Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

Extended bf - started night weaning last night, feel dreadful, buck me up?

86 replies

phdlife · 07/09/2008 21:50

Ds is 17m and while I can live with the good nights where he only wants one feed, two is more usual, 3 not uncommon, and when he's teething he just sees me as a giant dummy - and old enough now to start being very cranky indeed if I attempt to stop him chewing/pulling/sucking all frelling night.
With the result that, last week, I ended up with inflamed, permanently tender nips, and resolved to have a go night weaning. (AIBU?)

So we read the Jay Gordon thing and resolved to cuddle ds but not feed him, to start with, between 4 and 6 am. (He usually feeds sometime between 6 and waking at 7.)

Well, he sobbed his little heart out. Utterly devastated. For half an hour solid, then at intervals until it was getting light and finally, feeling like the Worst Mother in the Universe, I let him have a 2-minute suck and he fell straight back to sleep. He then slept - without any more feeds - til 8:45.

So now I feel terrible because I gave in which I guess probably confused him, I'm going to have to do it again (and again and again), and after one night I'm so tired I'm starting to think that hell, 3 feeds a night isn't so bad!

How long before he might get the message? Will he regress soon as the next two molars start hurting? How do you know if you're doing the right thing?

OP posts:

TheNinkynork · 11/09/2008 21:59

phdlife @ large button

I love MN...

alittleteapot · 11/09/2008 22:51

I jam my arm down across breast not in use but she's so strong trying to get under! I'll be joining the large nobbly button club.

think i may have spoken too soon. This evening went up the spout. She went to sleep at 7.30, woke at 8, fed back to sleep, woke at 8.15, got up, bed again at 10.15, woke up 10.30... yawn! I think I'm just too tired to have worked a bit harder at keeping her in bed, esp as friend was visiting from out of town...

Also, downstairs neighbour back from holiday so will be self conscious about any night time noise.

again.

Night all.

alittleteapot · 12/09/2008 09:07

Wow. DD slept from 10.30pm till 5.20am. Woke for 2 min feed and quickly back off to sleep. Woke at 7.05, fed and slept till 8.

It's all a bit unsettled in terms of a rhythm as she had a couple of super long afternoon naps to make up for long periods awake the first couple of nights. That might explain the evening. Also, she's got a cold brewing which is likely to affect things

We'll see. But I have to say, having ummed and ahhed about some kind of sleep training for months and months, I'm really pleased with how little I've found this process traumatic or upsetting. I'm really glad she's still in our bed at this point, though the goal once she's night weaned will to eventually move her into her room. That makes me feel a bit sad, but she's a big girl now!

sfxmum · 12/09/2008 09:14

hi you do have my sympathy I hated night weaning and did it a bit too late, and later than you, dd was over 2
I followed the NCSS and she got the message within a couple of nights
dd had pretty much self weaned during day hrs but sort of used the boob to go back to sleep if she woke up

next time I will do it earlier I think
good luck and hope for a better night's sleep

HaventSleptForAYear · 12/09/2008 09:34

Last night DS woke at 2am and I was so knackered I nearly fed him.

Plus he was roaring the place down and vvv cross.

BUT I held onto him firmly and rocked him and shushed him and after maybe 5 minutes he did a couple of burps (refluxer still has a sore tummy) and then leaned backwards to show me I could put him in his bed.

He then took his dummy (which he'd been throwing at me! ) and his teddies and lay down.

I sat beside him rubbing his tummy for a bit and then said night night and went.

He did then come in at 5am but I fed him and then he trotted off to bed til 7.30.

Am SO relieved that we didn't get another 30min tantrum.

alittleteapot · 12/09/2008 09:37

The next challenge of course is going to be to teach ME to sleep through the night. I'm sleeping SO badly, even when dd's doing well...

alittleteapot · 12/09/2008 09:39

Hey Haven'tSlept - good for your DS - what a big brave boy!

HaventSleptForAYear · 12/09/2008 09:39

Ahh - I had this with DS1.

After the early reflux days with DS2 I usually grab my sleep when I can and am the master of afternoon naps!

Original poster

phdlife · 12/09/2008 12:43

oh you're all making me so

lost count after the 4th time ds woke last night. stupid damn pre-molars....

OP posts:

Original poster

phdlife · 12/09/2008 20:42

I have resorted to putting bongela on my nips

OP posts:

alittleteapot · 12/09/2008 22:31

sorry you're having a hard time phd. really hope things improve soon. is he doing the all night sucking thing? that's how dd got through her molar action...

