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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

7 DAY OLD BABY FEEDING TOO LONG?

26 replies

ladypanda · 04/12/2007 13:01

My new ds is taking up to 45 mins a breast to feed and i am knackered... feels like no break in between feeding and starting again. should i take him off the breast after say 30 minutes or not? help... not quite sure what to do

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 04/12/2007 13:02

This sounds completely normal to me. The first 6 weeks or so with dd were like this. 45 mins actually sounds quite reasonable.

That's not what you wanted to hear is it?

belgo · 04/12/2007 13:04

congratulations on the birth of your ds! You must be knackered.

Feeding for that long sounds normal - make sure you are sitting or lying as comfortably as possible, food and drinks to hand, the remote control/good book nearby and try and relax while you are bfing.

marge2 · 04/12/2007 13:08

Sounds familiar. However I soon realised that my son wasn't feeding for all the time he was at the breast - he was feeding for a few minutes and then just dropping off to sleep and gently mouthing in his sleep - to my inexperienced eye it looked to all the world like he was still drinking.

PErhaps your baby is doing this?

tiktok · 04/12/2007 13:37

ladypanda, this is normal for a new baby, and it's not even especially faster with bottled formula.

Check he is transferring milk - by now, his poos should be frequent and yellow, and he should be showing by his behavious he gets a nice full tum.

What were you expecting, by the way?!

It's only tiring if you are trying to rush round doing other stuff between feeds ....there's nothing tiring about sitting on the sofa watching a DVD

witchandchips · 04/12/2007 13:42

normal but will get better. Have you got a feeding cushion so that you can read, talk on the phone and eat biscutis while you feed.

HonoriaGlossop · 04/12/2007 13:51

But I think some people do find breastfeeding in itself, exhausting...it doesn't have to be that the OP is rushing around between feeds (doesn't sound like there's any time between anyway!)I think it's OK for the OP to feel exhausted by it even if she is just 'sitting on the sofa watching a DVD', it's not really helpful to be told you SHOULDN'T be tired when you are absolutely exhausted!

I'm sure this is very normal and common, but it's still bloody hard going isn't it ladypanda, I salute you for doing it - I have seen on here numerous times to just take it day by day...don't think "Breastfeeing will always mean 45 min feeds all day and all night" - just accept that's it for TODAY, but things change all the time with babies!

tiktok · 04/12/2007 14:00

Honoria, having a new baby is tiring. Not getting the amount of sleep you are used to is tiring. Feeling pressured to do other stuff 'while the baby sleeps' is tiring. Trying to settle an unsettled baby is tiring. Worrying whether the baby is doing the 'right thing' is tiring. Being stressed and anxious is tiring. Difficulties with breastfeeding are tiring.

Breastfeeding in itself is not tiring. You might as well say breathing or walking or speaking or sitting down watching a DVD is tiring. It's the attendant stuff around breastfeeding that's tiring.

Stefka · 04/12/2007 14:06

My LO fed for that long in the beginning and it really tired me out. It didn't last forever although he still has a long feed at night. He soon settled to shorter feeds.

FioFio · 04/12/2007 14:08

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HonoriaGlossop · 04/12/2007 14:37

thanks for the clarification tiktok. I agree that all that is tiring, but I do feel that it wasn't supportive to the OP be asked "what were you expecting?!" or told that there's nothing tiring about sitting on the sofa, when she clearly feels that she IS exhausted by the demands of bfing and is only seven days in to it all!

FioFio · 04/12/2007 14:39

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tiktok · 04/12/2007 15:08

Honroria, I think I may have come across rather differently than I meant...when I said 'what were you expecting!?' I didn't mean it as a sort of exasperated question to the OP...my exasperation is with books and other forms of information that lead mothers to be surprised at normal newborn behaviour (which this almost certainly is), and I can see this sounds wrong

I explained what I felt the tiring bit to be - ie the trying to do other things.

There is, after all, nothing tiring about breastfeeding per se and I don't see the point of pretending it is, just to sound supportive. I am aware it can feel that way, though!

claraenglish · 04/12/2007 18:31

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MaeWestYeMerryGentlemen · 04/12/2007 18:38

I would agree that looking after a tiny baby is tiring, rather than breastfeeding... BUT, for me I found that bf did make me feel dozy (handy for night feeds) in the early weeks - something to do with oxytocin/other hormones?

