Is Motherhood a form of oppression?

[pinkfizzle]

women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/article7070165.ece

I don't think so - and I get a bit sick of breastfeeding is oppressive - blah blah blah...

oh and how convenient that the author has a big stake in publicis - so is incredibly wealthy - so I'm sure she is really concerned about the wage and wealth gap between men and women.

Ah, sorry, I see you said 'after birth'- you're right, although you can adjust it, so you get 3 weeks before and 13 after birth.

Winny, the official stance may be to promote BF, but my bitter experience with DS1 was that they were pushing me to FF.

Auld, I have the same bitter experience from London where I had DD, so I guess you got to be lucky/unlucky

Is France like Italy, where they are quite supportive of BF only for the first 6 months?

I had a GP tell me to stop bf a year ago so I could regain my freedom; I pointed out that it was exactly my freedom that enabled me to choose how to best feed and enjoy my own baby

Enforced motherhood ebcause you don't have acces to contraception etc- probably. Chosen motherhood? Not at all

If you are doing the standard French thing of returning to work 10 weeks post birth and putting your baby in a crèche or with a childminder, it is hardly worth trying to breastfeed as you will need to switch to FF to meet the requirements of your crèche, and most childminders. Most nounous will expect you to FF your baby as well.

"to prevent les enfants from taking over their mothers? lives."

Er, heres an idea.... Don't have children??

Articles like this are dangerous. It could be interpreted by some as "the newspaper said it's OK to drink and smoke around my baby, and actually FF is better, so there".

I completely agree about the freedom issue - I never found it a bind to breastfeed as the alternative always seemed a lot more problematic. And after the first six months my DD used to drink from a little cup anyway, so it was dead easy for her to be left with someone else.

Do you know what I don't get?
Why on Earth choose to have a child, if your first concern after said child is born, is to "get your life back". If your life, as it was, is that important to you, then don't have children at all. Then you can do what you like, when you like, without the "nuisance" of rearing a child at all.

I totally agree with CrosswordGeek

While I completely agree with that, the cultural and societal pressure on women to marry and have children in France is much greater than in the UK. It's quite hard to understand unless and until you have lived in France.

Lots of women want a baby but need to get their life back. For most women getting your life back doesn't mean gaining their size 8 or the possibility to go clubbing every night, but to go back to work.
Also, can't see nothing wrong in having other things to do other than constantly care for your family, 24/7.

bonsoir, won't creches in france give babies EBM?

Elisabeth Badinter is more of the view that caring for your own baby at all is a terrible impingement on a woman's lifestyle.

I know women in my own generation like this. They come straight home from giving birth to a démarreuse, a maternity nurse who sits up all night with the baby to get him/her into a routine of sleeping and FF while the mother gets her figure back so she can resume public life. And then they have a nounou (even if they don't work) all week, who keeps DC in a strict timetabled routine of meals, park, bath, sleep etc.

No, no EBM in French crèches. You have no idea what an outrageous idea that is here!

I cba to read the article as it appears to be complete trash and I don't need to be annoyed that much - but I can say I don't find motherhood oppressive at all. Even bf'ing to 23m (my choice), co-sleeping with DS (my choice), not putting him into childcare (my choice and DH happy to agree) and being a SAHM (my choice, although I miss having an independent income).

My DS is the best thing that ever happened to me, the best thing I ever did [cliché alert] - how could I find that oppressive?

EBM is not allowed in French crèches, for health and safety reasons.

I kid you not.

Wow Bonsoir, I've never met women like this... though I've heard they exist

I do find motherhood a bit oppressive, if it has to meet the MN decalogue of perfect motherhood. And I adore my children.

for health and safety reasosn? Really !

I don't want to read the article, but I have to say that I did initially find motherhood oppressive.

I was totally overwhelmed by the 24 hour a day demands of parenting which left me no time whatsoever to be just me. For the first few months it seemed utterly relentless and there was absolutely no joy in it. Breastfeeding did not help as ds had reflux and would scream when fed but at the same time was incredibly hungry and I shudder to remember trying to express milk at work.

I was ashamed that I did not feel the way I was supposed to and could take no joy in the whole process.

Yes, Franca. All food/drink given to the kids in a crèche has to be prepared specially in the right conditions of cleanliness. No unhygienic EBM allowed.

My former neighbour runs a crèche here and illegally allows mothers bring their EBM, but everyone is sworn to secrecy.
It's the EBM resistance movement...

Lol Auld, I like this smuggling of EBM.

GooseyLoosey, great post .

Agree with Franca. Motherhood is frightfully wearing, I personally have found. I quite like it now, but I loathed being told that actually regaining your pre-child self is outrageous. I liked my life before children. I rather miss it. Still.

Oi motherinferior, nice to see you around

I minded, desperately, my shattered life and body after my first baby. No doubt this was Unwomanly of me, and makes me a worse mother. I suspect, however, that I was not alone.