Please tell me exactly why breastmilk is so amazing..

[Sheeta]

Was talking about this with a friend the other day, we know that BM is best for baby etc, but it struck me that I don't know exactly WHY..

I know it boosts the immune system, but don't understand how. I know it can provide everything your baby needs, but don't understand exactly.

I know I sound like a bit of a muppet here, but can someone please just give me the facts about the benefits of BFing?

IrishMaeve
Please look at your chart and make sure you are on a chart for a breast fed child rather than formula. My little one was feeding well but the HV said was not putting on enough weight and so I asked for a breast fed chart and lo and behold he was doing really well on that one. i think the charts they give out are the formula ones unless you ask for the alternative.
i reiterate if your child is well and happy and not loosing weight then generally no cause for concern

totally agree marenmj- for me the labour and birth we not nearly as much work as the first 8 weeks brestfeeding.

tanya3, a bottle at night could be a godsend for you. Be wary though - by the time I had BF fully established with DD I tried to introduce a bottle at dinnertime and she wouldn't have it. She would only take the formula from someone else IF I was out of the room and she couldn't hear my voice.

It became such a PIA. Now she only gets bottles on days she is at nursery.

Jennifer I agree. Breastfeeding is hard work and it often seems to me that formula can be an easier option.

I am not convinced at the idea of trying to sell breastfeeding as the easy option. I have been lucky both times in having relatively few problems but it was still hard work.

However, disciplining my toddler, toilet training, pregnancy, birth, teething, tantrums...they are all hard work! I dont understand why people think otherwise - being a mum is hard (by the way I am not directing this comment at you I am agreeing with you if it comes out wrong).

I think sometimes life / being a mum is so hard these days that if people get the option to do things an easier way then they choose that way even if it isnt actually the best option for all involved. I for example use disposable nappies which I know arent best but the extra work is just too much for me. Its the same part as me that gives my 3 year old crisps because he wants them and I know they will keep him quiet for 15 minutes!

With regard to breastfeeding...it is hard, but for me the effort was worth it for the benefits for my children and secondly for me, the environment, cost etc. I am also lucky that I have had good supply, nipples didnt get cracked etc so it was easier in that respect. I realise for many people it can be more difficult which is where the support is so badly needed.

Our society today is fixated on things being easy. Whenever I make a decision that I feel is best for my children but hard work for me I get raised eyebrows and 'more fool you' responses. I feel almost apologetic for doing the best thing for my children. If something isnt simple people dont seem to want to fight for it anymore. On a non breastfeeding note people often ask my why I continued with my phd alongside 2 children and a job when it was hard and dont seem to be able to see the long term picture.

I am not saying we should make things difficult for every mum. Pregnancy, birth, sleepless nights...we cant get out of those as such - we have to do them. How you feed your baby has become a choice though and unfortunately breastfeeding is not, at the start at least, the easy option. I saw friends who FF having a full nights sleep, others feeding the baby, going out for the evening and leaving baby whilst I was responsible for this frequent feeding, not sleepign little bundle. Even now at nearly a year it is complicated as I have returned to a full time job some distance away and I am determined to feed her morning and night and am trying desperately to work things around that - at the deficit of my health and well being no doubt. The 'easy' thing to do would be to stop but I still see a benefit to her to be breastfed.

If we lived in a society where we had people around to help us - someone to cuddle the baby whilst a nursing mum slept or to do all the housework etc so she could just rest and recover and feed her baby then things would be easier. If we had the knowledge and experience of breastfeeding so problems could be spotted and worked out...if we had a society that valued breastfeeding and encouraged mums then it would all be easier.

I think one reason why some mums stop breastfeeding before they are ready is because they are shocked at how difficult it can be and its not always the serene easy option. I think if women were prepared for what it entailed then mums would be accustomed to this and prepared to do so. They would realise problems can be common and know where to go for support.

That was some ramble wasnt it! Have forgotten the actual topic of post lol. Just something I feel very strongly about.

