Home birth for first - good idea or being naive??

[meandbumpy]

This is my first baby, I've just had my 34 week appointment, everything is progressing well and I'm low risk. Midwife is very happy with things and asked if I'd considered having a home birth.
I love the thought of doing it but hadn't considered it before now because I'd felt a little under informed about labour. I've now spent a lot of time throughout the pregnancy reading up about the stages of birth, how it happens naturally and what could go wrong or what challenges I could face. I am keen to avoid any pain relieve other than gas and air and the hospital is very close to home should I need to transfer.
I don't feel nervous or anxious about the birth and I'm actually looking forward to it. Of course this could be down to my lack of experience and general naivety!

Does anyone have any first time home birth experiences they'd like to share to give me a bit of real life perspective?

Also, a few questions...

• Where do you get all the equipment from, birthing pool for example. Can you hire/borrow them or do you have to buy your own?

• Is it really messy!?

• What do you think, shall I go for it???

Have a look at homebirth.org.uk
Lots of evidenced based information plus more birth stories than you can shake a stick at, and lots of useful FAQs.

I booked two, transferred for CS with both (due to none-homebirth related issues), wouldn't change a thing they can be great, but only if that's what you want.

Some people are more happy and confident in hospital, some at home. You can change your mind at any time, including while in labour.

Consider the risks vs the benefits. Hospital birth has risks too - which set of risks are you happiest with?

Pool - can hire or buy. Ask locally lots may be able to lend you one and then you just buy a liner.

Messy - Not usually - inco sheets etc and towels get washed, you wouldn't want to birth on your brand new ivory sofa but then you would be mad to have a brand new ivory sofa if you plan to have children in the next 20 years

I wouldn't advise either way - find out more and see if you want to?

I was at home for DC1 right until the last minute when we transferred to hospital (blue light!) and gave birth within 5 mins of getting there. BUT I wouldn't have changed my decision to have a home birth. Other (non-medical) circumstances meant that I couldn't go for a home birth second time and I was quite disappointed. Hospital was fine, but I would have preferred to be at home.

Home birth MWs are trained to spot even the slightest thing which is not-quite-right & they'll transfer at the earliest possible time if they think you need it to avoid any undue risk.

You can hire or buy a birth pool (check ebay). But read up on them first. You need to be able to fill them easily, and maintain a regular and specific temperature (too warm or too cold can be dangerous). Emptying the yucky water out afterwards also needs to be thought about!(all great jobs for your OH!!!!).

It's adviseable to collect old blankets/towels in advance so you don't ruin any best ones. (obv not the ones that you use for the dog!). My MW also recommended I found an old duvet that I could use on the floor incase I didn't want to be in the pool.

Like tweety ssaid, though. It's a very personal decision. I was clearly in the home birth camp but I know that it would have been my best friend's worst nightmare. Do your homework and make an informed choice. You can always choose to go into hospital at any time if you become unsure.

I had hospital for my first and so glad I did as ended up emergency c section where time was of the essence due to ds being in distress. He still ended up being in scbu for 12 days in a children's hospital in another county. I'm not intending on scaremongering at all but just wanted to say I don't regret hospital choice at all and don't like to think of what the outcome might have been if we'd been at home. That's just my opinion of course and I know lots of other women have really positive home birth experiences

I had a home birth with my first, though it wasn't decided until fairly late (due to being 40, I was automatically higher risk, so had extra monitoring - all was fine, so they decided I was okay to go for it if I wanted to), so don't feel pressured to decide right away and it's fine if you decide and then change your mind. With us it was a little bit of a scramble to get stuff sorted as it was late-ish, but still enough time for a home visit and to get supplies.

Funnily enough I wasn't actually that bothered about whether I got a home birth or not - DP was more interested as he gets nervous in hospitals, so I thought I'd ask about the possibility. After that, because it was in my notes everyone I saw seemed to assume I was massively keen on it! (Apart from my lovely midwife who checked carefully that it was actually what I wanted.)

If you think you want a pool, check carefully that your floors are up to it and think about where you'll set it up. Bear in mind that it takes a while to fill, so makes sense to get it out and set up ready. We didn't, and I ended up not using it because by the time DP got home my contractions were close enough together that I wouldn't let him go and set it up .

I feel slightly bad that we also got loads of biscuits in for the midwives, but in the end we forgot entirely and I don't think they even got a cup of tea from us!

