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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

I am a mess, and feel stupid posting yet again.

52 replies

turtle23 · 09/08/2008 21:18

I think I may be going completely mad. DS is 19 weeks and I hated BF for the first 12 or so as had thrush and tongue tie and and and...I decided for my own selfish reasons to put him onto bottles two weeks ago and it took over a week for him to accept it, though still BF at night. He is now teething and very distressed, and although he still takes the bottle has a lot of "boobie time" to feel better. I have realised that I was being a selfish witch and am now wanting to go back to BF. I know, how cruel is that to do to a little boy to mess about like this?! Is it too disruptive? Am I being horrible? The time and space has given me perspective and I don't ever want to deny him what's best ever again. I just want to scream when I think how stupid I've been. Do I go back?

OP posts:

fishie · 11/08/2008 20:22

i think it must or people wouldn't take it. oats also i believe are said to boost supply.
but, i think the best answer is....

keep feeding turtle

how much formula are you giving?

callmeovercautious · 11/08/2008 20:26

Hi turtle. I just wanted to pop in and cheer you on really

When I first had DD there was a poster who successfully restarted BFing from absolute zero. She had loads of help from here and the professionals. If she can do it you can. Look around November 06 - Dec 06 I think.

I second the babymoons and boobie first before bottle. Just remember to feed on demand again now rather than watch the clock. At his age he should build back up to quite long gaps fairly soon.

I still BF at nearly 2 years. I am so glad I still do. Everytime I think about stopping another tooth appeared or she caught a cld, recently it was Chicken Pox. And everytime I count my blessings that she can get comfort without me having to make her wait for a bottle. I really have respect for the patience of those that FF.

Original poster

turtle23 · 11/08/2008 20:36

Am still feeding feeding feeding. DS went down at 7 so am doing 2-hourly pump til I go to bed. He had a total of 7 oz formula today. He basically just fed and fed and fed for most of the day. He is a bit boob-obsessed and would probably have my nipple in his mouth all day and night if I let him. He's had plenty of wet nappies today so am quietly confident that even though I'm expressing next to nothing, he must be getting something. Am choosing to believe that chocolate is the wonder drug needed, and taking it very easy again tomorrow. Only hitch is HV has demanded to see me tomorrow morning, and can't decide whether to let her in and just smile sweetly or pretend I'm not in. If I hear her say how "ridiculous" I'm being I don't know if I will cry or throw her out the window....
Thank you for all the support. I need it.

OP posts:

FfreckleFface · 11/08/2008 21:02

Turtle, hide from the HV. If she is anything like mine then she'll be knocking the door like a lunatic! Hoorah for breastfeeding!(I used to be SpaceHopperHayls, btw - decided to change my name as am no longer quite so spacehopperish!)

callmeovercautious · 11/08/2008 21:14

Ah ha - A HV involved If he has been feeding feeding feeding then you have nothing to worry about. He sleeps well (in fact I am a bit about that) and lots of wet nappies. Unless he is very down the centiles from birth you should be fine.

Trick is to be confident and smiling, if you feel happy about your decision don't be afraid to share it with her. I never had a problem with a HV until I was wobbling about weaning, she could feel I was unsure and kind of pounced on it and started hounding me to wean early. Luckily I got some sleep and found my confidence again (with the help of MN). Next trip to the clinic I had no bother from her.

If she ever calls you riduculous then please complain. They are there to support not be condecending.

as for the chocolate - I find Green and Blacks dark with mint the best ever BFing tool. Also very good when the hormones hit you

I also had a thought about your tearfulness. If you cut back on the BFing you may be a bit premenstrual. I got my periods back at 6 weeks so I know it made everyting much worse, I never had PMT pre DD I make up for it now though

Original poster

turtle23 · 11/08/2008 21:24

I am one of the unlucky few who got period back at 6 weeks despite breastfeeding night and day. Teary due to hormonal up and down of BF, not BF, BF, not BF...

OP posts:

Original poster

turtle23 · 11/08/2008 21:26

Is it acceptable to let her in, weigh baby(is ok, weighed him at home he has regained lost weight and is still on 60th despite weight loss last week) and tell her that will be all and goodbye?

OP posts:

callmeovercautious · 11/08/2008 21:35

Sounds good to me!

littleducks · 12/08/2008 07:46

If you think it is getting to much, ask lots of questions, on a subject that is not bfing so you could talk about weaning, sleep. language development (is baby signing valuable or a load of tosh in her opinion etc)

VictorianSqualor · 12/08/2008 08:49

If you want to let her in then let her in. But you don't have to.

