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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

vagina etiquette?

81 replies

amybelle1990 · 25/08/2012 16:09

I'm due in 7 weeks and I've allowed myself to get a little... ungroomed downstairs. Did any of you get 'tidied up' downstairs or did you just leave it until afterwards? I've never paid for waxing or anything and shaving is out of the question atm. I'm sort of thinking that whatever my vagina looks like the midwife will have seen worse but I don't know what the general standard is.

Any opinions?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

BabydollsMum · 31/08/2012 23:52

Haha Shortbutsosweet so true. YOU WON'T CARE! x

mameulah · 01/09/2012 07:56

Binfull, that is a brilliant story! It really cheered me up, thanks!

rogersmellyonthetelly · 01/09/2012 10:20

Seriously, don't worry about it! I got a mirror and had a trim of the length with some scissors in the middle, it was starting to look like sleeping beauty's Castle after 100 years sleep. Other than that, just have a shower in early labour (make sure someone is with you ) and you are good to go.

Katienana · 01/09/2012 14:16

I have wilkinson sword bikini trim and shave which is safe to use blind, I find it messy to have lots of hair but it's for my benefit I don't care what midwife or dh thinks! Equally if someone in late preg wants to get their nails or tan done then go for it, whatever makes you feel better. I'm getting my brows threaded next week it's practical as I won't need to pluck them for a week or so afterwards and will look ok without makeup.

EarnestDullard · 01/09/2012 20:47

I trimmed mine today, but only cos with the warm weather and my bump (which is quite low) I've been feeling uncomfortably sweaty in general. Was pretty much waving the trimmer around blindly in the general direction though. Oddly I could sort of see around my bump on one side (if I lifted it a bit) but not the other. So I ether have a lopsided bump or a lopsided minge Did manage to nick myself a bit too. At 35w I think this'll be my last attempt.

FoxyRoxy · 02/09/2012 01:52

I have shaved everything off for about the last 10 years, I can't have hair there just because I'm pregnant. I'm still shaving (38 weeks) although blind now as I can only see very little. I've managed not to massacre myself down there so far!

It's nowt to do with other people seeing it, it's just me and my personal preference. I'm also going to get eyelash extensions so I don't have to worry about mascara, I want to look nice in the pictures!

PollyIndia · 02/09/2012 10:20

I've been having hollywoods/brazilians for absolutely years now, over 12 I think. So I will have it done before I go into labour, not because I care what the midwives think, and I have no OH to think about either, but because it just feels tidier and it's what I have always done. I am sure I did start when I was 23 because it was a bit porn and i was only 23, but that's not why I do it now as someone who is much older and totally single! Reading Badgerina's comment about the congealed blood in your pubic hair has sealed the deal even if I was wavering!

I go and get it waxed professionally though - having been trying to do perineal massage over the last few weeks and struggling, I am sure that trying to do a DIY wax/shave could only end badly.

Sarahbananabump · 02/09/2012 10:32

Oh ladies- we don't care what it looks like down there! We just want baby out safely. we don't go discussing what any woman's vagina looks like let alone complaining if they haven't shaved their lady garden!

I can see why you worry , but it really isn't an issue !

It's a bit like the whole socks on or off with a smear debate too! It doesn't matter

GhostShip · 02/09/2012 13:38

I'd shave. Itll be easier if you have a episiotomy.

nickelcognito · 02/09/2012 18:49

ghostship - Bollocks. I had an episiotomy and I was natural down there.

Sarahbananabump · 02/09/2012 19:03

I have never seen any hair on the perineum , whetger the woman had shaved or was au naturel - it would not get in the way of an episiotomy .

PorkyandBess · 02/09/2012 19:09

I think it really doesn't matter and that anything goes.

But having said that, I have 2 friends that are midwives and they say that if they had to choose, they prefer a waxed fanjo.

MirandaWest · 02/09/2012 19:10

I didn't do anything with DS. Had big blood loss and ended up with very matted pubes. Needed to cut chunks out of it when I was up to that.

With DD I trimmed. This was much better.

MirandaWest · 02/09/2012 19:11

Oh I did have an episiotomy with DS and my pubic hair made no difference to it. Was purely for blood loss reasons I trimmed with DD.

GhostShip · 02/09/2012 19:22

I meant bleeding through epsitomy. The clogged blood in the hair... Not pleasant for you is it.

GhostShip · 02/09/2012 19:28

I never said it couldn't be done and never said it would get in the way. So comments like 'I had one and I'm natural' are a bit irrelevant. But since you will be bleeding and need suturing, it would be less messy for both midwife and yourself if there's not hair in the way. That's all I meant.

DowntonOut · 02/09/2012 19:34

Just read with horror the post about a registrar dry shaving a mother before c section . The guide from my hospital says it's important not to remove your own pubic hair as the hospital staff will do it for you before a section, but I'd be terrified of being shaved, even more so if dry. I tend to only trim my pubes, because no matter what method I use, my skin gets irritated, pores bleed and regrowth is hellishly itchy. The thought of that plus a section = Agony.

With my first birth, MWs and my mum saw the lot. No one seems to have sustained any permanent damage.

nickelcognito · 03/09/2012 12:23

the episiotomy itself doesn't bleed much - it's stretched skin, you see.

you get a lot more bleeding from the lochia.

nickelcognito · 03/09/2012 12:24

re: your second post - seriously, it wasn't a problem at all.
the hair is nowhere near the cut.

nickelcognito · 03/09/2012 12:27

i don't get the problem with the blood and matted hair (ghost and miranda)

any blood i had was easily removed with baby wipes (in a similar but more gentle movement as i use on my head hair, and with fingers rather than hands), especially after a bit of a bath.

the blood in my pubes was a far smaller problem than the pain in my underbeneathsies from a baby being pushed out and stitches afterpains.

GhostShip · 03/09/2012 13:01

Nickel - if you've seen as much birth as I have you will understand that some woman have got lots of hair there and do bleed quite a lot

A poster has already said she had to hack chunks off because hers were matted. Everyone is different. .

5madthings · 03/09/2012 13:45

yep i found it better to have a good trim.down below so that it was easier to keep clean/dry etc. ime if i leave myself untrimmed the even a heavy period is yuckier with longer pubic hair. i dont shave just use clippers ir nail acissors to keep it short and neat. just personal experience/preference.

Grumpla · 03/09/2012 13:48

If you're going to do anything to it, at least have the decency to shave it into a little "Welcome" mat to give the poor midwives a bit of a laugh

MirandaWest · 03/09/2012 13:59

I'm not sure really why my matted pubes were such a problem but after a not nice birth experience including epidural after birth due to having to go to theatre as they couldn't work where my blood loss was coming from, and why it wouldn't stop and having my legs put like this -- (was v painful afterwards due to having SPD) I think it was just the last straw that as well as feeling like i had been through 10 rounds with someone I had horribly matted pubes. I wasn't able to have a bath for a few days after birth (had sponge bath at some point) and just wanted to feel a little normal again. Hence doing some topiary before DD was born .

Of course her birth was a lot easier and was able to shower straight after she was born :) plus I only lost 1 pint of blood that time and didn't need any stitches even :)

aufaniae · 03/09/2012 14:05

I am more worried about whether the pain relief is going to work.

Hair? Couldn't care less!

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