Hello everybody, I would be interested in hearing your opinion on this situation. Apologies for the extremely long post.
My 9 year old dd has been bullied for the last two years including kicking, name calling, teasing because of her disability, the excluding of dd and running away from her(she is often on her own in the playground)and having a ball thrown at her head deliberately. Lately there have been two girls who have targeted dd. DD has low self-esteem now and never wants to go to school.
We have complained on and off about this behaviour via letters and meetings but respite only lasts for a short while before it starts again.
After sending a letter to the teacher and receiving no response, and after yet another kicking incident, my dh went in to the school from the playground whilst I waited to pick up our dd's and took them home.
He was outside the classroom when someone called out the first bullies name. He confirmed with the child who they were and said 'Leave dd alone'. He went into the classroom only to find that her teacher (yet again) wasn't there.
As he left, another teacher followed him out of the playground telling him off for what he had done, dh responded saying he didn't care anymore and that the school had done nothing to protect dd. There is no doubt my dh was het up and upset, but he is a shy man and it took a lot for him to go to the school.
He went into the school office to tell the assistant head that he had spoken to the child (there are three asssistant heads as current head hasn't retired yet - we never see him at school though). There followed a discussion led by dh about their lack of action where dd was concerned, whilst dd had bruises on her legs from the kickings they were deemed 'old' and insufficient proof. For all the other incidences there was also no proof so they couldn't do anything they said. These children's parents work at the school and we feel that this may have something to do with the two bullies getting away with their behaviour.
My dh received a letter from the actual head to say that dh was banned from the playground (where parents pick up their dcs) that he had terrifed two children and had used offensive llanguage and threatened teachers. It said that if he was to set foot in the playground again they would call the police. DH is adament he only spoke to one child, the two bullies are best friends though, as are their mums. He is certain he didn't swear, he admits he was upset but didn't shout.
The very next day after the incident the two children bullied dd again at school (if dh had terrified them would they do this?)
I collected dd myself yesterday and there was a police officer in the playground presumably waiting for dh to attempt to pick up dd.
We feel that they are victimising our family as we have found dd another school and they were already aware we are very unhappy about the two years of bullying dd has endured.
We feel they are attempting to smear dh's character. I have requested a meeting with the Head and said that their account is incorrect. However with teachers singing off the same hymn sheet, one of which the Head is having an affair with - (I know this through a teachers friend who used to work there). We feel we don't have a leg to stand on - they are definitely closing ranks. I am stressed but dh is very calm he just says ' I have done nothing wrong'.
The Head who is married, is recommending the assistant head (his lover) for headship next year. It is very hard to take him seriously when he is so obviously immoral and corrupt.
I know that dh shouldn't have spoken to the bully but it was a spur of the moment thing. Our dd has been upset for so long you just feel enough is enough especially when the school has been so unsupportive.
My main concern to be honest is the slur on our family and this account following them on to their next school.
If you have got this far thanks for reading, I really would appreciate your thoughts on this.