Has she said you're being ridiculous before? (Sorry, if I don't remember, sadly there are so many shit HV stories on here I get muddled).

Original poster

turtle23 · 12/08/2008 09:07

VS-yes, was the other HV but it was said to me last week. I think it was what tipped me over the edge, I was scared as he hadn't had a wet nappy in 15-16 hours and wasn't eating, was trying to get rational answer out of her about when I should be syringing the odd bit of fluid in and she told me to stop being ridiculous, he's just testing you, he'll eat when he's ready. She checked his mouth for thrush, but didn't listen when I said his canines were double their size and he was shaking in pain (as far as I could tell) sometimes. She said he'd be fine with calpol(durrr...tried that) and he'd buckle soon, teething wouldn't stop him eating if he was thirsty/hungry. At one point he was taking ibuprofen then calpol alternating and he was eating ok...proved to me he was in pain. I know my son, he wasn't just being awkward, he COULDN'T EAT. Oh dear, am getting all steamed up before she arrives and it wasn't her I saw. To be fair though, it was her that rang last week and she did say I needed to make my mind up to give him bottles as it was just mean to keep offering him breast. Told me to stop being soft. Oops, sorry long post!

OP posts:

Original poster

turtle23 · 12/08/2008 09:10

to clarify...today's HV is the one who rang. I dont really know why she's coming, I think she thinks that I am at risk of PND as my score was borderline at survey, but she's been back twice since then and has said she thinks I'm fine...

OP posts:

VictorianSqualor · 12/08/2008 09:29

Mean to be offering him breast?
You really haven't lucked in the draw of HV's have you?
Jeez.
If she starts on one tell her you appreciate her advice but are in contact with a BFC from LLL/ABM/NCT or somewhere. People that know nothing seem to miraculously STFU when they realise someone else does know soemthing.

callmeovercautious · 12/08/2008 09:35

Well I hope it goes well for you. How is DS feeding today?

Original poster

turtle23 · 12/08/2008 09:43

Hurah! The fountain is back! I am leaking all over the place. Who'd have thought that'd make me happy! HV due in 15 mins, will report back.

OP posts:

LaTrucha · 12/08/2008 09:59

Hooray!

Original poster

turtle23 · 12/08/2008 10:38

The HV lives to ruin someone else's day. Only comment i got was "you know you will have to put your foot down someday" in regards to BF. sigh. she then admitted she bf her dd til 2...wtf?!

OP posts:

VictorianSqualor · 12/08/2008 10:40

LMFAO!!!

Maybe, though, in all seriousness, she found it hard to wean her LO and has issues attached to it?

thumbwitch · 12/08/2008 10:49

sounds like you're doing fine now turtle! A friend of mine always swore by drinkning loads of fennel tea to keep her supply up as she was a bit light on supply and her kids were voracious feeders - I have a cup of it every day and DS seems well-fed and is still on his growth line (slightly above it in fact).
Enjoy your boobie time with you DS - mine is 8mo and we still have plenty of boobie time in the day, as well as 2 solid-food meals. He's happy, I'm happy - it's great!

(Did you get the tonguetie snipped btw? We had DS's done early and it made a huge difference...)

noolia · 12/08/2008 11:14

yay! well done turtle! your hv sounds odd, what a funny comment -but not too nasty, just silly!

I have been piggyp and lookingforwardtosummer btw - last name not v appropriate with the awful weather!

StarlightMcKenzie · 12/08/2008 11:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

onwardandupward · 12/08/2008 11:35

What ridiculous HVs you have!!!!! They made me LOL too. Yes, Turtle, you are really going to have to put your foot down about all this ridiculous breastfeeding you know

You do know, don't you, that you are not obliged to have anything whatsoever to do with HVs? They provide a service. You are perfectly within your rights to say "ah, he's feeding well now, and I'm happy about his weight gain, so I'll be in touch when I have any anxieties [= when hell freezes over]" if you can't be doing with them. There's better information and advice out there than your HVs sound like they can give you.

Original poster

turtle23 · 12/08/2008 12:44

oh yes...forgot to add that when she said she'd be happy to come and see me i said not to trouble herself, i know where clinic is should i need advice from a hv.
i know this is just step one of a lifetime of guilt. lol.

OP posts:

LaTrucha · 12/08/2008 16:17

i had a real 'i'm going to piss on your bonfir' HV once. hellish. apparently, i've got a worse one coming - a militsnt bottlefeeder.

shall we ignore them together, turtle?

callmeovercautious · 12/08/2008 16:23

Good news about the supply and well done with the HV. Hopefully you are rid of them now

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