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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

I really want to try to get BabyG into some sort of <cringe> routine. Any tips?

46 replies

MamaG · 26/01/2009 14:26

He's always been BF on demand. I'm crap at expressing (historically) and don't even want to try yet with BabyG.

He always has to be fed to sleep and there isn't really any set routine to his feeding/sleeping.

I could really do with knowing that between X and Y I'll have some free time to do stuff around the house while he's sleeping, instead of him having catnaps all day.

Am I being unrealistic? His feeding is hte most important thing to me and I don't want to jeopardise that at all but surely htere's something I could do?

All tips gratefully received and considered (apart from MIL's "give him some formula" )!

OP posts:
nailpolish · 26/01/2009 14:30

i found evening routine easy to figure out
bath at 9pm
feed
sleep

the rest of the day (23hours of it) was all to pot though

nailpolish · 26/01/2009 14:31

yoou do know that as soonas you get into a routine on day 4 baby will dramatically change it all around dont you

just go with the flow mamaG

Original poster
MamaG · 26/01/2009 14:32

lol

Yes its the day I want to "control" (for want of a better word!)

Nights are fine

OP posts:
NormaJeanBaker · 26/01/2009 14:33

For your MIL - my children were FF on demand from a couple of months and I still spent most of the time doing that so her solution isn't likely to change anything anyway. Unless she means forget the 'demand' side of it, feed every four hours like clockwork and stick him in the garden the rest of the day to exercise his lungs and get some fresh air. Then you'd be free to make some souffles and prepare a gin and tonic for DH when he gets home.

Original poster
MamaG · 26/01/2009 14:36

lolol at njb!

OP posts:
crumpet · 26/01/2009 14:38

erm, you could try gf - I used it as a guide to sleep routines, and the feed times sort of follwoed iyswim.

I never expressed, or did the "have toast and be dressed by 7 am" stuff, but the sleep guides were really useful for both of mine - and tbh they were contented!

Original poster
MamaG · 26/01/2009 14:41

ooh you're brave crumpet! What is the recommendation for sleep?

OP posts:
NormaJeanBaker · 26/01/2009 14:41

Ha ha - It was the reference to toast that put me off Gina F. I just couldn't face reading a book that included a toast schedule. But has worked well for friends.

ChairmumMiaow · 26/01/2009 14:42

How old is babyG now?

If you want to get into a gentle routine (not that I ever did this so I don't know if it would work) how about having quiet feed/snuggle time at around the same time each day to get one nap, and do whatever you can to feed him back to sleep for, say, 1 hour. This is a combination of bits from some of the (many!) different sleep books I've read. Pick one of the times when he's generally has a cat nap and stick to it for a week. If he's sleepy, at worst you'll have an hour of snuggly time . If it works, hopefully his nap will extend (that's the theory) and you'll have at least one period a day to get something done. We're moving to one nap a day with 1yo DS atm (when he's not ill) and it seems to be working ok so far.

ChairmumMiaow · 26/01/2009 14:44

I mean not that I ever did it when he was little - obviously its what we're trying now!

crumpet · 26/01/2009 14:49

oh dear, I can't really remember (last time was 2 years ago). Basically I think that they went down at about 9.45 for under an hour, then again at about 12.30 for 2 hours and again at about 4 or 4.30 for a short nap. The times do change as they get older, but mine never did exactly what the guru said - eg often only an hour and a half at lunch instead of the 2 hrs - but neither of them had to be "pushed" into it, those times really did seem to suit them (and they weren't sleeping at those times before I started), and it did fall into place.

Of course we'll never know whether they would have done the same if I hadn't follwed the guidelines, but I do thank gf for the hints.

FiveGoMadInDorset · 26/01/2009 15:04

Hi MamaG

I had the same problem with DS (now 7 months)he was a catnapper and has only now started doing 2 proper naps a day, it did take a while but he is now in a feeding routine, but still feeds to sleep. So he now has a feed at 6ish then usually stays awake and has s econd feed at 9ish where I feed him upstairs and he usually sleeps, then wakes up a bit of lunch then about 2 he will feed to sleep again then wakes bath and bed at 7.

crumpet · 26/01/2009 15:22

eerily similar to gf!

Pannacotta · 26/01/2009 15:25

I would just chill if I were you MamaG, they do get into a routine of sorts on their own from about 4-6 months but he is much younger I think?

fymandwhenisthisbabycoming · 26/01/2009 15:29

crumpet - I'm with you - shall we start a gf club?