I wish I'd had one. Ended up with an induction (that I may not have needed), being uncomfortable on the monitor for a relatively quick and easy labour. Got given an episiotomy I also didn't need and wouldn't have consented to if I hadn't had my mind on other things (squeezing a baby out!). Most prep work for emcs happens at the hospital, not with you, so if you need to transfer for a cs it will be ready when you arrive. If nothing else planning for an hb means you can relax and if you are comfortable deliver where you are. If you don't plan for one, you can't have one.

I'm planning a homebirth for my first as well. I found the NCT site really helpful, they have lots of clear booklets you can download with all the relevent stats here

From you OP I can't see any reason why you shouldn't have a HB, and if your midwife is saying it is an option then I think you should go for it!

Get the champagne chilling for afterwards

Erm, I had a homebirth and I would never ever even consider cranial osteopathy for my baby. It's not at all obvious that someone opting for a homebirth is necessarily going to be into woo! And not all babies get colic. Bit too much of a plug for your business there?

I'd think very very carefully. I have a number of friends who were very low risk who nevertheless had problems at delivery. It wasn't worth it to me although I was constantly asked when pregnant with DD2 (DD1 labour was fast and easy; DD2 even faster and even easier - think less than 4 hours from the very first "is that a contraction? No surely not" to cuddling my baby).

Stop spamming the boards with your ads, Berkshire.
Have reported your posts.

Thanks for all the advice and stories everyone. Going to sit down tonight and have a good read of the links and weigh everything up. Thanks tweety and hotcross Should probably have a good chat with dp about it too as I have mentioned it to him but I'm not sure he realises it's a serious consideration yet.

I hadn't considered about keeping the the pool at the right temperature so will have to look into that as well. Is it a silly question to ask if you can use a normal bath instead?

I think i just like the idea of being in my own environment and like some of you have said going at my own pace and not being rushed into interventions does appeal. Love the thought of having chilled champers on hand for afterwards too!

I do know a couple of women who had home births for their first baby and it all went really well. The biggest benefit IMO is that I think you get 2 dedicated midwives for the whole birth. I’d go for one myself if I wasn’t living in a rented flat! If you’re feeling a bit doubtful then why not opt for a birth centre? That’s what I’m planning to do – I’ll get the home from home experience (hopefully) but if anything goes wrong then the doctors and labour ward are only one floor away. And it has the added bonus of me not having to clean up any mess!

I had a home birth in a rented flat…

I don't think it was that messy! I didn't clean it up anyway, midwives did all that!

I found it very long and tough without pain relief, but it was pretty amazing being in my own shower, bed, real food afterwards. Very settled healthy baby, very good start to breastfeeding, I was lucky enough to have no tears at all, I was walking the same day and out running again in a month, and I do think some of that was due to having a natural delivery which I don't think I would have had in hospital. I had a 30 hour labour, I think they would have interfered, and it might have been slower still. I feel very fortunate I was lucky enough to experience it.

I hired a pool from my local hospital (for free).

I had a home birth with my second and wish I had done so with my first! It isn't messy and at the first sign of any problems they will transfer you. I had three midwives all to myself sitting on my sofa, compared with one dashing in and out with DC1.

No you can't use a normal bath!!! It's fine to keep the pool at the right temperature. If you hire a pool they usually come with a floating thermometer. Simply connect a hose to your hot tap and make sure your boiler is going full throttle. My hubby rather enjoyed his 'job' of keeping the pool at the right temperature.

My dad brought the chilled champers round and I was drinking it 3 hours after my daughter was born!

I'd do it if I could get a birthing pool into my flat. But our lounge is a bit small and we're on the first floor so I'm not sure the floor is strong enough. I have visions of crashing through the floorboards and winding up in the dental surgery downstairs!

I have had all 4DC at home. With the 1st we lived 5mins from the hospital so I didn't feel it was a concern, I was more concerned by the speed bumps on the route than the time it would take!
I went with the staying at home as long as I could mind set, even packed a 'hospital' bag (so everything was in 1 place for DH to find) but the MW arrived 45 mins before DS1 was born.
We'd moved by the time I had DD1 and I didn't fancy 40mins of ring road to get to the hospital!
I used a pool every time - bought from ebay!
You may want to listen to the hypnobirth CDs, I found them great for falling asleep to!
And my only pain relief was a TENS machine as they never got to me in time to set up the gas!
Remember - its never to late to decide to go to hospital, but it doesn't work the other way!
Good luck with whatever you choose.

