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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Are 3rd births really as horrible as people make out?

43 replies

AwayinaKayzr · 19/12/2011 16:28

I'm expecting DC3 in June. Since getting pg I keep being told how 3rd births are awful, longer, more painful and more likely to end in a CS. After 2 pretty straight forward VB with one being at home, I'd really like another straight forward VB.

So please be honest and tell me the truth about 3rd births.

Thanks.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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moosemama · 19/12/2011 16:48

Not in my experience, dd (dc3) was born 1.5 hrs after my first contraction - including half and hour trying desperately not to push because the midwife insisted I couldn't possibly be ready and refused to check, as I wasn't dilating at all when she checked an hour before.

Yes it hurt, but then again I had no pain relief, as the lovely mw also didn't believe I needed to be on the labour ward.

In the end it was just a couple of pushes and dd shot out torpedo stylee, complete with her amniotic sac and waters, which then burst as she hit the bed!

Fastest and easiest birth of the lot.

By comparison, ds1 and ds2 were both back to back. Ds1 was a 3 day agonising labour, with epidural, ventouse and very nearly a CS. Ds2 was 24 hours-ish, just GA and a nice easy delivery at the end.

Same goes for my dsis and two of my friends. All of them have 3 dcs and in each case the third was the easiest and shortest of all their labours.

I was told similar horror stories about third births when I was pregnant with dd. Please don't worry about it, just relax and enjoy the pregnancy.

pooka · 19/12/2011 16:51

my third was the fastest and brilliant. No tearing, at home. lovely.

Waters broke at 9pm. Started contracting without pain at about 9.30pm. Was only painful from around 10.30pm. Midwife arrived at 10.45pm and ds2 arrived about 10mins later.

I did have a quick glass of wine and a couple of paracetemol at about 10pm. So that might have helped

pooka · 19/12/2011 16:52

Oh - the bit that hurt, really hurt (also no gas and air, no time). BUt was short.

lisaro · 19/12/2011 16:55

Bollocks! Why would people try to scare you like that? My 3rd was by far the easiest, though to be honest i've never been really good at the whole labour/birth thing. No blue light or 28 hr labour was a luxury for me lol. Seriously though, it was easier.

thisisyesterday · 19/12/2011 17:00

oh i keep hearing this, and it's just rubbish.
I think it's one of those self=perpetuating myths.... one person says "ooh, my 3rd birth was awful"... someone else "yes! mine was too!" and then it becomes FACT and everyone starts talking about their awful third births

I am fairly sure though, that for every bad 3rd birth story there are just as many, if not more, great stories about them too!

mine was fine. first was my worst, second was my best and third was in betweeny lol
ds3 was born very fast (48 mins from first contraction to holding him) and it was just really way too intense. but i wouldn't say it was awful

bumpybecky · 19/12/2011 17:11

my third was ok - different to 1 and 2, but not worse :)

#1 was attempted home water birth but had to transfer as meconium when waters went

#2 successful home water birth, easiest of the 4, start to finish in about 2 hours

#3 another successful home water birth, but waters went first and no contractions for about 12 hours, once they eventually got going it was about a 3 hour labour. I spent several hours not contracting arguing with midwives about lack of trained mw to do water delivery though, so bit stressful

#4 another home water birth, waters went several hours before contractions, again spent a while arguing about lack of trained mws, didn't matter in the end as ds arrived before they did!

3rd isn't always awful, in my case the bad points were nothing to do with the baby, more to do with staffing issues!

SantaAteAllTheBiscuits · 19/12/2011 17:18

ds2 was way quicker and less complicated than my first two.

However he ended up in SCBU for five days as he got a lungful of blood during the birth

like thisisyesterday my first was horrendous, second was a complete breeze apart from being long and third was meh... fast and painful on the one hand but quick on the other, and my only fully physiological birth (which as he was oxygen starved due to tachyclyptic breathing (sp?) may have helped him)

mrspepperpotty · 19/12/2011 18:50

DC1 was 28hrs from first proper contraction, 20hrs after arriving at the hospital, epidural, episiotomy.

DC2 was 3.5hrs from first proper contraction, 40 mins after arriving at the hospital, no time for pain relief, small tear (3 stitches).