Totally agree with all the comments about making sure women are prepared for the realities of breastfeeding, both positive and negative.
That the 'negative' realities are that it is likely to be painful and difficult for the first few weeks. You just have to get on with it and get through it (with lots of pampering and encouragement from those around you), because it will get better.
The positive realities are that when you do get the hang of it, it is relaxing, relatively easy, and the feeling of nourishing your little one from your own body is pretty exhilirating (at least I thought so).

I always imagine an intelligent alien landing in the middle of Britain (bear with me!), and asking what we humans feed our young babies and toddlers. We say: ' Well, there are two methods. The first has been fine-tuned over milennia to provide the exact nutritional and defensive qualities for optimum growth, it's at the perfect temperature, it simultaneously provides emotional (via hormones and contact) comfort for both mother and baby, it exercises the child's facial muscles to promote development, it's sterile. Oh, and it 's free.'
And the alien says ' wonderful, so obviously that's what most people do?'
We say, 'actually no. Most people here pay money for an inferior substitute, based on liquid from a different species, and linked by research to a higher risk (compared to breastmilk) of infection in babies, adult gastrointestinal disease, adult cardiovascular disease, cancer and diabetes, and possibly reduced potential IQ in the population as a whole.'
The alien goes home and reports back that we'll be a very easy target for takeover!

Seriously though, before I get rounded on by mothers who have tried to breastfeed and have found it impossible, I am not having a go at you. I am bewildered and saddened by the fact that, as someone else pointed out, we are living in a society where there is a combination of a) not supporting mothers starting to BF (by being realistic about the initial discomfort), b) a status quo where the medical alternative is the most used, c) there is an almost allergic response to a bit of self-sacrifice - as peppapig says, that is pretty endemic in every aspect of our society. We are all guilty of it, in one way or another.

Well, I agree that part of it is an allergy to things that are hard (why isn't being able to BF a source of pride?), I think part of it is that it's very comforting to be able to buy 'things' for baby, and bottles are so very associated with a baby. I remember I found out my mother was pregnant with my sister because I found bottles in the cupboard.

I bought bottles when I was 5 months pg even though I intended to BF. To this day I couldn't tell you what I thought I was buying them for... you just have to have bottles with a baby! I never had any formula in the house until DD was about four months, but I can definitely understand the desire to FF, just a little, when BFing gets really hard, and if you've already got the kit in the house it's got to be nearly impossible to resist the temptation to give your body a break - then milk production falls and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I cannot stress enough though, the difference coming from a community where BF is the norm makes... if midwives hadn't asked me how I was going to feed the baby I would have never actually thought about NOT BFing. Where I grew up the only reason a baby got formula was if someone else was sitting for the night or if baby was in daycare. I don't know the answer though (other than more hard truths from midwives/HVs and REAL support feeding through acknowledged/normal issues). I definitely would NOT want the other things about the community I grew up in, even though BF-as-norm was one of the side effects.

I totally agree with the post earlier about the onus being on the formula activists to prove that formula feeding is as good or better than breastfeeding. Breastmilk is what babies are meant to be fed on. There's a whole host of benefits to the mother - causes womb to contract and reduces likelihood of heamorrhaging, releases soothing hormones, can suppress periods and reduce likelihood of anaemia/naturally space pregnancies, can help natural and healthy weight loss, thought to protect against some cancers, rheumatoid arthritis and heart disease, as well as the baby - as detailed above, as well as being free and available on demand.

Breastfeeding is horrible (and nice) for most people at first but so is having a little baby. If you feed for a long time then that period of difficulty is soon forgotten as is the pain of labour and the sleepless nights. Why should it be an individual's responsibility to remember that particularly rubbish bit just so they can warn pregnant mums? If you ff you have all the faffing as long as you have the formula so the negatives are in no way comparable.

