Breastfeeding after 12 months

[RedRobyn2021]

Just looking for some insight really from more experienced mothers

My daughter is almost 11 months and I have always fed her to sleep at night. In the day she might sleep in the car or in the carrier if I'm out with the dog (although these have both become more challenging as she's got older). We also co-sleep so that me and her dad can actually get some sleep.

I'm just really curious as a lot of women seem to stop after 12 months, how do you do this? But also, why did you stop?

I'm also interested to hear from women who chose to continue after 12 months? How did things change as your little one got older?

I'm still feeding and cosleeping with my 18 month old. I don't really feed when out now it's more of a home comfort thing. She helps herself at night so I don't get disturbed too much!

@MsChatterbox

Thanks for responding

Out of interest, how have your family been about you continuing breastfeeding?

I feel like there will be comments if we continue

I did both.

With my eldest I stopped at 13 months. I stopped because I was TTC and although my periods had returned at 6 weeks pp we'd had a hard time conceiving number 1.

At that point I was just feeding morning and night. I'd night weaned at 9 months using controlled crying and he was in his own room and cot. I just stopped cold turkey and didn't offer it any more. He didnt seem to notice to date tbh. We swapped his feeds for a sippy cup of soya milk at that point.

With my second (and last) I wanted to keep going until she decided to stop. By 12 months she was also down to morning and night and quite soon after 1 she dropped the bedtime milk in favour of a sippy cup like her brother.

She did the same for morning feeds at 17 months

I bf past 2 I won’t say to what age as I’ve experienced rude comments on here but she has now self weaned. I bf all my kids till just over 2. But my youngest for the longest, she just showed no interest in stopping.

I breastfed DD till about 21mths & DS till about 13mths. Both weaned naturally themselves.
Basically I found that as they got older & ate more solid food, they breastfed less & I instigated a don't offer, don't refuse policy; so I didn't offer a breastfeed at set times, but I also didn't refuse if they asked. Then gradually as I returned to work & they went into childcare the regular feeds during the day tailed off until it was just breakfast & early evening & then they tailed off too.
I'd stopped the bedtime breastfeed early on by combi-feeding, so they had a bottle of formula instead as otherwise I was stuck in a feed to sleep cycle & meant I never got a night off. Then we stopped the formula, moved to cows milk, & over a period of months watered the milk down till it was just water & then they lost interest in that too.

I fed my eldest until 2.5 years old. After I went back to work (when DD was 1) we dropped to just mornings when she woke up and bedtime. Hun about 18 months we were just doing bedtime. We kept that because lockdown happened, there was nowhere to go and no reason to stop. We kind of lost track of time. Then she decided she wanted ‘cow milk for bed in a big girl cup’ one day when she was 2.5 and that was it. Easy.

I'm still breastfeeding my 19 month old. She's a huge fan of the boob and has so far firmly rejected any idea of weaning her. She doesn't feed if we're just out and about, but will if we're at a family house and she's familiar with the surroundings.
My family don't and wouldn't comment. My in laws don't approve but aren't daft enough to say out loud.

I weaned my first child in the day by 13 months and at night by 15 months. He wasn't really bothered, only the bedtime feed met with any resistance and that was cured by DH putting him to bed for 5 days.

I fed DD to 23m. She's allergic to dairy and I wanted to delay using dairy replacement 'milk' as long as possible.

Sorry to sound like a knob but she was an advanced (nearly) 2 year old so I was able to talk to her about stopping breastfeeding for a couple of weeks before we did and she understood.

I explained to DD that no bf meant we'd have time for two bedtime stories instead of just one so that was appealing to her.

From 1y onwards I only fed 1st thing in the morning and at bedtime. I might feed before nap time if we were at home.

I had an easy time stopping BF. I reckon it would have been harder earlier as DD wouldn't have been forwarned so wouldn't have any understanding of why it was suddenly withdrawn.