I would say, do some more research and then go for it ifyou're happy with the idea. And if at any point you're not happy, fine, go to hospital. I was booked in for a home birth with my first (6 months ago), bought a secondhand unused pool for our tiny front room, and had a great labour experience up until the time when the midwife caught two dips of dc'sr's heartrate and we had to transfer to hospital. But that went quickly and while it wasn't the peaceful water delivery I'd hoped for, it wasn't awful either and we were both fine. I would totally book another home birth again because I personally feel more comfortable that way, which doesn't apply to everyone.

sorry to ask such a dumb question (I'm on 3rd hospital birth) but weren't you worried about the noise for neighbours ect? especially in a flat?
I think I would be worrying about the noise which would stress me but that's just me!!!
I was just thinking about this last night in bed!

Hi OP. yep, I had both DCs at home, both planned. DC1 was long, but between the bath (we didn't bother with a pool, bath easier to maintain the temperature in) and some gas and air, it was an intense but utterly amazing experience. DC2 emerged in 1.5 hrs, so by the time OH had run the bath there wasn't time to get in

Poster up thread is right about the MWs. You have x2 with you once you're in active labour, both experienced community MWs with home birth expertise. They are v careful with you throughout and really don't take any chances. I was lucky enough to have the MW who'd seen me throughout the pregnancy at both births, so she knew me (which meant she could better judge how things were going than someone who'd only seen me in labour) and I knew and trusted her, which helped me relax and focus on the job in hand.

It's not messy at all....or rather it is, but you can manage it easily. I had both mine on the floor in the dining room - don't know why, but just where I felt comfortable and relaxed. For a floor birth we layered first a shower curtain (waterproof), then cardboard boxes (absorbent), then a sheet (soft). After the labours one midwife literally hosed me down helped me shower, while the other just folded everything up and took it away. By the time I was out of the shower the dining room just looked like we'd had a party (cups, glasses etc). Both times we were in bed with the baby within 2hrs of birth. Just blissful and lovely to sleep on your own bed afterwards

I'd really recommend that you labour where you feel most comfortable as that will help you achieve an appropriate (for you and your baby) length birth and leave you with the most positive memories. For some this hospital, for others home. For me it was overwhelmingly home. I honestly, LOVED both my births and would do it at home once a month if I could, just for the soaring elation and feeling of power afterwards. Honestly I feel like a bloody goddess afterwards!!!

Good luck to you all, whichever path you chose! X

Freckles - I thought the whole bloody town might have heard me withDS2, but they claim not to have! Either polite, mutton Jeff, or there's some sort of evolutionary blanking out of the mooing of a woman in labour!

Thanks for all the responses, I'm glad you're all telling me to do the research because I've been reading up and there's a lot more to consider and organise than I'd envisaged. The main thing to come out of it so far is that being in control of my birth and having an active labour are the things that are most important to me. I'm going to discus in more detail with the midwife about how much of my birth plan they can provide and support in the midwife lead unit and go from there. If they don't make me feel confident about supporting my wishes, which are quite detailed and specific tbh, it'll probably be best for me to go for the home birth.

Freckles, I was briefly worried about this before the birth as we live in a mid-terrace with fairly thin walls. In the end I told them in advance while we chatted over the fence, but don't think it's an obligation! I did end up groaning and banging the wall of our bedroom a bit (which is also the wall of the neighbour's room) but I really don't think they would have heard that much. They did notice when the ambulance turned up at 5am! Spoke to them afterwards and sent a card of greetings & apology but on the whole I reckoned it's quite a one-off and gives them something to gossip about - and the baby crying for months afterwards would probably be more annoying for them.

Oh and meandbumpy, one thing I did was a 4-week Active Birth class at our local hospital. Twas only £40 and really, really worthwhile, both my partner and I had a much better understanding of the labour process afterwards which I think was essential for me to feel calm and in control at home. Some people prefer not to know too much about what's going to happen, and let the midwives be in charge, but I think for a home birth it really helps to know what to expect and a bit about what the different feelings mean as they happen. Helped me to feel much more comfortable and also gave me ideas for breathing/positions/pain relief.