The media do show breastfeeding. They show mums breastfeeding for a couple of days/weeks then giving up because it is too hard. They show women having to go upstairs and kick people out of the house to breastfeed and feeling they can't go out because they will have to come home to feed. They show women being chucked out of restaurants for feeding and arrested for indecent exposure and feeding their children for a number of years under the header 'freaky feeders' or the like. There are many representations of breastfeeding in the media, they are generally overwhelmingly negative or very very occasionally - theme parky positive.

I think people need to be more honest with each other (and themselves too). In our rich western society there is rarely a situation where a mother's milk is not enough for a baby yet this is something repeatedly droned on about by the HV/midwives/grandparents/other mothers. If all the people who had given up because they 'couldn't' make enough milk for a hungry baby really couldn't then there would not be a single baby that survived in the third world.

I'm aware that lots of mothers have been told this by 'professionals' but this simply cannot be true in the majority of cases (babies/mums having been in special care, breast reductions and absolute starvation of the mother being exceptions) and only undermines breastfeeding in general. I suspect lots of times what has actually happened is that the milk supply has started drying up after the mother has started supplementing with formula.

I'm sorry but a few of the more recent posts sound really condescending about women who decide to stop bf in the first few weeks, whatever the caveats stated about 'not having a go'.

The idea that women stop bfing because they are allergic to a bit of self sacrifice really pees me off - motherhood is all about self sacrifice and the vast majority of it is done willingly, daily, but there are limits. Who are any of us to judge those women that could list a million other things happening at the same time as they're having trouble bfing that lead them and their partners to decide (after much agonising and guilt in most cases I'm sure) to introduce formula. I doubt invalid selfish reasons are top of the list in many cases (e.g. getting body back, sex life or whatever).

I think being able to bf IS a source of pride in our society, and not being able to is a source of massive guilt and shame, whatever people say when feeling defensive. I'd be amazed if many intelligent, hard working, sacrificing mothers give it up or choose not to without a lot of heartache and soul searching.

So if we can avoid high horses in this thread that would be good. no need to make people agonising over this decision feel even worse about it - trust other mother's good judgement of their own circumstances before wading in with generalisations.

(from a 2nd time mum who bf 3 months for no. 1 but had to stop after 5 weeks with no. 2 due to many & various reasons, and has many friends who similarly have been unable to continue as they wanted to second time around and feel similarly to above).

marenmj said it too. It's such a selfish attitude to give up breastfeeding because it is hard or horrible in the beginning. The same people don't have their babies adopted for waking in the night do they? People might call me a smug breastfeeder but I think that just makes me entitled to say these things.

I've breastfed two successfully until they didn't want me anymore. I didn't have it easy. My first was born after a 60 hour labour while I was with an abusive partner who wanted me to take the baby into the lounge to feed him so I didn't disturb his sleep. I have an inverted nipple which I fed from. Both nipples scabbed over repeatedly, I cried constantly with desperate exhaustion when the baby woke for milk, I had blocked ducts, the same eye watering, jabbing pain and babies that enjoyed biting. I was a single mother with a 15 month toddler with the second and I had all the above and an infected breast and still carried on so I don't think many people can talk to me about finding it hard and me not understand.

I could have had formula milk for free and already had a steriliser and bottles - a baby gift from those who had no faith in my plan to breastfeed, so could have switched if I chose but I did not supplement once with formula. That makes me incredibly proud of myself (and a little smug). Breastfeeding is easier in a practical sense but it is not easy. I would have hated to have to go home because the bottles had run out like some of my friends or to have been tied to the sink endlessly cleaning and sterilising.

AGD - I don't think anyone has a problem with switching to formula as a choice (for 'bad' or 'good' reasons) or because a mother finds it difficult or because there are other factors involved that make it less preferable but it is still a choice that people make.

It's a load of rubbish to say it was forced (on the most part). There's no problem with making that choice, just with lying to yourself and other people that it was somehow impossible to breastfeed. It undermines other people's attempts to breastfeed if they hear people saying things like (not you, something I commonly hear) "I've had to start giving him a bottle at night because I don't have enough milk, he's just so hungry!"

