Public or Private Hospital? What did you choose?

[LondonT]

Hi Mums, I need your help please. My husband and I are deciding between registering with Private Care for childbirth, or using the NHS facilities. My husband thinks £10K is an insane amount of money to pay for "normal" childbirth (we have private medical insurance, but it doesn't cover "normal" pregnancy). His rationale is that if there are any complications, then our private medical insurance would kick in. I, on the otherhand, think of course one would go the Private route if one could afford it. I want to have one Consultant care for me throughout my pregnancy. This is my first pregnancy, and the benefit and trust gained through regular and stable care from one medical professional is something I really want.

But, please tell me Mums, am I being unreasonable here? Is my husband right? Is Public care just as good as Private?

I was on the NHS for the birth of DS1. If I ever manage to get pregnant again we'll definitely go private. The Whittington was so hopelessly, hopelessly under-resourced that they couldn't even admit me to the labour ward although I was a scheduled induction. I had no choices over an epidural and no monitoring of the baby's heart rate for several hours, the midwives were too busy. I feel lucky we both got out of there alive! I don't think my experience was atypical for London hospitals, the performance ratings for childbirth facilities are very poor.

It's not about the fancy extras, it's about quality of care. If you've got the money and want to do it, I would. Quality of birth is very important in terms of how you'll feel about the first few months after the birth.

Patsy99, I think your experience is a lot more typical than you think. I can think of so many women who have spoken about very similar experiences. My colleague wasn't admitted till she was 8 cms dilated. She spent her labor going back and forth in the car. All this because the labor ward was too full and the midwives were too busy and distracted, so they misjudged how far along she was. Needless to say her DH was furious and gave them a piece of his mind. And needless to say it made no difference. A friend who lives in Kensington recently discovered she was pregnant. She was about 2 months along when she called to make an appointment with a midwife. She had several unusual symptoms and many questions, so she wanted to see someone for some clarifications.She was told she would not be seen before 3 months and when she asked why, the lady said "Well, you never know what can happen in the first three months anyway. Lets see whether all this goes anywhere at all." Not something a newly pregnant women wants to hear. Her next phone call was to a private doctor. I could go on with such stories, but I can't make it an endless post.

But OP to answer your question But, please tell me Mums, am I being unreasonable here? Is my husband right? Is Public care just as good as Private?
No, you are not being unreasonable at all. You are being cautious and that is never a bad thing. You won't regret going private, but you might regret going with the NHS.
Your husband is not exactly right. The NHS staff is just as qualified and experienced as the staff in private hospitals. The NHS care is unfortunately not as good. This is because the staff is too overworked and there are not enough midwives. Some of them have so much to deal with that they can't help being a bit careless or indifferent.
Lastly, this may sound vulgar but it is true. When you pay, you decide.
Although there will be rude,patronising and insensitive medical professionals in NHS and private hospitals. But in private hospitals you are in a better position to deal with them because you are paying and so you have the choice to simply tell them to off and get someone else.

Dancingwind, spot on. And you're saving the NHS some money!

BagofHolly,interesting point. Didn't think of it that way!

This time I am going private. NHS care everywhere is hit and miss. We "missed" by a mile last time! A friend gave birth 3 days earlier, same hospital etc, dream birth. The other 5 of us - nightmares.

No staff was lacking the appropriate expertise but there was no time to care, think about the impact of their words, and certainly no one read through our notes, added up the evidence and realised what was happening.

Private this time (Birth Team, Watford) so you do have the security of a proper NICU etc.

Dancing Wind - spot on. Everyone is qualified but the service is so over stuffed they cannot operate to a reasonable level of care.

Use the NHS and put the money in a trust fund for your child.
No the NHS isn't perfect, but it's perfectly adequate and unless you are very well off that's a lot of money. Child birth is a painful messy business, whether NHS or private, natural or Csection. But it doesn't last long. 10k for a bit more comfort for a few days seems very selfish and very poor value.
Yes private medicine is nice, I've used it. No crowded waiting rooms, appointments on time and somewhere to park, but I'm not sure it's any better. My NHS GP ended up prescribing me something that worked better than the private consultants ideas

Of course you can do as I did with DD2 and have a home birth with the nicest NHS midwives you could hope to meet

Startail, I understand where you're coming from but I don't agree. IMO, by opting for private care one is actually opting for better care for the baby as well. I've read stories in papers about a baby who couldn't be saved because a theater wasn't available and the mother couldn't be rushed for a c section on time. There was a story about a baby who suffered terrible injuries because a junior, inexperienced doctor used forceps since a more experienced doctor wasn't available. I think the baby lost his eyesight.
There have been several other such stories over the years.The overcrowding on the NHS can lead to experiences a lot more traumatic than one would imagine for not just the mother but also the child. Naturally, these cases are extreme but not as uncommon as one would hope.Someone posted that during her labor a fetal heart monitor was not available. So many babies are saved because the fetal monitor instantly picks up on when the baby is in distress. Thats how many decisions regarding ventouse, EMCS are made. I dont think women should be literally chained to one like they are in many hospitals, but it is important to have one available.
So the money is not just being spent on the mother's convenience. Even if part of of it is for the expecting mother's benefit, I wouldn't grudge her that. I firmly believe mommies should be allowed to think about themselves as well

Startail I would happily stay on an NHS ward and take in my own shower cleaner again - nothing about my decision is to do with comfort. It is paying for the MW and consultant to have the time to join the dots and avoid a baby this time with an appalling head injury which was 100% preventable if only someone had been given the time to read my notes properly (a medic/MW, not a lay person like me).

