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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Made it to 3 months but it's all going wrong! Help!

36 replies

WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 08:10

OK, so I've managed to EBF for 12 weeks and I'm well chuffed with that! However it all seems to be going downhill and whilst I desperately want to carry on my confidence in my own ability to feed DD is plummeting.

I know this is a common worry, but I'm really concerned about supply. DD feeds every 2 hours during the day at the mo and I'm knackered, but what she needs she gets! She has slept 6-7 hours per night for the past 8 weeks, for which I'm grateful and until now it doesn't seem to have affected things.

First 2-3 feeds of the day are fine, but in the late afternoon/evening she fusses at the breast and makes highly amusing but worrying grunting noises! This makes me think my flow is inadequate and it guts me to think I don't have enough for her. There definitely seems to be less milk there than earlier in the day.

I work 2 eves per week and need to express for that, but she feeds so much now that I don't get the chance to express!! Aargh! What if I run out?! Can I use formula?? (I always express at work to 'keep things going'). Having said that, since she has uppped her feeds to 9 or 10 a day, I am able to obtain more volume when I do express, so surely all is in working order?!

She always takes both breasts for a min of 10 mins, max of say, 40 or so. Plenty of wet & pooey napppies and seems well in herself, but getting increasingly 'angry' re feeds (or lack thereof?)!

On top of all this she is only 10lbs! I can't tell you how sad I get when I take her to the clinic after doing nothing with my life but feed all week to find she has only gained 3oz! HV says I worry too much and that this is prob her pattern of weight gain.

Somebody help me! I have searched the archives for hours on this topic and the advice has been wonderful, but I just need extra reassurance. Please tell me I don't need to give up!

Apologies for the War And Peace post

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 08:20

Well done for ebf to 12 weeks
I'm afraid it does all sound normal to me. In general if she isn't losing weight and is having lots of wet and regular (though maybe infrequent) dirty nappies then your supply is fine. You say she is small and puts on weight slowly, but tbh if your HV isn't worried then I wouldn't be - she is probably right that your baby is just slow growing, my DS was the same. The angriness and fussing may be behavioural.

At 12 weeks I'd imagine your supply is OK if you want to supplement with formula if you're struggling to express, but it sounds like you and your DD are doing really well

StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 08:22

and working too - I'm in awe!
Forgot to say that at this age she's probably realised that when she's feeding she's not doing more exciting things, so that may account for the fussing.
DOes she feed through the night? What are those feeds like?

tortoiseonthehalfshell · 23/04/2010 08:24

3 months is a classic growth spurt time. She's ramping up your supply by feeding so often, and you're doing brilliantly feeding her on demand.

It's not going wrong! This is how it's supposed to work, you're doing a great job.

Lastyearsmodel · 23/04/2010 08:27

Congratulations!

Agree with SPB on all points - my DD rarely gauined more than 4oz a week and some weeks maybe 1oz, so when DS was born I didn't take him to be weighed as often - simple!

You absolutely do not need to give up - your DD is well, healthy and growing. Fussing in the evening is common - most people have more milk earlier on. You should be aware that if you do supplement, it may affect your supply. Your DD could be feeding a lot to up your supply for a growth spurt, so keep doing what you're doing and following your instincts. Night feeds produce a lot of prolactin, one of the hormones responsible for regulating your supply, so if your DD is sleeping at night, that could be why she needs to feed a lot during the day.

Good luck and don't worry, you're doing really well.

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 08:32

Aw, thanks for responding so quickly guys!! I'm the only BF mum I know and been feeling really lonely! It's only just started to 'not hurt' the past couple of weeks so seems a shame to give up, and besides I've gained a few cup sizes of 'booby weight' which has necessitated a new wardrobe (any excuse!).

DD sleeps from 11/12pm to 6/7am and does not wake for a feed in that time (neither do I TBH - yawn!). She tends to just feed like a monster during the day and will only settle for a sleep if I take her for a walk in the carrier. Good excuse to get out and about!

So you reckon Formula here and there if I'm out of EBM won't signal disaster?

Everyone else's baby just looks so huge!

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 08:35

at 3 months i wouldn't have thought so, but have no experience to back that up.
Agreethat if she's not feeding at night she'll be feeding loads during the day to make up for it

whydobirdssuddenlyappear · 23/04/2010 08:38

I think as well that 3 months is a pretty typical age for a growth spurt, which will lead to much more frequent feeding for a little while until your supply catches up. And catch up it will given that you're allowing her to feed on demand. Try not to worry. FWIW, it sounds as though she's growing much like my DD. Between 5 and 11 weeks, my DS put on 4lb. DD put on 2. It was fine. Just her normal growth pattern. Although I won't deny that it worried me at the time (particularly since my HV was less than supportive and expected her to be as huge as her brother). What are you and her dad like physically, and how did you grow as children? Might put your mind at rest a bit to compare her growth to that, if you can.

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 08:38

Just talking about it has improved my mood no end. Thank you so much - this site rocks!

OP posts:
whydobirdssuddenlyappear · 23/04/2010 08:40

x-posted with loads of people re growth spurt, need to learn to post more quickly...

