climbing etc).

Have heard ones like 'take each contraction as it comes and imagine it's the last', a woman who swore by encouraging her cervix by shouting 'You go, cervix!' and saying 'open, open' etc.

or it could be what was most encouraging that your dp/dh said to you, or midwife, which really urged you on?

Very grateful to know what worked for others! (first baby due in 12 weeks and want to be prepared)..

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

riab · 20/07/2006 20:59

No option - when I said ' i can't do this' and to be told if you want the pain to stop you have to push my dear (actually it was the tone of voice as well, not at all patronising just common sense)

edam · 20/07/2006 21:06

I don't know if it helped, exactly, but apparently I screamed 'f*ck' repeatedly. For several hours.

The only phrase that anyone else used that helped was lying to me that the anaesthetist was actually on his way, very shortly.

LadyTophamHatt · 20/07/2006 21:10

"get that F*cking dog away from me will you"

was one particular phrase that has stuck in my mind from my labour with DS3

It was home birth, and our own dog BTW...I wasn't insulting the MW!!

daysoftheweek · 21/07/2006 01:24

Following on from an earlier thread, after a long second(?) stage (the pushing bit) without much progress I started thinking

we're not getting anywhere
wanted to tell midwife to stick her hand in and pull him out (he had his hand up by his head)
if we don't get anywhere we're so far gone it's going to be forceps..... About 4 pushes later he came flying out (no one told me to stop pushing) So for me it was the thought of forceps.

lou33 · 21/07/2006 01:25

all i remember from number 4, was when the doc was breaking my waters, and telling me to sit on that hook more, saying

" i am i am, i am going to kick you in the face if you dont break it right now"

then when they broke, saying

" i love you"

iamapieceofcheesecake · 21/07/2006 01:27

"You won't beat me, i'm a and I will not be beaten!" (whilst bouncing on one of those labour ball thingies)
It helps that my family are really rather competative. I did end up having an 'emergency' 'c' section tho....

daysoftheweek · 21/07/2006 01:30

Being told I was 9cm when I arrived helped too.

daysoftheweek · 21/07/2006 01:33

Oh and what no one told me
You push him down a little bit then when the contraction finishes you can feel him moving all the way back up, so after I told the midwife we were getting nowhere since I could feel him move right back up it helped to be told that we were getting somewhere.

Xavielli · 21/07/2006 09:24

Shouting anything was wonderful!

bettythebuilder · 21/07/2006 10:03

I did a course of relaxation and self hypnosis with a hypnotherapist to help me overcome a phobia of needles, in preparation for the bloodtests,etc. This helped so much during the labour - I had 14 hours of contractions with no pain relief. The breathing techniques and 'drop shoulders to relax' etc were fantastic.
When the anaesthetist came with the epidural (obviously v. scary for me!) she said I was great, and she hoped she would breathe thro' a contraction as well when she had a baby! I felt so proud of myself, and her kind words helped me so much. (She'd probably read my notes and realised I needed all the encouragement I could get!)

riab · 21/07/2006 10:56

Oh yes, forgot to say being told I was 10 cm dilated 2 hrs after my waters broke and 1 hr after contractions started and so it was all going to be VERY fast!

in advance I think the best thing I got was a childbirth video from the NCT which explained how the muscles worked, the thing about it being an elastic band, you keep pushing and they slide back up but each time if you just push a bit harder and longer you stretch the elastic band and eventually they pop out.

Angeliz · 21/07/2006 11:01

Haven't read the thread but i WILL as i'm due soon.

I think the best thing i read was to sort of not fight the pain of the contraction but to welcome it and meet it halfway. As in 'bring it on' and then you feel it going. I'm sure it was worded alot better but it really made sense to me

dinosaur · 21/07/2006 11:03

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Angeliz · 21/07/2006 11:04

Thanks dinosaur I pray for a nice quick third (my others were quick too).
It has gone pretty quick, 5 weeks left and they're the longest!

shimmy21 · 21/07/2006 11:24

What didn't help at all at the pushing stage was the mw saying 'push down towards my hand'. Still don't really understand how you are supposed to do that.

what did help at pushing stage was friend's words - having a baby is like poohing out a water melon. I just couldn't do the pushing right at all until I tried 'poohing' the melon out (sorry if TMI but hey, birth is like that!)

Bugsy2 · 21/07/2006 12:05

Getting the breathing right really helped me. Completely didn't get this with my first one at all, but had a great midwife with my second who yelled at me how to manage the breathing - made a huge difference with my ability to cope with the contractions.
In between contractions, I would ask her to keep shouting at me, because in my distracted state I still couldn't manage to get the breathing right on my own!!!!

Original poster

Gemmitygem · 21/07/2006 12:14

...bugsy, how are you supposed to breathe during the contractions then? Just try to breathe slowly and normally, I guess?

OP posts:

Bugsy2 · 21/07/2006 12:22

I'm really not a very good person to ask, as I needed the midwife to shout at me to get it right. However, your antenatal classes really should teach you.
It is not something you worry about during the early stages but it is quite helpful during the later part of stage one & during delivery.
I also found concentrating on something like getting my breathing right very useful as it diverted my focus away from the force of the contractions.

Original poster

Gemmitygem · 21/07/2006 12:29

ok; will look in the book; won't go to antenatal classes probably as live in Kazakhstan, heading back for maternity leave to the UK but having the baby in Belgium, so can't see how to fit it in (though might try to go to a few in Belgium, they'll be in Flemish which I only kind of understand)...

OP posts:

Bugsy2 · 21/07/2006 12:37

Aha, can see how antenatal could be a bit tricky! From what I remember I blew in and out through my mouth really hard during the peak of the contraction. Towards the end it really wasn't that dignified and seemed to involve rather alot of snorting & spitty stuff but it really did give me a focus.
Can't honestly remember what the deal is during the pushing stage & don't want to mis-inform you. Hopefully your book & probably someone else on here can help you more with that bit.

Nome · 21/07/2006 12:42

I hummed through the contractions. That kept me breathing and not holding my breath. Also if I didn't hum, I shrieked and got tense and panicky.
And one of the best things I was told was to concentrate on breathing out and then breathing in would happen on its own.

HomicidalPsychoJungleCat · 21/07/2006 17:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

beckybrastraps · 21/07/2006 17:09

In answer to the OP, I'm not big on visualisation or any of that mullarkey, but I did listen to "Feeling Good" by Nina Simone many, many times during both labours, and now the song reduces me to tears every time I hear it.

"It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me....And I'm feeling GOOD"

quootiepie · 22/07/2006 18:07

Dont fight it - no amount of shaking, praying or throwing up is going to stop the pain, the needles... once you accept that for 24 hours it'll be tough and theres nothing you can do it does seem easier Keep your eye on the prize.

aitch71 · 22/07/2006 18:25

that breathing through your poo advice from joshandjamie's mum makes SO much sense. i wish i'd known that before my labour. (which was fine, by the way, really sore but totally bearable). i remember telling a friend that it was okay because it was like some crazy, unimaginably strong woman came and took over for a while.

although i do remember being irritated by DH who simply repeated everything the midwife said but louder. 'you're doing really well, Aitch' 'YOU'RE DOING REALLY WELL, AITCH' as if i hadn't heard her, most annoying but quite funny as i could see his head was about to explode with it all so he was just trying to get though it.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5