Calling over 1 year bstfedders-how the hell do you stop?

[dropinthe]

I'm actually getting really upset by this.Why,oh why,don't HVs/Dr's tell you that when you breast feed in the long term you are going to end up with manipulative,militant,spoilt and brattish toddlers that will do ANYTHING to get you to feed them when you want to stop.
I AM DESPERATE!!
It doesnt help that ds2 co-sleeps with us so has titty available whenever he wants and also associates going to sleep with boob-I know I have made my bed..I just wish I knew where to begin.
Do I concentrate on cutting out the night feeds?
Do I concentrate on the day feeds that get him asleep?
Or the loads of comfort feeds he demands whenever he is upset/bored/whatever in the day?
Do I get him in his cot first?

He takes bottles of cows milk from dh when Im at work in the evenings and weekends-he will nick ds1 bottles from him-he will take a few glugs of bottles I give him but on his terms,picking it up when he wants, not when I give it to him.

I am at my wits end and am pulling my hair out now-I would give anything to leave him with someone for a few days if I thought he would forget about my milk at the end of it-could this work?
Ive asked you all similar questions before but now there is an urgency about it as I cant bear his endless screams when I refuse him-I leave him or cuddle him as much as possible but it doesnt work-he just crys and crys and crys and its driving everyone else in the house crazy-I feel like everyone is blaming me for doing it this long and I'm getting my just just rewards!
Sorry to ramble but this is making me really depressed-I'm crying and shouting about it everyday-its also playing havoc with my menstrual cycle with periods coming and going whenever they want-Ive just started one two weeks after finishing! Hormones are obviously buggered.
PLEASE HELP ME!

Tiktok, the doctor who prescribed them to me is very experienced and one of the best doctors in my area. I was desparate to stop and I needed to do someting. Although I wasn't told about any possible side affects I would still of taken them even if I knew.
And btw I had no side affects at all. He gave me 30 tablets (if I remember correctly) but I didn't take them after my milk stopped.

don't those tablets run the risk of your milk drying up even for future babies? or is that just the older ones?

i really think a more gentle approach is better if you can at all manage it- am currently gently ramping down the bf with dd3 aged 12.5 months. it's much harder than with my other two, they stopped at 10 months and it was easy, but now dd3 minds more. we are doing 2 feeds a day for the last month and it's working, she's getting less bothered about feeding. but i have to be quite rigorous about not offering any other feeds in between.

Just to add my bit, I am finding that if I can capitalise on any slight change of routine that might be going on anyway, it seems to give some sort of 'structure' to the giving-up of feeds so that it's not just an 'absence' of something good. For instance, we spent the weekend with my SIL and her 3 young children and the general whirl of activity meant that it was easier for DD not to think about feeding during the day. Now back at home, we have the experience of napping without a feed beforehand and it's easier.

Know what you mean but I can't be out of routine all the time-there are still many hours like now when if I dare to come on here for longer than 10 mins ds2 will cry for a comfort feed-its these that are the hardest to give up/stop/deny/distract!