Told I must move close to a hospital at 38 weeks due to where I live.

[ukulelelady]

I live on an island, the nearest hospital is a 30 minute boat journey followed by 3 hours drive. I have to be moved at 38 weeks, just in case. I might not go into labour until 42 weeks which means I'm hanging about For a MONTH! The hospital have like nurses accommodation that's for people who live too far away. It's not a maternity unit. I'll have my own room but have to share with folk recovering from operations, people going through chemo/radiotherapy. Even relatives being close to hospital while their loved ones are dying. I get to stay here for free because I'm the patient but my partner will have to pay nearly £30 a night to share my bed/sleep on my floor. I'm getting stressed about this because I already feel lonely and freaked out, don't want to be on my own in a strange city and can't afford paying potentially hundreds of pounds for partner staying. It's like the bloody dark ages. The accommodation has shared shower and toilet and a microwave and a fridge. Think it has a telly in your room. Does anyone else have to go through hoops to suit authorities. What about people who live 4 hours drive from hospital? Do they have to move? Any words of comfort? I should add I was told I could give birth anywhere in the uk if I had family/friends I could stay with as long as it was closer to a hospital which made me feel even more lonely.

what would be the alternative?
home birth? helicopter on standby in case of emergency?
sorry for you that it is such a stressful time.

Sounds preferable to having your baby on a ferry!

as above, what't the alternative?
I had home births mainly because I was low risk etc etc but also because I live a few minutes away from a very good hospital. During one pregnancy I lived 40mins away from a hospital and found it very unnerving!

Presumably you can say no. You are a competent adult, after all. But you will of course have to weigh up the pros and cons of doing so.

Both of you are right of course but still doesn't make me feel better and at least I don't have to pay for my "digs". I sound like a spoilt brat, just having a bad day and wanting a moan.

You don't sound like a spoilt brat at all. Staying away from home in late pregnancy does sound grim, I dont blame you for being annoyed about it but it really does sound preferable to having your baby on a ferry or having to be medevac'ed out when you're having contractions.

What are you other options?

Do you know anyone with a helicopter/ light aircraft?

Where do you live?

Surely other people manage to give birth where you live without going through this rigmarole?

I met someone in your situation on the ferry once. The worse bit for her was being met by an ambulance as she got off the ferry.
Take some good books.

Moan away. Is there really no other option, nobody to stay with?

I would be trying to make the best of a not ideal situation - could you take some throws and posters and stuff to make the room more homily. Lots of books, dvds and make sure you have internet to mn
Could you arrange for dh to stay for a shorter time nearer your due date or book him into a youth hostel or something for a few days a week just to cut costs?

Will they induce you?
Surely its cheaper for them to induce than possibly have to accommodate you for a month?

That sounds awful, sympathies. I was touch and go apparently whether to deliver at my local hospital or transfer to the mainland - fortunately I stayed put, given labour only took 4 hours! Apart from the comedy value, in all seriousness I suspect at least one of my Dts would have died if I'd tried to transfer. But obviously being a mulitple put me high risk. Is this your first?

Actually if they don't have a maternity dept is there really much point being there? Would staying with friends or family elsewhere not be a better option?

What would happen if you went into labour earlier than 38 weeks? I am genuinely interested as it never occurred to me that anyone, even in remote places would have to relocate to be near services.

I suppose I had a romantic notion of women being cared for by local midwives and having home births but having the support of emergency services if an emergency transfer was needed.

To have to move into unfamiliar accommodation for up to a month in shared facilities seems very unsettling, no wonder you are stressed about it.

Is a home birth not an option?

Or Could you not look for a short term let house that at least you could feel a bit more at home and not shared facilities?

Sorry I have nothing more practical to suggest, I hope you work something out, good luck!

Well the woman I met came from one of the more remote Western Isles. In an emergency it would probably be an RAF helicopter, but if there are weather issues it could be tricky. I assume if there are any adverse symptoms they move you sooner.
It's not like here where the nearest hospital is a few miles up the road.

They can't make you do anything - this is still a free country.

Personally, I would probably wait it out at home but leave for the hospital as soon as any sign of labour started.