I'm SO tired. What am I doing on MN when I could be in bed? Gonna go now...

alittleteapot · 13/09/2008 11:12

blimey, I think dd slept from 11 till 7 last night. there might have been a stir at 5 but not much of one if so. went to bed at 7.30. woke at 8 and again shortly after.

can't quite believe it. really not meaning to boast phd, have been in your shoes and know all too well how tough it is. hope this gives you some hope that things will change. just get those toothypegs through!

Original poster

phdlife · 14/09/2008 20:25

yes all night sucking, were your nips sore? mine are unbearable

really happy for you though, alittleteapot. Happier still if you can pull off the next step (ttc!)

OP posts:

alittleteapot · 15/09/2008 09:14

Dreadful night last night. dd woke at 1 and 3 and really badly wanted to suck and suck. She has a really bad cold so tha'ts part of it. Also, because she's near enough slept through after 11 for a couple of nights, I think she'd forgotten the new rules. And I had relaxed and didn't quite have the energy to enforce them very well.

I'm going to get hardcore again tonight, and also consider applying same rules before 11pm so it's consistent all night.

Having seen how well she responded I do think we'll all benefit from the results and in general I feel a lot more pro sleep training than I did!

alittleteapot · 17/09/2008 16:38

I'll stop posting soon I promise. I'm sure you're all bored of our ups and downs but also for me this is quite a useful record, so forgive me wittering on...

Last night dd's sleep was pretty bad (awake every two hours in fact) BUT each time, including at the beginning of the night, I sshed her to sleep after feeding. So she fell asleep without motion or boob for the first time in her life!

Am going to do the full night wean soon, maybe at the weekend. Fingers crossed...

DownyEmerald · 22/09/2008 14:47

Been on holiday so I missed last week, but watching with interest ALT. My dd is 2.5 and on a good night wakes about three times for a feed. I don't mind really - it's so much better than the hourly feed she did between about months and 1yr - but dp does.

But yes then, if manage the night weaning it is her own bed, her own room, etc

alittleteapot · 23/09/2008 22:34

Hi Downy. Well she's still falling asleep really well but has been waking alot but has a bad cold. when she's better i'm going to try the full night weaning malarkey. will let you know!...

alittleteapot · 27/09/2008 21:24

just updating. Sleep training a bit on hold as MIL v ill plus dd still suffering with bad cough and cold. so nights have actually been pretty bad the last week and i've let her suck all night a couple of times figuring it was better for her cold to just go with it. apart from those nights the sshing back to sleep is still working a treat. Small steps... oh, and AF came back at last, which is great, so I'm not feeling quite so panicky, though if we do succeed in ttc then i will REALLy need some more sleep. cross that bridge...

Original poster

phdlife · 27/09/2008 21:28

hey alittleteapot, congratulations on AF (the things you find yourself saying on MN, eh? )

here's how it's going for us. not great, morale here is v low. hearing your success if actually quite encouraging.

OP posts:

usernamechanged345 · 27/09/2008 21:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

phdlife · 27/09/2008 21:44

yay MrsPickles, a model story to cheer us all!

I think ds will cope ok too - in fact we've had one all-night and a couple one-feed nights - just don't want to upset him when he's already low iykwim. soon as this cold is gone, though...

OP posts:

alittleteapot · 27/09/2008 22:43

hi phdlife have put a note on your new thread - good luck - keep chin up - gather some energy and go for it. part of it is it takes all your focus when you do it, or did me anyway, another reason why we've not got to part two yet - like you too much going on...

hi mrs pickles, that is a great story. will jsut get past this cold and follow your lead! based on dd's responses so far i think it'll work. i also think if we don't do it soon she will still want to be feeding at night at 5, which i'm not up for!

Original poster

phdlife · 28/09/2008 21:25

HIJACK ALERT

hey alittleteapot I'm doing my 15 minutes!

(erm, that was you, wasn't it? )

OP posts:

alittleteapot · 30/09/2008 20:29

Hey well done! That's great and has inspired me as i have not even looked at that thread for ages. TOMORROW I will endeavour to do my 15 mins! (had to think what you were on about for a min - pelvic floor exercises? then i remembered, MUCH more interesting.)

Original poster

phdlife · 30/09/2008 20:32

lol PFE's. In fact if I lol too much I will pmsl, really need to remember to do them

working tonight too!

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 3 4