@RedCandyApple

Thanks for sharing. Did you feed your little ones to sleep as well? At night time her dad has been a part of the bedtime routine since maybe 3 months but he's never actually got her to sleep it's always been me. And then she wakes in the night and feeds back to sleep, I really worry that if we stopped I'd be getting woken and not be able to get her back to sleep!

I bf until they self weaned, they bf quite regularly until 3-4yo and then sporadically and stopped 4-5. My family and others had no idea it went on so long. They’re big kids now and I don’t regret any of it. They’re not ‘weird’ or anything. (I would say that though wouldn’t I? And if I’m a weirdo who bfs her kids so long, my idea of weird’s probably, we’ll, weird. But you know what? No one else’s opinion matters. Whatever I did, whatever you do with feeding: you have the power. Someone will disapprove, whatever you choose! You literally cannot please everyone: stop trying. Do what you want.)

Yes I did but I was a single parent to my youngest so didn’t have a partner to help with nights etc, we co slept so that made it much much easier! She didn’t use to wake in the night past 2 luckily so didn’t need feeding back to sleep.

I changed jobs when DD was 11 months. New job didn't provide me with a room to express so my supply dried up. I was quite upset about it.

Definitely comments from my MIL! Just ignore her though not worth my breath. My dh asked when I was stopping and once he heard the research about benefits of conintuing he was happy! Tbh, I don't have the strength to say no to my daughter when she's asking for milk I'm wrapped round her finger... So I couldn't stop even if I wanted to 🤣

Bf dc1 until 20months. Dc1 self weaned due to pregnancy. DC2 was fed until 30months- again self weaned due to pregnancy. Dc3 is still feeding now at 26 months. We're down to just a night feed to sleep and then overnight I offer water as we still co-sleep. I have to admit I don't know how to stop as it's been pregnancy that has dried my supply up and then led to them stopping feeding themselves. I'd love a fourth but I don't think that's going to be a viable weaning strategy this time around. 😂 I'll stop when dc3 is ready, I think the way it's going it'll probably be within the next 6 months or so.

I've had lots of stupid comments- basically because for the last 7 years I've either been pregnant or feeding. There's only so much idiocy you can take before you snap though. I find a sharp "mind your own tits" shuts up the stupid.

Fed my first til 2yr 3months and still feeding my 3yr 3mo now occasionally. First weaned due to me being pregnant with second. Second still gets comfort but doesn’t often look for it now, maybe every few bedtimes or if she is feeling poorly or really upset. I night weaned about 8months.

With DD we stopped breastfeeding when she was 22 months mainly because I was pregnant and had massive nursing aversion (held strong until 20 weeks though). We nursed to sleep all that time and the night feed was the last we dropped.

DS is currently 11 months and neither of us seem to have any plans on stopping for now. He’ll be off to nursery when he’s 14 months and I imagine we’ll still feed to sleep for naps at home whilst he’ll sleep without at nursery much like his sister did

I stopped feeding in the night from approx 18mo, but still fed ds on demand and to sleep at night until he was nearly 4yo, coslept from day 2 and still do now. I did get some comments, but not many. I suspect because anyone commenting knew I wouldn't care less what they thought. Do what's rights for you.

I fed my first until 4 months and my second until she was 2 and a half. And even then I think she would have continued but I'd had more than enough. Mostly for so long because she had a dairy allergy and wouldn't drink alternative milks. There were lots of comments past the 12 months mark, and gradually I just stopped talking about it at all and I think people presumed it had stopped. Once they reached the age that they could have other drinks, food or snacks it was only something that happened at home anyway as a rule. Some of the comments when they were made were bizarre, that I was only doing it for myself for example - I've never got the thinking behind that one. Or that it was disgusting. But people have opinions on everything you do with or for your children and some aren't afraid to voice them 😂 so this time round I just ignored them and carried on doing what worked for our family. Weaning wasn't too bad, I'd talked about it for weeks and put limits in place, so in the end it was fairly easy.