The short-term let is also a good idea.

you choose to live in an area that cant cover maternity services. and now you complain about the lack of maternity services at a time when you will get lots of sympathy.
Will you be back in four years complaining about the hours you spend on the school run? or the lack of choice in secondary schools?

sorry, but i have no sympathy for such shortsightedness. If your area doesnt have services then its up to all of you as a community to ensure that you do indeed have them for the people, ie yourselves, to have access to. If you live three hours away from medical care, then why have you not lobbyed hard for it to be put in place on your island before? Its not exactly an impossible struggle, and if it is, then you need to make the arrangements for your carelong before it comes down to spending thousands and thousands of taxpayers money on an RAF helicopter.

The authorities aren't forcing you to do anything. you are the one making assumptions that everyone else should jump through hoops to make things fluffy and comfortable for you.

Fbnomore, bit harsh. The smaller scottish islands do not have the population to justify a maternity unit per island, no matter how much you might lobby and this type of situation arrives because they closed matenity units such as the one in Oban, which was feasible to get to by ferry. I think they send you to Glasgow now. (Family member from Mull had her babies in Stirling due to friends nearby to stay with).

Plus what about all the locals who live there, should they all move to the mainland so that they don't cost the taxpayer too much money?

Fb that is astoundingly unhelpful. She's not asking everyone to run around for her, she's saying this is the situation, it's a bit shit, anyone got any ideas or support to offer. If you have neither, why post.

I can empathise, whilst not in your situation, I do live an hour by road to the nearest hospital, and ended up having an unplanned homebirth with my last child due to the labour being too fast. I have to say that I would not want to be travelling your sort of distances whilst in labour, it is tough enough being in labour in comfortable surroundings without having to travel.

But at the same time, if I have another baby, I will be forced to go to hospital at 38 weeks too (due to my age they will not risk another homebirth for me ).

I think that you do have to try to make the best of a horrible situation, as others here have said, try to make where you go as homey as possible during your wait. Will your partner be able to take time off work etc to be able to stay with you much of the time, or will he have to be travelling back and forth? It is a tough situation for both of you.

At least once you are there you should not be tied to staying in the hospital grounds, you should be able to get out and about a bit all being well, hope there are plenty of interesting coffee shops places to go to while you are there.

I find fbnomore a bit harsh too but it is well known that people living in remote places have to travel to access services most of us city dwellers take for granted on our doorstep; and I do think no-one would suggest this if they didn't think it was in the best interests of you and your child. Pregnancy is unpredictable, and can fast become an emergency situation, especially near term. I was a "low risk" mother in my first pregnancy but developed pre-eclampsia very suddenly which rapidly became life threatening for both of us (my DD1 did not survive). My second pregnancy was much better but both DD2 and I would still have died from a totally different and unrelated pregnancy complication without very rapid acess to medical care (she is a fantastic 14 month old now). There was no reason in advance to imagine I would ever have such complicated pregnancies.

Of course my experience is extreme, and its likely your pregnancy and delivery will turn out to be routine, but no-one can predict this in advance. I kind of think you just have to try to make the most of this situation [but I think you could ask to be considered for an induction around 39-40 weeks if the cervix is favourable by then to reduce the time spent there]

Is this your first?

Before I had my 1st baby I had no idea of how the care from Maternity Services would be provided, it wasn't a factor in my planning.

We wanted a baby, we got pregnant.

Call me shortsighted, but I would suggest that most people don't research to that extent until they are in a position to need those services?

This is my first child and every mum to be is in the same boat, so to speak, but some are lucky and have friends or family they can stay with. I don't want to stay with an auntie I last met at a family wedding years ago, not very fair on either of us, there's no one I'm close enough to to ask. My immediate family live just down the road. Fb, what a great support you are! Of course you're totally right I choose to live in a remote area with virtually no services and I wish you got to see my earlier post, but I was cut off by having shit broadband services just another joy of island living. Thanks for all the positive comments guys, I was and am having one of those days and had a moan about what's stressing me out, but I guess fb doesn't have bad days.

have you looked into a short term rental property? if a landlord has an empty property they may be willing to rent for a month if they don't have a tennent? or what about a holiday let? cottage or chalet? living in hospital digs sounds grim.

fbnomore the OP doesn't actually moan about having a lack of maternity services, she's just a bit stressed about having to be away from home for a month that late in pregnancy, which is totally understandable. Surely a pregnant women is allowed a bit of a moan on a childbirth thread.

OP I don't have any extra useful advice, but do look into short let, £30 a night is a lot so depending on area you may well be able to find something around the same cost.