May I ask how long after giving birth did you resume having sex?

[MixedBerries]

And how was it? Did you feel "in shape" down there? I'm 8 weeks postpartum and my bits still look like offal! Kegeling all day but not having much effect that I can tell. Anyone divulging any experiences very much appreciated!

2 weeks, had 3rd degree tear. Was a bit sore, but not too bad.

Didn't feel as roomy horrendous as I expected following a forceps delivery and manual placenta removal, I did have fears that our sex life was pretty much over forever (no thanks to the MW on the PN ward who said 'you do know you'll never be the same again down there, don't you love?')

Took several months before everything felt 'normal' again though. Now DD is 22mo, and all seems to be in good order.

I think about 6 months. Had a emcs and stomach ached for at least half that time plus I was traumatised by the whole induction / birth and couldn't bare the thought of even dh being near me until then at the earliest .

After my first it was 11 days, after the other three it was about 6 weeks because I was so knackered. I felt back to normal 'down there' within 2 weeks with all of them apart from my last one, was sore on one side for months afterwards.

I had a really bad 2nd, went two way up and down with first and ebf and had similar to the others in tge same boar. Wanting to is half the battle. Just remember everyone is different and you can always stop.

My DD is 13 weeks and we gave it a go over New Year. Terrifying! I was also worried that it would be a complete disaster zone 'down there' but DH assured me it is fine. Haven't had another go since. Breastfeeding has been a big factor in this (don't want to drown him), but jumping onto what Fraktious said, is bfing known to have an effect on your libido? Because I don't fancy it AT ALL. And it isn't tiredness or anything like that, just plain not interested.

It took me nearly seven months. I had an episiotomy and a couple of stitches but the scar tissue was very sensitive so whenever we tried it hurt too much.

In the end I saw a doctor who (after checking me and saying everything was properly healed) told me that the best thing for it was to have very gentle sex with lots of lube and to see if DH could stay inside you but keep still as it would help stretch things. It still hurts a little now but only a little.

Hope that helps!

Mixed, sounds like I had similar to you. Episiotomy that extended to a 2nd degree tear, and took an hour and a half to repair in theatre. They said I'd escaped a 3rd degree by the skin of my teeth. And 4 hours pushing so everything was very swollen and sore. But it was all ok within 2 weeks. We tried to do the deed at 4 weeks, but was too uncomfortable, but by six weeks we were back to normal. My advice would be try to relax- the more you worry about it, the more you'll tense up, and then the more it will hurt- vicious cycle!

10 months and 16 months. TBH, have never felt like sex since. Just not interrested

3 months first time (gad 2 stitches) and 3 weekd second time (no stitches).
I had no pressure from dh as it was "lets see how it goes dont gave to go to the end iykwim. It was fine if I remember right, quite a while ago, but I rhink I woulc remember if it hadnt been!!

10 days but i had no rips or stiches and only gave birth to a 4 1/2 pound girl, everything was back to norm within a few days,,, i found the initiall "going in" stage was a little uncomfortable but after that i almost forgot i had only just given birth!! (sorry for TMI)

Also i am bfing and not to share TMI again but i still do get in the mood quite easy, i dont think bfing has any effect on your libido?

both my kids were homebirths
with 1st child - 13 days - with lots of giggling .www.mumsnet.com/te/2.gif..felt a bit dry kept it very light 7 playful.
with 2nd one 11 days - absolutely no difference from.
Didn't have any tears or nics with either

2 weeks both times but no stitches or anything

2 weeks for me, but had had EMCS so felt fine there and recovered v v well from section.

I'm scheduled for lovemaking this weekend. I feel ready for it, less self conscious, and am ever so slightly horny.

I'm almost 4 weeks post birth, and had forceps/stitches. Bleeding has stopped.

Up until about 4 days ago I thought i'd never feel ready, but am definetely feeling up for it now....for want of a better expression!

Ill be honest, I can;t even bring myself to look 'down there' for fear its all amiss, but it all feels ok!

2 weeks- everything felt fine though and I enjoyed myself- and I think dh did too so everything must have returned to normal

Use lots of lube if you're scared and take it very slow (when you find the time). Or just fool around together and then if you want to you can or just do it yourself.

Ooh stabiliser i think i would be more scared after a section! Assuming you didn't do it in the missionary position? What sort of time frame do the doctors give you after a section?

three months and then I was so "ow ow OW" that DH completely chickened out and I subsequently felt like shit

Sex has been more amazing since everything recovered but it took a good year for everything to return. I have several freinds who believe sex gets better after babies.

Take your time!

gets better? Or you lower your standards immensely? Suddenly the baby staying asleep and not throwing things at you from the crib while you try to get i discreetly on under the duvet seems like really hot luvvin

I'm a bit at those who do it after a week! I bled really heavily for weeks afterwards. There was no way I was going to let OH anywhere near me.

Kittens - I was on top and we went carefully. I was v lucky with my section recovery and by then did feel well enough. May also have been on a bit of a crazy mission to prove to the world/myself that I was not affected by c-section.

I dont know about the official advice from the Dr, as we'd already DTD by the time I saw one at the 8 week check up! But when I was discharged from hospital, and in subsequent midwife visits, the message I got loud and clear was that I was the best judge of what I could and couldn't do, as long as I was sensible.

my MW, on leaving the hospital, advised that the best way for me to check I was doing my Pelvic Floor exercizes well enough was to have sex.

I was at the thought of it so soon after birth.

I only know a couple of people with sections and they all had a hell of a time- glad yours went so well!

About 5 weeks, as soon as the bleeding stopped but I had ecs (which I was very grateful for when I saw the size of her) so had no problems down below. Feel so sorry for what some people have to recover from.

so guess nobody's found that it is their DP who doesn't want to do it?

I can't imagine him ever being interested again (I've not popped yet though but he's not wanted it for a long time and I can't imagine that, after seeing me give birth, he'll ever be up for it again).