That makes people believe that a mothers milk might not be enough when it just isn't true. It'd be much better to say "I have started giving him a bottle at night just to give myself a break, he's just so hungry!" which is more accurate.

AGD - Thinking about it this culture of pretence is probably borne out of a mother's guilt and shame at being unsuccessful breastfeeders. We are fortunate to have a good nutritional alternative in the form of formula and no-one should feel guilty about switching for any reason but it is harmful to pretend it is anything other than a choice. It undermines the few who genuinely have no choice and the ones who are finding feeding difficult.

CK, after all of the problems you have had with bf, why do you still believe that bf is easier than ff? And yes, lots of other aspects of parenting an infant are hard, but generally people expect things like sleepless nights as people who already have children talk about it. I had no idea that bf would be hard, and I had watched my sister bf 4 dcs by the time my first was born!
By the way, I bf ds for 22 months, am still bf my 6 month old, and for 2 months tandem fed. At no pint would I have said it is 'easy'.

that last post made me sound v negative, I love bf, my babies have thrived, and as seen earlierin this threaad, there are loads of benefits

I can't say that I agree that by BFing a mother has earned her smug stripes any more than a mother who had a really difficult labour can be smug about that. At the end of the day the baby is born and the baby is fed and that's what's important. We have an unimaginable luxury to have the time and resources to be able debate (on the internet no less) about the benefits one way or the other.

That said, with the luxury of choice comes a responsibility. It is my responsibility, as the woman bearing and raising a baby, to stop sniffing glue and eat a vegetable now and then and make sure that DD is bathed on special occasions and at some point knows her address and that boys will only lead to trouble. This is what I signed up for the moment I got the positive test and decided to go forward with it.

I don't think any mother should be judged harshly for deciding to FF. Mothers should be supported regardless (because hey, we need it) and there should be enough general support, as a society, that a mother wouldn't consider formula unless she really genuinely had no choice.

(btw, I would vote that if you agonised about the choice to FF you would be classed as one of the ones who genuinely needed it...)

tiktok sorry! I hadn't read this follow up, I just read the misreporting.

I am a really big fan of bfeeding but I think few women have enough support to make it a realistic option.

You need tons of help immediately following labour/ stitches, you need someoneat once, not three days later. nhs won't spend what that would cost.

I persisted because my m and s are born again evangelical bfers. If i hadn't Icouldn't have faced them.

sorry dd kicking keyboard away!

lol, I can't answer for ck, but the moment I decided formula wasn't worth the trouble was when I found out feeds had to be prepared with water that had to have been boiled in the last 30 minutes and then cooled enough for baby. I thought, well screw that... baby is hungry NOW and popped out a boob.

I think it may depend on how you feed. I'm feeding 'on demand' and couldn't accurately tell you to save my life how often or how much DD feeds so to switch to a schedule where I need to make sure DD gets x ounces every x amount of time would be a real hassle. Obviously if you BF to a schedule (as my mother advised me to do) formula would be a lot easier to manage as you could be prepared before baby is screaming down the house wanting food. Or buy pre-prepared formula.

curiositykilled - yes, of course you can have pride in yourself for managing to get through the hell that was the initial period of BFing for you. Smugness? Yes.. if you want!

but to say that 'It's such a selfish attitude to give up breastfeeding because it is hard or horrible in the beginning' is pretty harsh.

personally I hated BFing. I truly hated doing it. I hated every second of the stabbing needly pain. I had blocked ducts and thrush. Bleeding nipples and amazingly painful boobs. I persevered until I started to hate my beautiful baby. Until I couldn't bear to have him near me because of the associated pain. I didn't want to hold him, even when he was sleeping, because I knew that sooner or later he'd wake up and need to chew my nipples off again. I would have rather gone through labour without drugs, and the MROP of labour again than go through another BF.

The relief when I expressed 3oz of milk and he guzzled it down was immense. I continued to express for a little while, but in the end I chose to FF.

