How sore is childbirth? If being compared to a very very bad period?

[Iwantababynow]

I get the worst periods! to the point that 2 times ive been taken to the hospital because im screaming in pain, I cant take it, however my doctor says I have a high pain threshold, I had my appendix removed and refused pain killers after.

so, you girls out there that know what its like to be in bed 3 days a month due to extreme period pains, how did birth compare to that for you?

I really want a natural birth in water without pain relief... how bad can it be???

thanks guys, ps i love mums net :)

hackmum, I used self-hypnosis to a degree, and I was induced with an 8lb 14ozer who was back to back and was in early labour for (now I realise) nearly two weeks, arrived at the hospital at 2cm after waters breaking/slow contractions for 24 hours, then onto drip to speed things up, took 18 hours from that point and would have had contractions I was feeling/were strengthening for I suppose 30 of the total hours. At the moment I got the epidural, I actually was managing the pain fine but I was due a VE and I knew that I would lose my focus if someone came near me, that the pain was too intense to just breathe/focus through it. I had a stress ball and the image of it is burned into my brain.

It was one likethis and I spent at least five hours staring at it and bringing it towards my face and then slowly away from my face. I think I was breathing in time to this action, but it is the ball I remember, not the breathing. From the time the drip went in the pain progressed quite quickly (as it tends to do when you are on a syntocin drip!) and there were times I felt I was swimming in it but my head was above the water.. I was lucky it never really got beyond that.

I don't think it felt like period pains, I think it felt like waves of pain/intensity. I honestly don't remember it as pain now but I know it was and not only that but it was more intense and more of a whole body experience than any other pain I have ever felt in my life. I also know I was very aware that it would peak and subside and that it was very important not to panic when it was rising... because of course each time it went higher, and you have to remember in that second that it will come back down again.. and there are seconds that you really have to focus really intensely to do that. So it was totally absorbing and I wish I had been able to move too, I knew I kind of needed to but I was obviously stuck to a drip and a monitor which didn't help!

I personally think it's the panic that makes the experience easier/harder to see as "okay". The panic is the most uncomfortable part of it, the fact you don't know when it will end or where it's going to, the fear you won't be able to keep your head above water. I think this really relates very strongly to the pain. I had had one experience of this when I had a very severe asthma attack and I was waiting for the ambulance and trying to breathe.. I remember having moments where I really thought I wouldn't be able to take the next breath. Labour was quite similar...

for me it hardly hurt at all

i thought i was proabably in the early stages of labour... maybe? i was 7cm

20mins later i was a mummy... just used TENS on level 4. I certainly didnt need anything else either. (it wasnt like there was no time, i never felt like i needed anything else)

breastfeeding was more painful than giving birth for me.

i did natal hypnotherapy which i swear made a huge difference, and i was very positive about it not being that bad, as my mum gave birth without needing any pain relief too

It's just so different for everybody. Nobody can tell you what it will be like. Because you could say that the pain increases slowly or each contraction has a peak, just as the textbooks do and you'll go into it knowing you'll get a break between pains. But then you could be like me and have the same level of pain at the start as you do 2 days later when they finally do an emcs. Now I wasn't 'normal' in the sense that I had a severely malpositioned baby (they didn't know this) but there were no gaps, there was no peak to each contraction. It was relentless, exhausting, everywhere but nowhere, would have gladly ended my own life to end the suffering type pain. I was certain I was dying.

I learnt my lesson the first time round. There are drugs for a reason. I refused all of them as I wanted to do it the 'right' way. I was a bloody fool tbh.

With bad period pains I could lift my finger and point to where it hurts. In labour I was so gripped by it that I couldn't voluntarily move a muscle at times.

I am not trying to be pessimistic or scare you. My labour wasn't normal. But it's worth knowing that it's nothing to do with pain thresholds (I have quite a high pain threshold, had two emcs and no pain relief after either, broke my foot and didn't realise etc) and everything to do with luck. That's what the drugs are for. For when everything else doesn't help.

I did natal hypnotherapy nannyl, my Mum had no pain relief. I was so prepared. And I thought I was failing at labour when it couldn't touch it. But I made the mistake of trying to manage the pain, breathe through it, visualise. I thought I was trying to work with my body. What I was doing was ignoring it. Pain does happen for a reason sometimes.

I can't say I got particularly strong periods and to be honest I still couldn't describe labour pains properly even a few hours after delivery! However at one point recently I did have a rather hot curry which wrought its usual damage on my internal organs (TMI I know but this is going somewhere!). I remember clutching my aching abdomen as something in there rearranged itself and thinking 'Oh yes, contractions were like this!'. Only much much more intense, repetitive and boring IMO...