I kept going. But DD dropped to feeds first things in the morning and last thing at night by herself without any effort from me. She kept that up until a few months after she turned 2, with the length of feeds decreasing and occasional feeds being missed if she just didn’t ask for it. She stopped a few months ago, shortly after I got pregnant with DC2 - don’t know if my milk changed or reduced, but she just stopped by herself without any fuss.

I fed my first til about 14 months. I stopped because my work hours meant it was difficult to always be back in time for bedtime, and also because my period hadn’t come back and wanted to ttc again. It was easy to stop - id stopped day feeds when I returned to work at 11 months, so it was just morning and bedtime and through the night. Went cold turkey on the night feeds by moving him into his room abd sending DH in with water - only took a couple of days. I kept bedtime and morning for maybe a month more and just swapped a sippy cup of cows milk, again with DH giving them.

DC2 is 14 months and loves bf more than DC1 did, totally rejects cows milk. I wfh most of the week and we have a nanny so I’ve been continuing to feed during the day. Her sleep is awful so going to try to night wean her soon but will keep up morning and bedtime feeds til Spring when fewer bugs around. Bf gives her so much comfort when she’s ill.

[quote RedRobyn2021]@RedCandyApple

Thanks for sharing. Did you feed your little ones to sleep as well? At night time her dad has been a part of the bedtime routine since maybe 3 months but he's never actually got her to sleep it's always been me. And then she wakes in the night and feeds back to sleep, I really worry that if we stopped I'd be getting woken and not be able to get her back to sleep![/quote]
I know you didn't ask me, but I fed to sleep until it stopped working which was 9 months for both.

When we night weaned we replaced a feed to patting, tummy rubs and shhhh sounds. It took 3-4 nights and never looked back. The kids a very attached loving children.

They still have a cup of soya milk at bedtime at almost 5 and 3 and won't stop that until they say they don't want it any more.

I have to say, I'm sad my daughter stopped feeding at 17 months. I'd be up for going much longer

I fed DS until 15 months. That was the point he started to lose interest and faff about a lot during feeds (we were only have two or three in 24 hours by then). It was taking ages and getting on my nerves and he obviously wasn't getting anything out of it any more, it had just become a habit. We went cold turkey and he was over it by the second day.

I’m also still bf our 2 year old.
We co-sleep for most of the night (she starts off in her own bed) It works for all of us and we have always slept well.
I bf her to sleep but it’s more comfort rather then actual having milk now. Since dd turned 2 a few months ago, she bf less often but tends to use my boobs just for comfort and usually for just a few mins here and there. She’s always been a boob monster!
I’ve never had a reason not to continue and have been fortunate to have found bf easy. It’s been a good time for both of us.
I’m 3 months pregnant with dc no.2 so we will see how these next few months go!

I fed DC1 until 2.5 (think my milk dried up in pregnancy). I am 'still' feeding DC2 at 2 yrs. no plan to stop. I work full time as a solicitor.

I like the convenience of feeding plus the nutritional and psychological benefits. It helps with teething, illness, getting to sleep quicker, soothing, protection, food/drink plus much more.

Do what feels right for you. I still heavily rely on breastfeeding as a tool

DS2 fed until he was 3 years 3 months and I had to wean him as it was hurting & I had no milk (pregnant). It was mostly great, we have a lovely bond. He still says he wishes he could be a baby for his Milkies & really looks back with fondness. I have no regrets on continuing & I also half wish I didn’t need to wean but I felt I couldn’t continue.
DS3 is currently 9 months & feeding, again no plans to stop. I may let him self wean this time but I’m just going to go with the flow.

Family definitely thought it was weird, I just didn’t mention it. DS2 was a bit obsessed with putting his hands in my top too which didn’t help but it was his comfort (weirdly as soon as I had DS3 that stopped immediately).

I work full time after mat leave too, not a SAHM. Do what works for you & your child, don’t listen to anyone else as it really doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks!