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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Told I must move close to a hospital at 38 weeks due to where I live.

45 replies

ukulelelady · 01/03/2012 14:44

I live on an island, the nearest hospital is a 30 minute boat journey followed by 3 hours drive. I have to be moved at 38 weeks, just in case. I might not go into labour until 42 weeks which means I'm hanging about For a MONTH! The hospital have like nurses accommodation that's for people who live too far away. It's not a maternity unit. I'll have my own room but have to share with folk recovering from operations, people going through chemo/radiotherapy. Even relatives being close to hospital while their loved ones are dying. I get to stay here for free because I'm the patient but my partner will have to pay nearly £30 a night to share my bed/sleep on my floor. I'm getting stressed about this because I already feel lonely and freaked out, don't want to be on my own in a strange city and can't afford paying potentially hundreds of pounds for partner staying. It's like the bloody dark ages. The accommodation has shared shower and toilet and a microwave and a fridge. Think it has a telly in your room. Does anyone else have to go through hoops to suit authorities. What about people who live 4 hours drive from hospital? Do they have to move? Any words of comfort? I should add I was told I could give birth anywhere in the uk if I had family/friends I could stay with as long as it was closer to a hospital which made me feel even more lonely.

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Original poster

ukulelelady · 01/03/2012 22:39

Thanks thefurryone think I will check to see what's available, I'd rather have my partner with me and if we're paying that much for crappy accommodation anyway....

OP posts:

babybouncer · 02/03/2012 08:27

I'm not quite in the same position ukelelelady, but I recently had to go into hospital for a night for observation and on the same ante-natal ward (part of the post-natal ward) were lots of women who were having to stay in for days or weeks before their due date because of various risk factors. Very few felt ill and because we were part of the post-natal ward there were very strict visiting hours. It was crappy and boring and lonely, BUT (and this is important) better than the alternative and only in the short term! I probably have to go back before the birth, so I'm clinging to this last fact...

LittleWhiteWolf · 02/03/2012 09:11

It doesn't sound ideal or much fun, but I think I'd rather stay on the hospital grounds than travel 3 1/2 hours by boat and car while in labour. My labour started with my waters breaking so I had an uncomfortable enough car journey, fretting about getting the seat wet so I sat on towels and used up several pads as even though I set off 2 hours after my waters broke, they were still leaking a lot. I would have hated to do that on a ferry surrounded by other people then a long car journey. Plus I guess you run the risk of being stuck on the island if weather conditions mean the ferry can't run.

No its not perfect, but I think it sounds better than the alternative. I am sorry for you though--its not something I'd ever thought about. My nearest hospital is 25 minutes away.

cherryjam · 02/03/2012 15:00

ukulelelady - you poor thing. Would definitely echo what thefurryone has said - look up 'owners direct' on the internet and see if you could get a self catering short let - then you would have your own privacy and home comforts. Best of luck

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 02/03/2012 15:28

Ukelelelady - if you were able to post the name of the hospital you'll be staying at, you might find there are some mumsnetters nearby, who'd be willing to come and visit you, or invite you to visit them - to alleviate the boredom a little, and get you out of the hospital environment.

I'm near Glasgow, so probably too far south for you, but if you were in my area, I'd definitely do this for you.

PeppyNephrine · 02/03/2012 15:36

fb might be harsh, but she's right. Why moan about "the authorities" going out of their way to try and help you, putting you up, spending resources on you?

startail · 02/03/2012 15:50

What the heck do you do for DCs 2,3 etc.
DH couldn't have a month off work to toddler sit!!

PopcornMouseInBoots · 02/03/2012 16:03

Genuine question OP, what do islanders do if they go into labour prematurely? There must be a contingency, surely?

I second the suggestion of a short-term let, or sometimes B&Bs will do good rates for longer stays (though not as comfortable as a let perhaps)

BackforGood · 02/03/2012 16:12

It does sound boring, but you have to focus on the positive, that it's about both your health and the health, and the safety of your baby. It's not great, but presumably you can wander about in the day - walk round the park or go to the shops or library or whatever - unlike the poor ladies who have to be in hospital for medical reasons for weeks before birth.
I guess it is one of the downsides of living somewhere as remote and beautiful as you do. I was chatting to a lady on another thread, who had to be out of her house for 6 hours every day while she was having radiotherapy (because of the distance she is from the hospital). A radio therapy blast takes less than 5 mins. It was a time I was very grateful to live in a big City a few miles from a great hospital, but of course there are othertime when I'd love to live by the sea or in the mountains.....
Rant away though, and take some internet device so you can still MN away those hours. We'll keep our fingers crossed for an early baby

LunaticFringe · 02/03/2012 16:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

ukulelelady · 02/03/2012 20:07

Thanks for all the show of support, it just seems to be getting nearer and more real, I'm 32 weeks. I was feeling a bit sorry for myself yesterday, feeling better now and of course everyone's right - the health of my baby and me are the main thing and I might even enjoy some time to myself before d day.
To answer a few of your questions if a woman went into labour before 38 weeks a lifeboat would be launched in the same way for any medical emergency here. In some serious cases a helicopter would come. An ambulance would be waiting on the pier on the mainland ready to take you to hospital. I don't know what happens when you're having your 2nd or 3rd child, the women I know that live here that have gone on to have more than 1 have stayed with their parents on the mainland, or one woman went away on her own with dh looking after 2 kids and friends pitching in to help. Her dh had a friend with a boat and travelled to the hospital when she went into labour and got there in time, again, friends looked after the kids while they were both away. So there we have it. Living in a beautiful place is all fine and well until you need services, fancy going out for a meal, cinema, taking the kids to a park even. I'm not moaning about the lack of any of these things And i realise I'm very lucky.

OP posts:

Mmmmcheese · 03/03/2012 04:24

I would just add that its not always straightforward to know when you"re actually in labour. There are always loads of threads in pregnancy where people aren't sure and you can also get lots of false starts. So definitely best to be near a hospital on the mainland. It is a PITA but having been in hospital for 2 months before DS was born and on bedrest at home for 2 months before DD was born, I can still say that its worth it in the end.

If you do end up in the hospital accomodation can you get lots of dvds, books, magazines etxc to make time pass quicker? I used to play compter games on a tablet and it made time go very quckly.

SarryB · 03/03/2012 12:36

I was in exactly this situation until I moved to the mainland at 5 months pregnant. (I'm still 2 hours from the nearest hospital!)

The nearest hospital to the island I was on was an hour on the ferry, plus a 5 hour drive. I was living on an island off the Scottish west coast.

I was advised to go and stay with my mum in Suffolk (a two-day journey by car/train) at 36 weeks. This was because if anything bad happened during the birth/in the couple of weeks afterwards, I would have somewhere familiar, comforting and free to stay.

I think I would have done what the doctor advised - but as you're saying that your immediate family live close, that's not really an option. I would look for a short-term rental place if I were you.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 03/03/2012 12:47

Ukelelelady - do you want to tell us where you are going to be staying, so that we can see if there are any mumsnetters nearby who might be able to visit you?

AlpinePony · 03/03/2012 13:04

I lived on Shetland for a while and the main secondary school was in Lerwick although a lot of my friends were from the outlying islands (Foula, Fair Isle, Unst, etc.). Many of us were boarders but equally many lived in Lerwick - and I'm sure if I were still living there and had to be in hospital in Lerwick I'd be able to call on people to visit - or get out and visit them. Is that not a possibility? You must have old school friends and if your island is that small & remote maybe you went away for school?

GizzyBoo · 03/03/2012 16:31

ukulelelady I am sort of in the same position. Though it is a 5 hour ferry trip to the mainland for me. I have decided that if the pregnancy remains low risk I shall be staying at home on the island to give birth. It is not unheard of. There are 2 midwives here and a GP who is an experienced birth attendant. I don't have family on the mainland...well not in Scotland anyway (we moved here from the midlands 18 months ago) and I am not going to travel 13 hours to stay with my parents further south.
If there are problems I will require emergency transport off the island but the risk is small.
It is the norm for mothers to go away at 37-38 weeks here but I just can't imagine being away from my husband or other children.

Would you consider a home birth?

Original poster

ukulelelady · 03/03/2012 21:52

Gizzyboo don't think home birth would be an option as no doctor or midwives here. Population of about 100. Alpinepony I too had to go away for high school but it's not where the hospital is and I'm only in touch with a few, don't think anyone settled near the hospital. I will have some friends who will be dropping by. I was just looking at the glass half empty, we all have those days.

Thanks again for the support :)

OP posts:

AlpinePony · 04/03/2012 06:59

Don't worry, we all have shit days like that. :) I don't suppose you're able to throw money at it and hire a private mw?

I suppose all you can do is take a lovely load of books/crafts/laptop or learn to embroider - do one of a gazillion things you won't have the will to do for a while. Take your swimming costume and go to the pool - floating is just lovely and calming - and maybe a heated indoor pool is something you don't have on your island?

I don't know, maybe time to enjoy all the little things - e.g., what we like to call "shops" or "getting today's newspaper before 3pm". ;)

fbnomore · 07/03/2012 14:15

i was being a bit harsh, and i apologise for that.

Hope you get everything sorted, and you have a safe, easy delivery.

BigTeuchLittleTeuch · 07/03/2012 14:52

I was in exactly the same boat as you - I live on an island and was advised that (because of a previous 36w birth) I would have to be off the island a full month before due date. The thought was hideous...just when you are 'nest-building' and want to be close to home, you have to leave! I found it extremely stressful.

I ended up electing to go to the town where I have family (I see this is not an option for you...friends?) where I planned to stay with family for 2 weeks with DS before birth of DC2 and then we rented a place for a month. As it happened, DC2 arrived at 37 weeks so we neer stayed in the rented accommodation (and the kind woman gave us full refund!).

I have been told that I could have pushed for homebirth (not that I would have as both DC needed rescuscitation, lamps, etc due to being premature) and that a midwife would be posted on the island (In B&B) from 2 weeks before due date. I also had early contractions (24wks) and had a helicopter and midwife on stand-by...in that situation they could get me to Paisley in less than 35mins.

Others have not left until closer to their due date with no problems. One friend gave birth on the lifeboat!

This is causing you stress - speak to your GP or MW and be clear exactly what the options are.

Can you give a hint where you are - it might help?

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