One thing no-one ever told me about is the sheer BOREDOM of early labour. I took 29.5 hours from having a show to pushing him out and spent most of that time really tired (as it started at midnight) but unable to sleep because I simply couldn't sit or lie down during contractions (it hurt much more in that position). So I spent all day lumbering around in pain and unable to focus on anything else, which got very boring very quickly. Then suddenly it ramped up about ten gears and I was blissfully thankful for the hospital's gas and air!

I wasn't allowed any pain relief for the actual delivery: the midwife took the gas and air off me and said 'You can not have this anymore, it is time to push. USE the pain!' Admittedly that bit wasn't so bad, as it felt like I could finally contribute something to the whole process... crowning was painful to say the least though, as my boy came out with an arm over his head!!

As for your water birth plan, I did find a hot bath to be very very nice and soothing in labour - so that might help you out.

I had g&a with dd but not during delivery and only had g&a during pushing with ds. Labour, contractions and actual birth are nothing like period pains for me. The very first few contractions are worse than tge worst periods I've ever had and tge pain in tge back is similar but worse.

It can be dine without pain relief but you shouldn't close it all off as an option.

BUT the flip side of this ShowofHands is that when you have a severely malpositioned baby, your body feels the pain even if the drugs tell you that you don't... so for me, I got the epidural etc when I got to the point where I knew any VEs etc would throw the focus that was working, and that led to a lovely calm labour yada yada but my back was severely damaged by the whole experience... I got caught into that lying-on-my-back-pushing thing that happens when you're being induced/have had an epi and no, couldn't feel a bar of it.. but it was still happening. I have an unusually shaped back, too, it's flat where it should be curved and so even on a good day I have a restricted range of back movement... I chucked a back-to-back baby on top of this and yes, great for me, I got the drugs.. but there was still fall out.

Hindsight is 20:20 vision. I enjoyed the epidural, it made the experience up until the birth absolutely fine. However, I wonder if I hadn't had it would I have moved more and perhaps not spent 2 hours and 30 minutes pushing on the flat of my back. I'd love to go back and shout at myself to GET THE HELL UP OFF THE BED! I ended up with a Kielland's forceps delivery having been prepped for emcs in theatre.

It's a bit 50:50 isn't it, I'm glad I was excused from experiencing the pain.. but I wish I had been able to work with my body a bit more to prevent damage that is still with me.

My mums had four, and says that when she puts her neck out, its far worse than labour.

(In fact, during her labour with me, she did the hoovering and washed the front windows, got to hospital at 10cm and my dad missed it lol)

For me it was like a bad period crossed with food poisoning. Stupidly I was looking forward to a natural labour and had packed my birthing music with aromatherapy oils, I think I thought I was off to Champneys.

I wasn't prepared for the vomiting and diarrhoea that came with each contraction. No amount of hypnobirthing or whale music could take away the mess and I just couldn't cope with being covered in my own vomit and poo so I opted for an epidural pretty sharpish.

I got to 6cm with no pain relief before I got to hospital and it was fine. I wasn't even sure I was in established labour and was worrying they would send me home

then i had gas and air which was great. i did end up having an epidural as we needed forceps so i dont know about the pushing stage but up to then it was do-able

good luck whatever you do - there is no "right" way - just what works for you

I thought it was the most painful thing I had ever experienced and I would rather jump in front of a train that go through it ever again.

But it was a very, very long complicated labour. I thought I was prepared. I was not. It is amazing how many people here haven't had a particularly bad time though, isn't it? If I was going to have another I'd take heart from that.

i had the v & d too Hazie - and had packed my ipod, docking station, massage oils and hair straighteners

they didnt get used :)

I remember with ds I was in a state of pre labour for almost a week. I was 3cm dilated for all that time and i just felt a constant period type ache. No pain as such. Labour started quite out of the blue with my waters going and then I agree it's like bad cramps you get with food poisoning, completely involuntary and pretty overwhelming.

SOH is defo right

I am not trying to be pessimistic or scare you. My labour wasn't normal. But it's worth knowing that it's nothing to do with pain thresholds (I have quite a high pain threshold

My dh thought I had a low pain threshold and was amazed by how I coped, I don't think mum really believed it till she saw me in labour with ds.

Was 9cm dilated by the time I arrived at hospital. Suspect that I had actually slept though the first 3-4 cm dilation but by the time I arrived there was no space between contractions and the pain was like being torn apart by wolves. Toothache, period pain etc did not, in my case compare.

The worst of it was that, with everything happening so fast and with the (useless) ante natal class having been told that first labours drag on for hours and hours I couldn't see how I could survive through all those hours in that level of pain to the end. If I had known that the whole thing would be fast (until he got stuck and I had emcs) I would have been much more able to cope. Gas and air had no effect at all but the epidural was fab

The only bit that hurt me really bad was the crowning i will just say it stings!!!