I would recommend her routine [ducks to avoid flames]

minirollins · 26/01/2009 15:46

Hi MamaG,

I find myself in a similar predicament and appear to have a MIL who went to the same school of parenting!!! DD is 4.5months old and over the past month seems to have got into the habit of only nursing to sleep. Not sure if this has something to do with her teething and wanting comfort. Anyhow, I had a look about and came across this book: The No-Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep Through the Night by Elizabeth Pantley. I know, it might sound a bit tree-huggerish and softly, softly but it seems (FINGERS CROSSED) to be working...

Now it's still early stages for us but Pantley talks through a method which we call the Big PPO - the big Pantley Pull Off. Basically involves taking baby off the breast when they're drowsy and before they truly nod off. This way they lose the association they have of nursing with sleep, which can help them sleep for longer when they get to end of their naturally shorter sleep cycle. Now DD even can be popped into a sling and rocked to sleep without constantly scavenging for milk in the surrounding area!

I've also found that as DD is becoming less reliant on nursing to sleep, she can just about push herself through to nap for a bit longer - e.g. lunchtime nap seems to now go for a miraculous two hours, rather than the previous 45mins. I don't think you're being unrealistic (although this is my first time as a mum!) - I was starting to lose the plot with DD only napping for 20 mins at random times of the day! Might be worth a try...!

Original poster
MamaG · 27/01/2009 15:00

Thanks all - he'll be 12 weeks tomorrow so think its best I just go with the flow for a bit longer

OP posts:
FairLadyRantALot · 27/01/2009 15:11

Not read the thread...but getting the drift, I think..
anyway...what you could do to gently enrouge a rythm is to get up at the same time every day....I find that sort of gets things started...

sunshine75 · 27/01/2009 16:03

Routine saved my life and ensured I continued with bf. From 9 weeks I bf at 7.10,1,4,7 and then whenever dd woke through the night. I did this until solids were established at about 6.5 months. She then went to 7,11,3,7 and through the night. She then dropped the night feeds at 7 months and totally refused the mid morning at 7.5 months.

There were times when she had an extra one if she was hungry/tired etc but by and large she stuck to this routine.

So at 9 months she now has 3 bf a day. I'm delighted to still be doing it and the routine def helped.

Give it a go and see how it works

sunshine75 · 27/01/2009 16:05

Oh her beddtime routine is also good - bath at 6.30 and bed by 7 but the daytime naps are all over the place!!! Guess you can't have everything!!

pebblecat · 27/01/2009 16:20

Haven't read GF but there's a book called Baby Secrets (I think) by Jo Tantum (I think) which has been highly recommended (& no references to toast). It presents a variety of different routines whether you be bottle or breastfeeding. Maybe worth a look.

SweetEm · 27/01/2009 16:32

MamaG - my tip is that if you are trying to do any type of routine, expect it to take a while to establish.

Maria2007 · 27/01/2009 19:06

MamaG, hi! First, I agree with sunshine, once we started having a routine with DS (at 4 & a half months) things really really fell into place with his feeding & sleeping. And I'm convinced I'm actually going on with breastfeeding (like sunshine says) because of the GF routine, and not despite of it (as other mumsnetters would argue). I was finding feeding on demand completely exhausting, and frankly, my milk supply was not the greatest. With structuring feeds & with expressing at particular times, I managed to increase my milk supply & also we now have a predictable (but not rigid) pattern to our day, which feels very very reassuring. And I'm sure it's also good for my boy, because he seemed to naturally fall into it, & we never felt we pushed him into anything.

By the way, I really don't see what the problem is with routines... people here on MN seem to hate them! E.g. pannacotta saying you should just 'chill and go with the flow'. Well that's what I did for 4 & a half months, and there was nothing chilled about all that exhaustion! I tell you, my life is far far far more chilled since we organized our day. And you can do this gently, you don't have to push your boy, you just do it bit by bit...

let me know if you need more tips / ideas about how to get started...

Maria2007 · 27/01/2009 19:07

Oh and by the way, I really don't agree that all babies 'fall into their own pattern / routine' after a certain age. We've all heard of babies who feed on & off all day long until 1 or even 2 years old. There's no harm in organizing things a bit & gently pushing the baby in the right direction (and the less tiring for the parent direction )

sunshine75 · 27/01/2009 19:28

Well said, Maria. I sooooo agree. I don't believe in regimented routine and sometimes dd would feed at half three and not four but routine def saved my sanity.