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Bullying

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Son broke both wrists

43 replies

reallyconfusedmum · 16/11/2017 09:08

My son has broken both his wrists after some boys did a prank on him that they call 'benching'. (Wasn't sure what it was so I looked it up on youtube).
IT was during a p.e lesson on the astro turf, after spending hours in a&e then fracture clinic the next morning I went into school on the Monday morning to see what they were going to do about it.
They took statements from students and teachers but nothing seems to be done except the child who pushed him over has been excluded for 3 days. My son is in a cast for a minimum of 6 weeks he is unable to sleep or do anything for himself and for a year 8 boy for your mum to come into the bathroom with you is really embarrising.
I am exhausted as I am up at all hours with him, I really am not thinking straight could anybody please help with any advise as I don't feel like school have done enough or any help easing his pain.
Sorry for the rambling but I am at my wits end

OP posts:
LovingLola · 16/11/2017 09:10

I would contact the police.

Whisky2014 · 16/11/2017 09:12

I would also contact police.
my this is so bad. Your poor son :(

Justbookedasummmerholiday · 16/11/2017 09:12

Agree with phone the police.

Moreisnnogedag · 16/11/2017 09:17

How old is your son? What are his thoughts? What is his background with these boys?

I must admit (depending on ages) I don't think the police will be interested. What do you want? What would make you satisfied with the schools response?

Whisky2014 · 16/11/2017 09:28

more the point is, if op contacts the police then the school may suddenly become more involved.

MsFrancis · 16/11/2017 09:28

Thanks your poor poor boy.

Police matter it's assault. Also contact governors and council.

Despicable behaviour.

I'd think about removing my child from this environment but not without ensuring the culprits are being dealt with.

reallyconfusedmum · 16/11/2017 09:28

My son is 12 a big lad but more of a gentle giant who see the good in everyone.
He knows the boys but not friends. Not really sure what I want school to do or even what I want to do have thought about the police but don't think they will do anything.
School say they are dealing with it but I don't think that 3 day exclusion is enough. I really don't know what I want feeling very emotional as I don't know what to do for the best for him

OP posts:
hatgirl · 16/11/2017 09:29

Regarding the personal care issues (although I know that isn't the focus of your post!) there are a few products on the market for people with restricted mobility to help with this it might be worth having a look at depending on what the issues are.

(E.g googling 'bottom wipers' will get you a number of products which are essentially bendy sticks that hold toilet paper/wipes!)

64BooLane · 16/11/2017 09:35

Poor you and your poor boy. Horrible thing to happen to anybody BrewFlowers

I agree you’d be justified in contacting the police. I don’t know what they will do, perhaps not much, but I don’t think making contact and asking for advice would be a waste of their time. You could do with an unbiased, informed perspective on the seriousness of what’s happened and presumably they can provide that. As a pp said, it might bring home to the school that their response has been inadequate.

Lindy2 · 16/11/2017 09:46

If this was done by someone you didn't know out in public it would instantly be regarded as assult where the victim had suffered actual harm.
Being inside a school doesn't change that in my opinion. I would be reporting this to the police.

OnlyTheDepthVaries · 16/11/2017 09:47

2 broken wrists is a serious assault. If it happened in the street you would call the police. I agree that the school should deal with minor cases within their premises and within their behaviour policy...but this goes beyond that. Call the police and ask them to investigate....your son has been injured.

RB68 · 16/11/2017 09:53

isn't the three day exclusion the worst they can do though. I would also want to know what they are going to do going forward to prevent this happening again (or similar). I would also be signing son up to Martial Arts of some sort to give him some more confidence and presence with the others

Ausparent · 16/11/2017 09:57

I would also contact the police. If an adult did this to another adult, people wouldn't hesitate.

They may be able to speak to the child and/ or parents and have more of an impression than the school might. Plus there is then a serious record of what has happened should things happen again once he returns.

Ausparent · 16/11/2017 09:59

I just watched a video on YouTube and second my own post by 1000!
Shock

Finola1step · 16/11/2017 10:05

Your poor boy! It certainly sounds like something really serious happened and you could speak to someone about it. Does the school have a local PC or PCSO attached who you could talk to as a starting point?

What is "benching"? The reason I ask is that ds is nearly 10 and I like to keep my ears and eyes open but have never heard of benching.

chocz · 16/11/2017 11:55

What is benching?

Mynametodaywillbe · 16/11/2017 12:04

If he has 2 broken wrists it's a serious assault but I'm still none the wiser as to what happened after googling.

chocz · 16/11/2017 12:05

Either am I.

What is benching?

reallyconfusedmum · 16/11/2017 12:15

It is were you are talking to someone and without you knowing someone else gets on their hands and knees behind you. Then as a complete surprise to you somebody then pushes you backwards. As you are unable to move your legs backwards you fall over the person on the floor.
Have spoken to police somebody is coming to talk to us about it.

OP posts:
endofthelinefinally · 16/11/2017 12:22

Definitely ask the police to press charges.
Get legal advice - look and see if your home insurance providers offer legal cover.
These boys have behaved appallingly.
I am so sorry for your poor son.
IME schools are dreadful at dealing with this sort of thing and will lie and minimise bad behaviour.
If your son is injured at school and needs hospital treatment the LEA has to be informed. It would be wise to check whether this has been done.

chocz · 16/11/2017 12:42

How fucking awful, your poor son.

I am so sorry this has happened.

I really hope the Police act.

Kursk · 16/11/2017 12:47

I had no idea what benching was until you discribed it. That’s a old prank I remember from school in the 80’s

Hope he feels better soon. Good luck with the police, however I also suspect that they will do nothing.

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 16/11/2017 12:55

Call the police, fgs. It's not really for you to decide "there's nothing they can do". It was a serious incident, and three days holiday exclusion really doesn't cut it as a consequence.

bakingcupcakes · 16/11/2017 13:03

I'd be fucking fuming and I'd contact the police. I don't think 3 days off is good enough although I don't know what I'd expect the police to do. I really feel for you both.

Lindy2 · 16/11/2017 13:34

I don't regard that as a prank, I regard that as a premeditated assult with actual bodily harm being the result. A criminal offence.