How old was your lo when someone first made hilarious wisecracking remarks like "bitty"?

[ReverseThePolarity]

Because this Christmas I got no end of jokey comments from rellies about how long I am intending to bf ds for.

"I bet ds will be like that man off Little Britain, you know, 'bitty'".

"When do you think you'll stop feeding him? When he goes to Uni?"

"What do you think his first word will be? 'Bitty'?"

And so on. All made in a happy jovial jokey way and one or two wouldn't have been so bad but by the end of the Christmas holidays I was getting really effed off with it.

These are the same rellies who when I was struggling with bf told me I was being stubborn and should ff instead. Of course now I've continued they're apparently immensely proud etc. etc. but I wonder... are they really? If so why all the jokey comments?

And ds is not even nine months old yet!!

So I wondered, how old were you when you got your first "bitty"-esque jokey comment?

[sushistar]

Ha, weddings and funerals are something to aspire to I think LL! I took LO to church on Christmas day and was faintly disappointed that he DIDN'T ask for milk during the service - I had sort of steeled myself to be prepared to bf in church as a sort of test of commitment to the whole thing!!

[crimplene]

I got two 'bitty' comments over Christmas - possibly 'cos it was on telly - DS is 19 mo

[Spink]

I'm anticipating a bitty comment from a nasty woman at work very soon - she's been working up to it, sneering at my breast pump..
and good one-liner, make-her-ears-bleed type responses from anyone??

[Spink]

ds is 10 months by the way

[chibi]

you could say 'how sad for you that no one seems to want or need your breasts...does it depress you that they are so superfluous?'

[Spink]

chibi
ugh, though, she'd probably make some lewd comment about her sex life, and then I'd be sorry...

[glaskham]

my 2 fed till 12 mths and neer had a single comment like that....though i think i was so high on my breastfeeding pedestal...i was the only one on my mothers and fathers side to ever breastfeed in public, some had but never did it round family's house and used formula when out....but my aunty had a baby 3mths after i had my ds and in the 3mths before she had her lo i talked her into trying bf and she did it, and she's still feeding him now at nearly 3....and she's feeding her 15mth old too!! she's fab, and not afraid to feed at family's houses either after seeing me do it and get no responce!!

if anything i was bowed down to by my great grandma who when i asked if she'd rather me feed in the back living room told me to get my breasts out and just feed my baby!!!haha.....and she was 87 at the time!!

[crokky]

I fed my 9 month old at a wedding and a male friend started on about bitty and could he have some as well!

[Jacanne]

Good grief - I was pretty horrified when my BF made a "bitty" remark when dd1 was 2.5 years - 9 months is ridiculously early for people to start making idiotic remarks.

[Jackstini]

Hi LL glad you are still feeding too.
Spink - just look down your nose at her and say "I'm sorry - I wasn't aware you were qualified to negate the WHO guidelines - must have slipped my notice you qualifying as a doctor/midwife/nutritionist...."
Glaskham - v impressed with your Aunty!

[Spink]

ooh, Jackstini, I will be practising that in front of the mirror tonight.
I realise I may come across as a bit sad, now.

[Jackstini]

Not at all Spink.
I remember praticising scathing put downs when I first had dd, ready for anyone approaching me for bfing in public - was gutted when it never happened!

[MumtoBen]

No one has ever commented on my bf - until the last week when strangely 3 comments have been made to me. DS2 is 6.5 months old.

My Nan - "What milk is he having now?" Me "Breast Milk". Nan - "What, you are STILL breastfeeding him?"

GP (DS2 had virus) - "I presume you are bottle feeding - how much milk is he having". Me "No actually he is bf". GP - visible look of shock.

Friend - "You are not STILL bf are you?". Me "Yes I STILL am". Friend launches into bitty comments.

Is this something that happens when babies are fed pas 6 months??? Don't know as unfortunately only fed DS1 to 6 months due to my illness.

[IorekByrnison]

I had a lot of this kind of crap over Christmas - "but she's got teeth and she can talk...", "are we going to see you on one of those Channel 4 programmes feeding your seven year old..." etc etc. But at 6.5 months? That is shocking. It's bizarre. You get made to feel like a bad mother if you don't breastfeed up to six months, but if you carry on a moment longer suddenly you're a freak.

IME it's after 1 year that most people seem to get twitchy about it, and after 2 years you get the open disapproval and ridicule.