I agree 10K for a few days extra comfort is a waste. 10K for dedicated MW/consulant for months however.......

Katiebeau has beautifully explained what I was trying to say....

Baby nr 1 I did with NHS
Baby nr 2 I went private (but with midwife care led, not with consultants = £6K)

The big difference:

• waiting time in antenatal appointments. NHS was terrible, waited for hours sometimes!
• very personal antenatal care, you really get to know the MW-team. In NHS I've never seen the same MW twice. However, I did NOT think the NHS antenatal advise or care was of less quality though!
• biggest difference: POSTNATAL! On a post natal ward with 6-12 women on 2 MW's and some women seeing 10 family members at the same time during visiting hours in NHS was horrific! Specially for 1st time mums, struggling with BF, or generally feeling vulnerable.

For baby nr 3 I'm repeating private mid wife led care.

My advise for LondonT: If you have a preference is to go private, you don't need to spend £15K for a consultant if you're not high risk and with private mid wife led care, you still get the comfort of private, personal care.
You're in London, try Kensington Wing, the private wing of C&W hospital!

Startail, why is it selfish to spend money on private care? Not sure where you are coming from. If its your money then its yours to spend as you see fit.

Remember if you go private there may not be a paediatrician available so if something goes worng with the baby you'll be in a much worse sitaution than an NHS hospital with a neonatal unit. That's one of the (many) reasons I had an NHS hospital delivery. 10k is an unimaginably large sum of money to spend. I agree it depend son local set up but I would never in a million years have considered it even if I had the cash (DOI work in the NHS and have a wonderful local hospital with brilliant midwives and medical staff)

Sleepless - I agree for some private hospitals, but same goes for some NHS MW lead units re paeds assistance/SCBU etc - patchy. But I have opted for private within a large NHS hospital & the profits go back into the NHS maternity unit.

It is dependant on local set-up. The maternity care around here is broken to honest, the service cannot cope. All the staff are fine, just too much work to do things well sometimes.

Sleeplessinderbyshire, I don't know why you say there will be no paediatricians in private hospitals? In fact my collegue who had a baby in an NHS hospital said she had just one preoccupied midwife dealing with both her and the baby. Whereas, my friend who gave birth in portland had a consultant, 2 midwives as well as a paediatrician present during the delivery. The baby was handed over to the paediatrician as soon as she was born. I am certain all private hospitals have qualified paediatricians on call at all times.

Just to balance the argument a bit, I have had 2 equally great but very different births on the nhs. 1st time in an nhs midwife-led birth centre, it was lovely, same midwife throughout, all v calm, v clean en-suite room. 2nd time in a v big hospital (Watford), induction, saw lots of different midwives and stayed on a busy ward but the standard of care was still excellent.

I just see no reason to go private unless all your local hospitals are shockingly bad- why not see if you can visit one to put your mind at rest?

Just to balance the argument a bit, I have had 2 equally great but very different births on the nhs. 1st time in an nhs midwife-led birth centre, it was lovely, same midwife throughout, all v calm, v clean en-suite room. 2nd time in a v big hospital (Watford), induction, saw lots of different midwives and stayed on a busy ward but the standard of care was still excellent.

I just see no reason to go private unless all your local hospitals are shockingly bad- why not see if you can visit one to put your mind at rest?

Of course they have paediatricians! Where did you get that piece of information from Sleepless? When I had DS in the Portland he was seen by a Consultant Paediatrician who still looks after him.

There might be a paediatrician in some private hospitals, there won't be a NNU/SCBU/NICU and it's rare to have proper ITU/HDU facilities in private hospitals. In this area there is one consulktant paediatrician who does any private work at all and that's general paeds and not neonates and he would never be on call for a delivery

Sleepless, there is only ONE private maternity hospital in the country. They have a SCBU, a NICU, and I'm wondering how you think they, the labour ward, and the obstetric theatres might function without paediatrician cover? How do you think they would operate without HDU/ITU facilities? Seriously, google The Portland, and you'll be a lot better informed than your previous posts would indicate. What do you THINK private obstetric care is like? Claridges with drips?!

Sleepless,please stop going off topic, you are talking complete bollocks. Have you ever been to the Portland let alone give birth there? They have the best consultants in all fields on 24 7 duty. Like Bags says just google the Portland and I like her can speak from experience. Do you think I dreamt about the Consultant Paed that was in theatre with m eplus the 48 hours my DS spent in special care?

Indeed the Portland is very well equiped for babies over 30 weeks I think.

Paeds coverage can be very patchy in the NHS. I struggled to believe what I witnessed when the alarms rang in the paeds A&E for assistance on the maternity ward IMMEDIATELY - the paeds stood are argued who should go!!!!!! So paeds coverage not 100% on the NHS either.

at the Claridges with drips BagofHolly!!

Although I think the experience of other posters proves no issue with paediatrics/SCBU etc in private hospitals either

Another private childbirth debate?

Really?

Someone told me today that they gave birth in the portland, that it was known beforehand of issues with the baby which would require a paed. No paed attended because it was 5am and a fast labour. So even if you're paying for it, it seems nothing is guaranteed.

Money here is all in joint names. I'd feel that spending £10k so that I could have fluffy towels and a private room for 2 days was rather selfish and a very poor use of the families money.