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Cancer

Find advice & support if you or someone you know has been diagnosed with cancer

Seeing oncologist

55 replies

TeaAndStrumpets · 30/11/2024 11:20

My DB is elderly and lives alone. In October he collapsed while out doing his shopping. He was admitted to hospital and as well as infection they discovered cancer in stomach, liver and possibly lymph nodes. He had fluid round his lungs which we were told is a sign of the cancer spreading.

He was discharged home after a few weeks but had another fall and lay undiscovered for some days so was readmitted. He has gone in a few weeks from biking everywhere to barely able to walk even with a frame. He is extremely bloated - think Henry VIII. Breathing horribly laboured and bubbly sounding. At the moment he has been placed in a rehab home to improve his mobility. He would like to go home but his home is extremely unsuitable. Absolutely awful. Dirty and piled high with rubbish. Been like it for years, family never allowed in but he would visit their houses quite happily for family events.

OK my question is, while he was in hospital the second time my younger brother (after speaking to a doctor on rounds) got the impression that as the cancer was so widespread, it would be palliative care only and DB would not be seeing an oncologist.

Now we find out he does have an appointment, next week. So perhaps other DB is mistaken that our brother wouldn't need to see a specialist? I thought it seemed odd, but have no experience. It is so frustrating living some distance away, all my information is second hand. Please could anyone tell me if this is standard procedure? What can the oncologist tell him? The home he is in still haven't received his notes, so the system seems somewhat mysterious to me.

Thank you.

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Mumto42005 · 26/12/2024 12:09

So sorry to hear of your loss @TeaAndStrumpets. I’m glad he had a peaceful passing.

Sending you the strength to get through this sad time, and hoping 2025 is a peaceful, happy and healthy year for you and your family x

TheSpottedZebra · 26/12/2024 12:23

Oh @TeaAndStrumpets what sad news. Wishing you strength and peace for the coming weeks and months.

Do take care x

TeaAndStrumpets · 26/12/2024 12:33

@Mumto42005 @TheSpottedZebra Thank you both. It means a lot to be listened to.
Yes next year is looking very nice, thank you, lots of positives so plenty to look forward to. Hope everyone has a better 2025.

OP posts:
jay55 · 27/12/2024 00:06

So sorry for your loss. It was so quick but I suppose he had no real time to think on it.
All the best for a brighter 2025

TeaAndStrumpets · 27/12/2024 06:36

@jay55 That is so true, shocking speed but better than many worse alternatives. Thanks, wishing you a lovely New Year.

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