AIBU to not want to ring the bloody bell

[Thehitskeeponcoming]

Finishing radiation today. IDC & DCIS. Caught early. Lumpectomy. No Chemo but did 4 weeks of radiation. Starting Tamoxifen in 2 weeks.

I don’t want to ring the bell and feel stupidly conflicted by it because I know saying no will create more of a fuss.

Suffer from medical PTSD prior to this cancer diagnosis so I’ve found it very difficult. I’ve also been sick with the other shit for long enough (hence medical PTSD) to know that this is likely not the end, particularly with hormone therapy starting soon. It just feels so fake and twee to me.

How did everyone else feel about it? And if anyone else feels the same, how did you decline gracefully or did you just go through the motions because it was expected?

@Thehitskeeponcoming It sound like we are in a similar boat, only I'm waiting to find out when my 4 weeks of radio will start. I for one will not be ringing any stupid bell, daft idea to my mind, but if it makes others feel better, so be it.
I got advised to take tamoxifen for the 5 years not long after the surgery was done so already having the joys of it - not too awful yet, insomnia and more aches, ankles maybe a tad swollen.
You do you, whatever suits.

It’s so strange that things get done differently for different people. I thought I’d start tamoxifen much sooner but my oncologist told me only to start once I was “back to normal” a couple of weeks after radiation had finished.

And I did not ring the bell… no pressure to do so either which was good.

Hi OP, I found it impossible to do and was in a similar situation to you whereby other health issues were ongoing and then I had all this to deal with too.

I read your thread last night but couldn't quite form the words to explain.

This radio programme today I feel is part of it; toxic positivity.

I was also guilty of toxic positivity to my self too. All the shoulds etc.

And a bc nurse. "You should be going it for a meal to celebrate!"

www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m00208bv?partner=uk.co.bbc&origin=share-mobile

So weird that cancer is “special” in this regard.

Yes this got to me in my context.

Yes @Ikeameatballlunch toxic positivity has a lot to answer for.

My SIL is big into toxic positivity to the point where I didn’t tell (still haven’t even told) her of my diagnosis. She can’t quite get her head around that some people will succumb to cancer, no matter how positive they are, how hard they fight or how much they want to live.

Plus the awful telegraph journalist “lesser mortals” story. I just despair.

Best of luck to you

Good advice, that’s what I would do, and another here who thought this was just for children to do.

I guess it might give hope to patients who hear it, so maybe I would, but with no assumption it was the end.

I think it a terribly insensitive "tradition". But of course each to their own.