RubyBuckleberry · 23/04/2010 08:43

Agree with everything everyone else as says You sound like you are doing brilliantly!

Fussiness very common - my DS useless at this age - different problem but had to feed him in a darkened room as was completely distracted!

Formula possibly fine at this age re:supply but can be a problem as your body will not produce that feed - can affect delicate balance of supply and demand. Not sure on that one...

Please don't compare your LO to all other big babies - we are all so different, enjoy your gorgeous baby - as has been said before, as long as happy baby (all babies have a fussy time y DS's was in the morning for a bit and we're now back to fussy 4oclock - he just needs entertaining ) wees and poos and gaining weight you're all good!

Enjoy your baby and feeding her - if its only just stopped hurting you might start to enoy it more and more

Also, 11/12 - 6/7 sounds great .

StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 08:46

yes I am of that too - my 7 mo still feeds once or sometimes twice between 11 and 5 And DS was even worse at times!!

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 08:52

Hehe, well I can't touch enough wood about the night sleeping!! I know it will change sooner or later!

Re the formula..just need to make sure she can eat while I'm out at work (just 2 eves for 4 hours). She has always had expressed before, but like I say, her demands are making that a bit difficult! I always express while I'm at work to keep production stimulated so I'm hoping a FF or EBM while I'm out won't do too much harm. I was a bit more worried about her gut and if formula is likely to upset her tummy! Any views?

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 08:54

can I be nosey?? What job do you do that you can do for 4 hours at a time and express during it??
Feel free to tell me to get my nose out!
Formula might upset her tummy I think, most people experiment to find the right one. Could you not express on the other days though and build up a freezer supply?

StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 08:55

sorry, that might is a genuine might - think it's as likely it won't

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 09:03

I'm a singer, so I'm able to very glamourously express in my car during my break between sets!

I did have a very nice freezer supply but she has guzzled it! I do express everyday. I used to get 4 oz from one breast in the morning and a further 2 oz from both in the evening, but DD wants both breasts in the morning now, so we are just left with the evenings and she needs a good 150ml per feed now. I'd rather stick pins in my eyes, but I may have no choice but to go with ff on a couple of occasions just till I can get my stash going again

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 23/04/2010 09:15

the only job I could think of was in a bar, I imagined you pulling a pint with one hand and expressing with the other

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 09:20

Hehe SPB! No, but my Medela Swing has a great rhythmic sound which I might use as accompaniment

Thanks again to you all, I hope I might be of as much help to another new mum in the future as you have all been to me today

OP posts:
ReneRusso · 23/04/2010 09:40

Walking(+singing)Boob, don't worry, the formula is unlikely to do her any harm, but if you supplement with formula, it will reduce your supply, unless you always express the equivalent amount. Maybe try expressing first thing in the morning. I know you say she needs both sides, maybe you could try feeding her off the first boob in the morning and express a bit off the second, then let her feed off the second. She may need to suck for longer but that will lead to an increase in your supply, even in one day. Babies are more efficient at extracting milk than breast pumps, so expressing on a full boob will make it easier, and she will still be able to get what she needs. Other ways to boost your supply are to make sure you get plenty of rest, drink lots of water and eat well.

KristinaM · 23/04/2010 09:52

as everyone else has said, its normal and you are both doing really well

i hesitate to suggest this, but given that she is sleeping really well during the night, could you bear to get up earlier and express then, when your boobs are full? I would be worried that formula will disrupt your supply and upset her tummy / make her constiptated.

another option would be for you to give her a dream feed about midnight

most babies her age feed several times during the night so i guess she is so greedy in the day to make up for it . i am that you have a sleeper but it does have its drawbacks..........

if i were you i would stop weighing her too. happy thriving baby with wet/ dirty nappies is a better indicator than scales

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 09:58

Thanks ReneRusso - I thought aboout doing just that this morning, but was worried about having enough left in the second boob to satisfy DDs ravenousness. I'l try tommorrrow and see how I go.

OP posts:
Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 10:04

Thanks KristinaM, yes I have thought about expressing in the middle of the night as the inconvenience of getting up in the small hours would be well worth it for he peace of mind.

DDs last feed is always around 11pm/12am so no dream feed needed then.

Yes, you're right I should maybe get up at 4 or 5am, express and go back to bed.

Some good ideas thank you very much!

OP posts:
Lastyearsmodel · 23/04/2010 10:08

It's completely up to you if you want to use formula, but don't do it because others babies seem bigger - it's hard not to compare, but it's fruitless. Your baby is designed to thrive on your milk - she'll follow her own growth patterns and as long as she's offered a feed as often as she wants one, your supply will keep up with her demand.

Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 10:20

Of course you're right Lastyearsmodel, but it's so hard to be rational! My HV did say this and even suggested that I get her weighed less often to avoid dwelling on it.

I'm feeding DD now and she's already making some very strange noises indeed!
like some sort of moaning. I can hear her swallow and see milk pooling around her mouth, so that's OK. I've no idea what's going on! She's farting a fair bit though!

OP posts:
Original poster
WalkingBoob · 23/04/2010 10:24

She's writhing about and twisting off the nipple...surely it's too early in the day for this?

OP posts:
KristinaM · 23/04/2010 10:24

she sounds very happy