[MumtoBen]

I can understand my Nan saying that as she's not really up with the latest info about bf, but didn't expect this from my friend. She didn't mean anything and was just joking. I don't know anyone who has bf beyond 6 months although almost everyone bf until 6 months, but not a day longer.

[ReverseThePolarity]

Yes, it's weird isn't it? If you don't bf, or do it for a few weeks some people look down on you (no one on here - I would hope - but you only have to read the comments on any Daily Mail story about breastfeeding struggles to see what I mean).

If you do it for longer than six months some people look down on you; at the very least it's expected that you will be "down to two or three feeds a day" and baby will be making up for those calories with "three solid meals a day".

If you do it longer than a year then you're clearly "just doing it for yourself" of course. (Which really annoys me, because not only is it not true, but even if it was so what? What would really be so bad about that even if it was the case?)

Oh and if you do it for years rather than months then "bitty! bitty! Extraordinary Breastfeeding Documentary! bitty! bitty!"

[geordiemacminx]

When I first read your post I thought you were going to say your ds was 2 or 3 or something, cant believe people would make these comments, especially since your ds is only 8 months. Is there a particular relative that you could confide in, who would perhaps speak to the others?

Although, having read your profile, as a scouser you are probabaly used to people taking the mick, married to a manc and all that. (Despite my name, we are all red in this house)

Joking aside, hope it doesnt spoil your experience of feeding your ds, you are giving him the best possible start.

[ReverseThePolarity]

Yes used to people taking the mick!

[beansprout]

Ds was actually a week old when I first got this, mind you, this was from the same tactless SIL who asked if he was an accident (no, he was not) and who, when I was still feeding him at 8 months said that I would never get him off me.

She was right - he is 3.2 and I am still feeding him now! Although, funnily enough, I don't see so much of her....

[ReverseThePolarity]

Asked if he was an accident!?

[Roseylea]

I bf dd until she was just over 1 and m,y parents made loads of those comments. I think they saw me as being weak-willed and unable to stop and dd as dominating me, whereas in reality I was happy to be bfing and planned to stop by about 18 months anyway. (I had to stop at just over 12 months as it was, because of meds I had to go on).

My parents are very routine-led when it comes to babycare, and it completely bewildered them that I demand-fed until 6 months, didn't introduce solids until about a month after that, and didn't reallly try to establish a feeding routine until the same sort of time. When dd was tiny they kept saying "But when is she due her next feed?" and I kept shrugging my shoulders and saying "When she's hungry!" I did much the same with ds, but they let me get on with it more that time round!

[ReverseThePolarity]

It used to freak me out a bit when I'd go to Mums & Tots and Mums would be saying "he's not due his next feed yet" of a little crying baby. I don't know if the babies were bf or ff but I had thought when they're newborn they're fed on demand either way.

Have a nice comment to share though... my Dad wasn't included in the Christmas bitty comments and I met up with him yesterday for the first time in a while. He said that it was nice to see me bfing ds and that in his Gran's day they used to bf them until two or three, was I going to do that as it seemed silly to stop now it was going well!!

In fact you know I might start a thread on that as it counteracted the "bitty" comments quite nicely, and you don't often get threads about nice things people say.

[Jackstini]

Reverse - that's a lovely comment from your Dad, would make a change to have a thread with the positives...!
Have been very lucky in my family really, everyone very accepting. Also didn't used to get on with my step-mum that well but she bf'd both her dd & ds until around 2 so gave me lots of support with dd and my Dad has been fine too.

[verylittlecarrot]

Your dad rocks! Tell him we all think so!

I made a conscious (trying to be braver than I felt) decision to feed in front of my folks from the off (we can be quite reserved about stuff like nudity and the like though, in our family). My Dad is the type who would squirm and change channels on TV if someone's boobs were shown etc.

He was totally OK with it, and I've made a real point of praising my Mum & Dad for having completely cool attitudes to the whole bf thing especially their support for me feeding in public.

My Dad, I've since discovered, has bragged about his "cool Grandad" breastfeeding supporter status on his Christmas newsletter, so I think he's secretly quite pleased to have been given the halo.

[Islamum]

No comments at family gathering today but found myself suddenly with no one to talk to when started feeding her - all seemed too embarrased to look at me! Also why do people who ff their dc ask you how you are feeding then feel need to explain why they couldn't bf? I'm not judging