The rest for me anyway I could cope with i was in labour from 1 am weds night to 7.15 friday night, i dont really get bad period pains but for me the contractions were just like strong period pains I was having co codamol while having these though, but i suppose everyones different. I had gas and air when I was fully dialated and while pushing, that was the terrible part.

I have one friend who equates birth to bad periodpain. Everyone else I know would scoff at this.

It is much much much worse, sorry!

I think the most important thing that's been said is that every labour is different. I only have one dc, but I know women who've found their first labour a breeze, and their second a living hell. It has nothing to do with individual pain thresholds.

Like you, I have excruciatingly painful periods - I take Tranexamic Acid for 3 or 4 days, and I also take high dose co-codamol for the first day or two. This does mean that I spend at least 24 hours off my face, and unable to function as a mother, or go to work, but it's preferable to being on the floor screaming in agony for two days (and unable to function as a mother or go to work!).

But labour for me was nothing like period pain, and contrary to most women I've spoken to, I found first stage labour much more painful than second stage. With first stage, there's nothing you can do with the pain, and even though it only comes in waves, it was bloody awful. With second stage, the pain is part of the hard work of pushing, and I found that so much easier to deal with. My sister said she found exactly the same with both hers.

Don't know if that's helpful, but I'm afraid that my experience was that very painful periods don't prepare you for labour. The upside was that it's easier to let doctors know just how painful your periods are, and be believed, if you can compare it to labour pains.

Why don't they give people local anaesthetic in their fanjo so crowning doesn't hurt?

I found that too- much preferred the second stage as it felt productive, still involuntary but in a good way. There's no way I wasn't pushing, my body just did it for me, which is why I get so cross seeing people yelling 'push!!!!' on TV births. For me at least, there was nothing I could do to stop that urge. Transition on the other hand was the worst bit, but only in hindsight, if I'd known I was in transition it might have been easier to deal with. As it was, that was the point I decided I couldn't do it anymore and let the fear almost take over. Again, that was also physical, I remember starting to shake like a leaf.

so, you girls out there that know what its like to be in bed 3 days a month due to extreme period pains, how did birth compare to that for you?

I was one of those girls - my personal experience, pretty much the same level of pain as on the really evil months (the passing out, thinking you'd rather die than carry on type ones). I sat in the bath at the hospital until it got really bad and I did ask for an epidural but looking back that was transition as by the time I was out of the bath (suspect the mw was humouring me knowing full well what was happening) I was ready to push. DS was 9lb5oz and I ended up using the gas and air as a bitey thing for my mouth but not huffing the gas for some reason. My main problem was I vomited with every contraction (until they stuffed me full of cyclizine) but I threw up through pretty much the whole pregnancy in anycase!

My contractions were like period pain which got steadily stronger until I found that leaning on something and groaning on the out breath was the only thing I could do - it seemed to come instinctively, you know what you need to do.

Then I had pethidine cos even though contractions were coming every 1-2 mins I was only 2cm dilated so midwife thought it would relax me enough to dilate further. She was so right - it was like being drunk. The contractions became stronger but because if the pethidine I was able to manage the pain, groaning like a wild animal but not in a 'can't cope with it' way.

When the baby comes out it hurts like hell but it lasts a matter of 2 seconds. Then you just have to cope with the pain in the week afterwards as you heal up. For me that was worse as I felt emotional anyway and dealing with sore nipples etc makes you feel more vulnerable to pain.

The thing you can't do is know what experience you will have!

I'd prefer contractions and birthing to period pains anyday. At least there are breaks between the contractions unlike period pains. And then there's the lovely baby at the end of it all.
Also, bonus for me was that I didn't get periods back before trying to concieve my second child. So far I haven't had periods for nearly 3 years. (thanks to breastfeeding).

I dreaded my first childbirth and took all the drugs they offered. Never gave myself a chance to see if I could manage it. Second time I read lots of positive stories, relaxed and learned how to do the breathing. Labour took 12 hours without pain relief but never got as painful period pains.

Occasionally I get horrendously painful periods that remind me exactly of labour - so much that I almost wonder if I'm going to be one of those women who has a baby without realizing they're pregnant! So for me labour was quite similar but the pains became much more intense than period pains for the last hour or two when I was too late for an epidural. Labour didn't last as long as my periods though :).

Very painful, but manageable as they build up and do come and go.

For me the worst bit was transition. It was like a mythical thing you heard people talking about, but nobody was really able to define it. Once I had been through it I knew what it was, but even now can't really describe it! It's not the pain so much but the intensity and inevitability of it.

It's so different for everyone though and I have friends who said it was barely worse than their mild period pain.