You're doing a fab job ladypanda - I remember being on the phone to my mum in tears in the early days because all I'd been doing was feeding, changing, feeding, feeding etc. She said 'well that's what they do' . It does get so much better, just keep on taking it one day, or one feed at a time

MrsMar · 04/12/2007 20:34

Ladypanda... 12 weeks ago I was in the exact same place as you are. My ds was taking 45 mins at least each side. Stupidly I read a book which said that new borns should feed for about 40 mins total, so I thought I was doing the wrong thing and leaving him on too long, so I started reducing his feed times to 40 mins every 4 hours. I very quickly found out this is far too little for a new born. My milk supply almost completely stopped. I did get it back but it was hard work.

I hate to say it but the moral of the story is let your baby feed as long as he wants. If he takes 2 hours let him. He'll get better at getting the milk out but it'll take a while. My feeds are still about 1 hour for a good feed, occasionally he has short ones of about half an hour, but I always allow an hour and he's 12 weeks old now. I guess some babies are just slow feeders, I know some people in my ante natal group have babies that feed in ten minutes flat.

This stage won't last forever, take advantage and get some movies you've always wanted to see or something similar. I caught up on loads of films during my first few weeks. Whatever you do, let him feed until he drops off. It's hard to tell sometimes with newborns cos they have a habit of falling asleep, but you'll get to know the signs that he's had a belly full!

On the subject of being knackered when bfing... I could be wrong, but I'm fairly sure that the act of bfing causes some kind of hormonal response that makes you feel a bit sleepy (oxytocin?). I always get a real urge to drop off when feeding, quite nice if you're doing a night feed and you're going back to bed, quite difficult if it's the middle of the day and you're already quite tired. But you're doing such a wonderful thing for your ds, well done and good luck!

tiktok · 04/12/2007 22:08

Yes, hormones in bf can make you feel relaxed and reduce stress. This is not the same as it being tiring

MrsMar · 05/12/2007 21:34

that's kind of what I meant tiktok... I feel so sleepy when I'm feeding, but you're right, that's different to being tiring. The implication of tiring is different. I do get such and urge to drop off though.... lovely if I'm lying in bed feeding, but so hard if it's the middle of the day and I've got stuff to do. Doesn't last too long though.

smallwhitecat · 05/12/2007 21:39

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FourPlusOne · 05/12/2007 21:55

I would agree that it can be tiring and make you feel sleepy - especially if you are stuck on sofa all evening constantly feeding. I used to ask my DH to watch me sometimes to make sure I didn't fall asleep and drop the baby. Feeding just made me rally dozy sometimes. 45 mins does sound perfectly normal though. Maybe you can do some feeds in the bed (even daytime ones) if you are comfortable with this - then you can have a little nap too. I wish that I had dome this with DC1 when I had the chance. Would have done anything to lie in bed feeding DC2 all day but of course that wasn't possible!

StarlightMcKenzie · 05/12/2007 22:10

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foxythesnowman · 05/12/2007 22:17

Enjoy it! Sit/lie around, feeding and nuturing. Get some good books/magazines/films so you don't get oo bored, and someone to bring you drinks and healthy snacks.

Honestly, your body is doing something new, and you are getting used to it. These early days are precious. You really should be doing nothing more than feeding him, and gazing at him IMHO .

In these early days that is all there is to do. Feed and gaze. Feed and gaze.

Congratulations and good luck!

Dalrymps · 06/12/2007 16:46

Had probs bf myself but apparently (my bf councillor says) as they get a bit older they can become more efficient in gettting the milk from you so may not feed for quite so long, at the moment the baby will take exactly what it needs and they are very clever at doing this, baby will also be stimulating you to build a good milk supply. you could always contacta local bf councillor to check this, if it carried on for ages it could be totally normal but also could meant the latch is not quite right so the baby is sucking and sucking for ages to get what it wants, i think though you'll find it settles down a bit, hang in there, i'm in the process if building my milk supply back up after temporarily stopping and lo fed for an hour and a half yesterday cause there's not much there so know how you feel!

ladypanda · 10/12/2007 20:10

gosh, thank you ladies for all your help. I like the notion of simply feed and gaze! My midwife gave me some tips, it seemed the way I was feeding was giving him more fore milk and not enough hind, and since I've altered my technique I've noticed more efficient feeding. Plus yellow poo (as opposed to green, apparently a cause for celebration in a newborn!)I'm generaly much more relaxed- first baby though, what a roller-coaster!

Bring on the christmas films

OP posts:
DanJARMouse · 10/12/2007 20:19

can i gate crash for just a moment and ask tiktok if 10-15 min feeds are ok? daniel is 11 days old and this is all he feeds for at a time, but it is at least every 2hrs during the day, cluster feeds in the evening and then 1 feed overnight.

im worried that i havent had this 5min feed malarky!!

DanJARMouse · 10/12/2007 20:20

45min feed malarky even!

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