One of the reasons I started this thread was to try and encourage me to see it through next time, and to seek more help in the early days.

maren, well said about luxury of choice, we are so lucky to have an adequate alternative to breastmilk to give. And of course clean water, electricity etc to make it safe.

Sheeta that sounds awful.

I used to put a little of the numbing germolene on my nipples after each feed. It took away some of the soreness and killed the bugs and I just made sure I washed my nipples well before the next feed. My SIL recommended a baby-safe lanolin because it acts as a barrier so you don't get infections/dry skin, but I found it gave my DD spots on her face so I just stuck with antiseptic and a bit of bottom butter.

Totally at a loss now that she has teeth! She's very conscientious when she feeds (because she knows teeth=surprised shouting and her milk being taken away ) but if she gets a bit dozy she tends to forget and has bit me hard enough to draw blood.

hi
The thing I don't understand with breastmilk and immunity is this: All proteins ingested are broken down in the gut, and as antibodies are proteins they too will get broken down so how do they actually give any immuno protection?

I know that breastmilk is supposed to be good for antibody transfer but How?

Any fellow scientist out there wondering about this?

I don't get angry / look down / feel smug if a woman tries breastfeeding and chooses to stop because she has problems or simply wants to. I get angry that often mums want to carry on and simply find it too difficult - I dont mean the mums give up because they cant be bothered but simply because it is too hard for them as they dont get the support that they need.

I was criticising the attitude in society that if you find breastfeeding anything but easy you should use bottles. There are so many stories on here of women having problems and their HP's just saying use formula or not giving support. There is no help which is what makes it even more difficult.

I am also criticising the portrayal that breastfeeding is easy because it isnt. Of course not every mum who stops breastfeeding does so because they cant be bothered although there will be some mums who cant be bothered which I find slightly strange.

I cant see any criticism in anyones post against mums who stop breastfeeding just admissions that breastfeeding is difficult!

lily - your question was answered by pooter a day or so ago Scroll back.

i had a dreadful time bf my boy after a horribly long labour ending up in a CS. I ended up mix feeding but then with advice on here and kellymom.com managed to get back to bf 100% at wk 10.

i am still feeding him at 2.5yrs and the more i read about BF and formula companies, the angrier i get that women are not supported properly and made to feel that there is something wrong with them, when in reality bf can be difficult and painful before something 'clicks' and it becomes wonderful.

thats why ive just trained as a peer supporter and will be one of a team of volunteers who will be going into the maternity wards to help any new mum who wants it. i dont want anyone else to feel inadequate or guilty when they are in pain and doing their best. in most cases all that is needed is a couple of suggestions about tweaking what they are already doing. Why doesnt this exist in every hospital, and why wasnt it available to me when i was desperate 2.5 yrs ago???

(soz - bit of a rant there )

"nhs won't spend what that would cost".

It's not just about medical care. The majority of women around the world breastfeed without the difficulties we experience in the west, without the advantage of any free health care at all, and while caring for larger families.

My personal feeling is that most people give up because they are made to feel that in all truth there is little point in their continuing to struggle on when breastfeeding is tough going, and artificial feeding is an 'easy' and immediate alternative (in the sense that it's omnipresent and financially viable). And we are simply not geared up emotionally for the intensity of breastfeeding

Too true Sabire. As soon as people talk about the importance of preparing women for the fact that b/f can be painful and difficult, I think uh-oh, for women who aren't familiar or comfortable with b/f that's going to cause major stress and make it painful and difficult. Better to say - Right, it might not be as straightforward as you think something so natural will be, but remember these key facts (good latch, how it's a pumping action and not a sucking mechanism, how to check baby is feeding properly etc.) and here are some numbers for b/f counsellors, and if you want to do it you'll be absolutely fine and have plenty of support.

A friend who's a b/f counsellor for LLL says that b/f is really the 4th stage of labour - so if the first 3 have gone well it's bound to be easier but if there have been difficulties with labour and birth it could well be initially problematic. Makes sense, esp for first-time mums who are a bit shell-shocked about the whole thing.