Sorry, this is long.
Mum is 92 and lives alone. She has carers three times a week.
She fell last week and was taken to hospital.
Outcome is stage 4 pancreatic cancer with a collection of fluid in her lungs presumed to be a malignant pleural effusion.
Mum refused “the big needle” biopsy and just wanted to go home.
She has been complaining of lethargy and weakness recently and has told me her weight has dropped from 80 kg to 65 kg in the last 2 years.
She is very tired and after showering ( with assistance and on a chair) she was too tired to do anything else. (Slept for 2 hours in her chair)
Her dietary portions are minute, we scrambled an egg with some tomato and she ate half of it. 1/3 cup of porridge for breakfast type portions.
Doctors say anywhere between 3-6 months.
My problem is I live 9 hours away and I have major surgery booked for 24/6/24. If I go ahead with this surgery, I won’t be able to travel for 4-6 weeks.
My gut feeling is to postpone the surgery, take long service leave and go to stay with her.
My hesitation is if she does get to 6 months, I will be living with my current condition for a lot longer.
i am seeking people’s experience in this situation and how long they think Mum will still be here?
many thanks for any input