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Original poster

Would you listen to the consultants advice

30 replies

kitkat2507 · 14/11/2010 18:11

Hi all, I recently had my 3rd baby via C-Section, my first and second C -Sections were emergencies, this one was planned, it was not a good experience there were alot of complications with scar tissue and I ended out being in theatre for 3 hours and lost alot of blood, after the operation the consultant a lovely lady spoke to me and advised I do not have any more children for at least 2 years! this has sort of upset my family plans as i wanted 1 more but not leaving too long between them (a year at most) what would you do, would you wait or go for it an hope for the best?

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ChateauDeLaShite · 14/11/2010 18:14

Well she is a consultant, so I would at least listen to her opinion. That's kind of the point of her. I think a year is very soon to be having another baby, especially with the scarring you will have. Give your body time to rest

Lorelai · 14/11/2010 18:19

I think advice generally is that you should give your body at least a year off between pregnancies (so a 21 month+ age gap) as pg puts so much strain on your body. I think especially with 3 CS already (and so 3 sets of scarring on your uterus) it would be sensible to listen to the experts.

tittybangbang · 14/11/2010 18:25

If you can talk to her again you could ask her to be a bit more specific about exactly what the risks of another pregnancy within the next 20 months are - get some figures off her. That would help you make up your mind as to what you want to do. We all have our own comfort zone when it comes to risk taking.

Bue · 14/11/2010 18:38

The WHO's advice is that all women space babies at least two years apart. Obviously this is more important in the developing world, where a woman may not be as well nourished and medical care may be severely. But it sounds as if your experience was awful, TBH. I would really, really consider listening to the consultant's advice.

AliGrylls · 14/11/2010 18:39

Personally I would listen to her advice and take it on board.

If I was in your position, the thing that would sway me would be the thought of putting my body under so much strain and the possible complications.

Bue · 14/11/2010 18:39

sorry, that's "severely lacking".

thefurryone · 14/11/2010 18:53

I would definitely take her advice as much as you may want another child you already have three and you need to consider what the risks of another pregnancy are to you and how this could impact on them.

If you are having doubts about her advice though it probably would be a good idea to speak to her again so that she can answer any questions that you may have.

activate · 14/11/2010 18:55

yes I would

phipps · 14/11/2010 18:57

I was in a fairly similar position. I had ds1 by emergency section then dd and ds2 by vbac. Having my second son was an emergency vbac in that we nearly died and my midwife advised no more children. We listened. Funnily enough we wanted 4 children too.

AuntieMaggie · 14/11/2010 19:01

I would listen to her too. My sister was given similar advice and it was explained to her what her specific risks were and why they were giving her this advice. So if you haven't already been given this infomration I would go back and ask.

UltimatePomBear · 14/11/2010 19:12

Definitely listen to her - she is giving you medical advice for good reason! Because you've had 3 CS your risk of serious complications is MUCH higher. It would be a good idea to be aware of them before you consider your next pregnancy

piscesmoon · 14/11/2010 19:16

I would definitely listen.

Poppet45 · 14/11/2010 20:15

It's so sad, but I think I'd listen too, a big bleed is the most dangerous risk you face and don't forget its uncontrolled bleeding which is the leading cause of death around the world when it comes to having babies. A big bleed is also the most common side effect of a section and gets more likely the fiddlier the op is. Frankly you have three little uns who need you.

VictoriasLittleKnownSecret · 14/11/2010 20:17

Please listen to her. Why do you think she gave that advice? It is to keep you healthy. You have 3 children who need a healthy mum. Don't gamble

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 14/11/2010 20:30

I would listen to her and I would probably have another chat with her so I fully understood why.

For example, why would it be ok after 20 months, but not before? Is it to do with scar tissue? The general strain of pregnancy on your body, or the strain of another surgery on your body?

Often, if you understand the reasons why, rather than just being told no, you are able to understand, make sense and reconcile yourself with the opinion given.

BoffinMum · 14/11/2010 20:36

I think this sounds good advice and I have heard it given to other people in similar situations as well.

It takes a good two years to properly get over a pg anyway, and if you've been through the wars a bit it makes sense to be kind to yourself and have a bit of a rest IMO. It's better for the kids in the end as well - having a sickly mum is no fun for them (as mine will tell you ... but that's another story).

eaglewings · 14/11/2010 20:42

Your 3 kids have a healthy mum at the moment, I'd get all info possible before going against the advice of the Dr if I were you.

japhrimel · 14/11/2010 20:47

Yes, I'd taker her advice. I'd also ask to see a consultant anyway to discuss whether more kids is a safe option - afaik, most doctors get concerned about doing more than 3 CSs or pregnancy after 3 CSs as the risk of rupture go up.

cory · 14/11/2010 22:27

I was given similar advice re a different health problem and took it. Yes, it meant a 3.5 gap rather than the 1.5 gap I would have liked- but on the plus side dcs still have a mum.

phipps · 15/11/2010 08:10

FWIW I got pregnant a second time 19 months after my first baby was born and I had a VBAC which went fine except for a retained placenta. It was the pregnancy 13 months after that the caused the problem. I was deperate for another baby but I was risking my life for another baby and could leave 3 children without a mum.

Listen very very carefully.

frakkinup · 15/11/2010 08:15

Yes I would listen. Be thankful that you were only given the advice to wait 2 years before another and not to never have another.

Dracschick · 15/11/2010 08:16

I have had 3 c sections and my last one was very difficult post operatively,I haemorraged afterwards at home and not being dramatic really did nearly die.....I was on total rest for weeks after,suffered infection after infection and was really poorly.

Dh says he honestly thought I was going to die.

About 23 months later,I miscarried a baby.
A baby I didnt know I was expecting (I was only about 9 weeks)and I absolutely in my heart of hearts know thats because my body wasnt physically capable or strong enough to sustain another pregnancy.

Sometimes you have to look at things and count the blessings you have.

3 sections is more than enough for any woman.

dikkertjedap · 15/11/2010 17:14

I would definitely listen ... another child might be lovely, but surely it is more important that your existing children have a mum ...

pinkyp · 15/11/2010 18:31

Yes i'd listen, see if there is anything you can do to help speed recovery / strengthen the muscles etc that might help. My sil got pregnant 3 months after her 2nd c-section and she was fine but your 1 ahead of her

thinkingaboutschools · 17/11/2010 20:26

Definitely listen. My friend nearly died as a result of not taking the advice of a consultant (scar rupture...)

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