DC3 was 3.5hrs from first proper contraction, 1.5hrs after arriving at the hospital, gas and air, no tear. Perfect!

Hope that helps!

LynetteScavo · 19/12/2011 18:52

3rd births are easy-peasy.

Lots of people told be it would be like shelling peas, and they were right.

hiccymapops · 19/12/2011 18:57

Everyone's different. I know some people that had it easier with their 3rd, and some worse.

Personally, mine was similar to my first 2, apart from I started contractions on and off two weeks before my overly comfortable dd decided to show herself . My contractions were slightly more intense near the end, but I still had a lovely homebirth, which I nearly didn't as she arrived just hours before I was due to go into hospital to be induced.

Anyone that's giving you scare stories when you're expecting are horrible and insensitive.

exoticfruits · 19/12/2011 19:06

I have never heard that! The 3rd was the easiest of all-and the quickest.

TheThingUpstairs · 19/12/2011 19:29

My 3rd birth was fine, first was worst.

TheThingUpstairs · 19/12/2011 19:30

Meant to add, 3rd birth was also quickest.

Original poster

AwayinaKayzr · 19/12/2011 19:50

This has put my mind at ease a bit. I didn't hear many horror stories with the first 2. But with this one the whole world and her dog have had awful 3rd births.

But hopefully after reading these replies it might not be all that true.

OP posts:

lockets · 19/12/2011 19:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SpringFlowers · 19/12/2011 19:52

I agree, I had a ten year gap between 2 & 3 but it was quick and easy. Arrived at hospital at 3.30 am, baby born at 5.50 am and I was home by 10 am. No stitches and no drugs. I did shout the place down though . My midwife didn't believe me when I said I thought I needed gas. She said it was 'too early'. Listen to your body, you know it best. Good luck!

Holdmyhand · 19/12/2011 19:58

My third was by far easiest - at home, just over an hour in labour - midwife didn't get there in time. Paramedics only just arrived as dd coming out! Less painful than other two. What I did find worse was after pains - bad contractions for 2 days after the birth especially when breast feeding. (would still do it all again tomorrow though!

chocolatchaud · 19/12/2011 20:04

I have heard that 3rd births can go very similarly to your first - which are obviously usually harder than 2nd.

However, my 3rd birth was definitely the best. I was in labour longer - very stop-start - but once it got going properly, it was very quick and I felt much more in control than I had with the previous two.

Don't panic!

beepbeep · 19/12/2011 20:05

third was quickest at 40 mins and water birth, 2nd was 3hr 40 mins & water birth, 1st 4. 20mins & on land(!)

I got told same thing and was little nervous, no problems at all! Good luck x

HattiFattner · 19/12/2011 20:06

my 3rd was easy-peasy, 1h45 mins from induction to delivery, gas and air only, no tears, back home to sleep in my own bed by 10pm that night.

TysTheSeasonToBeJolly · 19/12/2011 20:07

I only have 3 dc, but my mum had 3.
When my brother was born, she didnt know she was in labour till 2 hours before birth. It was easy and only one push and he was born.
Too quick though and needed oxygen but the birth was not difficult.

headfairy · 19/12/2011 20:08

moosemama your dd was born in a caul? You know that's very good luck!

sorry op, hijack over :o Cant' help you with third births, I've only had two and I didn't have to do a thing for either of them.

HattiFattner · 19/12/2011 20:09

my friend is sat with me. She was in hospital and told baby No 3 "wouldnt be making an appearance for a good 5 or 6 hours" and Dr went home....(USA) - her husband delivered baby about 40 mins later!

moosemama · 19/12/2011 20:15

Headfairy, yes. She caused quite a stir in the hospital. Lots of mw's came up to the PN ward to meet her when word got around.

Folk lore has it that babies born in the caul will always be safe around water. Not sure I should take that for granted though.

Toobluntforsleighbells · 19/12/2011 20:19

My third was totally fine too (as were the others). Not sure why, but it seems to me that where pregnancy & childbirth are considered, everyone feels the need to add something that's not particularly helpful. I'd simply say ignore, ignore, ignore!! All the best!

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