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Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Infant feeding

Urgent help please

70 replies

mandler · 07/11/2007 17:56

All the helplines are busy and I need advice quick. Just had health visitor round who looked at screaming colicky baby (who has been on and off boob all day) and told me to top him up wth formula. She then goes off and speaks to her colleagues who look at his weight gain (he is three weeks and on 25th centile) and decide that I am not producing enough and definitely need to top up.
I am so upset, crying my eyes out as I have been made to feel like I am starving my baby. The same health visitors have watch me feed and checked his weight all along and have never had a problem. What the hell do I do? I feel so guilty as he lies here screaming that I have a bottle of formula here and ready to give him.
Help!!

OP posts:

Report

ruddynorah · 07/11/2007 19:31

it doesn't matter about trying to tell if he just wants to suckle for comfort or if he wants to feed. just put him to your breast. all you need to be thinking about is keeping him close to you and letting him feed/suckle/snuggle often. sometimes this can mean pretty much constantly. dd spent her first few weeks just feeding and dozing on me, no feed times, no nap times, just tons of snuggles.

kiskidee · 07/11/2007 19:33

it sounds like your baby might be going through a growth spurt which may explain the popping off and on all day without seeming satisfied. this is the way they build your milk supply (establish breast feeding at this age)

within 24 - 48 hrs your body responds with a higher supply and they calm back down. it may be tough going tonight. try to take him to bed and rest with him. it will help the two of you cope.

of course, please tell us about the wee and poo patterns. what goes in must come out so it tells us a lot about how much milk he is getting.

BabiesEverywhere · 07/11/2007 19:33

So what evidence has the HV put forward to show the you are not producing enough milk ?

ruddynorah · 07/11/2007 19:33

x-post.

how did he 'look' hungry? how is seeing this HV tomorrow going to help? i guess you're hoping a large weight gain will boost your confidence. i'm concerned for you that this HV will just come out with some useless 'advice' before sending you on your way even more confused.

ruddynorah · 07/11/2007 19:35

a lot of HVs don't understand the basics of breastfeeding. many will know shockingly little so suggest formula and bottles because they have better knowledge of this.

juuule · 07/11/2007 19:38

If you are also getting wet nappies off your baby, then there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with your milk or the feeding to me.
You say that his weight dropped to 7lb at the end of the first week. So that means that in a week and 2 days he has put on around 11oz. 11oz in 9 days. How much weight do they (hvs) want him to put on?
One of mine 6lb 14 at birth dropped to 6lb 9. At one point I stopped getting her weighed as she only put 1.5-2oz a week on and it got me down. However, she did produce lots of wet nappies, looked well and healthy and happy. She is now a healthy 11yo.
Your ds is only 3weeks old. Does he cry when he is feeding? I would let him suckle whenever he wants and whenever you get a chance. I offered mine a feed/suckle if I got a chance to sit down. I'd watch tv with them attached. Lovely feeling all relaxed, baby all curled up suckling away.
Just get curled up with him and give yourself a break.

mandler · 07/11/2007 19:41

OK 8+ wet nappies, at least 3-4 poos.
He was frantically trying to suck his hand ruddynorah, he is always really sucky it calmshim down.
We will get him weighed at hospital as he is bing put in casts each week for talipes to correct his feet. means he can only be weighed when getting his casts replaced. So I will have to tell hv his weight. She keeps phoning me tonight to see if I have given him formula yet!

OP posts:

juuule · 07/11/2007 19:42

And as someone else has said "you have done it". You and your body have kept your baby alive and well for the last 3weeks. And not only that he is 11oz heavier than he was, thanks to the obviously more than adequate supply of milk you are providing him with.

juuule · 07/11/2007 19:43

8+ nappies a day. He couldn't produce that many wet nappies if he didn't have enough going in.

mandler · 07/11/2007 19:45

Her issue seems to be the calorie content of my milk rather than the quantity...

OP posts:

juuule · 07/11/2007 19:45

Some babies are really sucky. It's not necessarilly a sign that they are hungry. They suck for comfort. Having said that, if it was one of my babies at 3weeks old, every time he went to suck I would offer the breast.

themildmanneredjanitor · 07/11/2007 19:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

barbamama · 07/11/2007 19:47

Havent read the whole thread but just to say my ds was 6th centile at that age and was fine - strapping 3 year old now. Take what the HV's say with a pinch of salt - it is whether the weight is going up that matters, not the absolute figure and it is dropping through lots of lines that indicates problems, not just being on a low one - you some times have to remind health visitors that it is called a normal distribution for a reason! It is early days, bf could get much better.

juuule · 07/11/2007 19:47

Don't worry about the calorie content. As far as I'm aware the calorie content of all women's milk is more or less the same regardless of diet. I'm sure someone on here could find the evidence for that. I'll have a look.

TigerFeet · 07/11/2007 19:48

God those graphs really get on my nerves... it seems that every HV is on a mission to get all babies up the graphs, however graphs show an AVERAGE so if your child is smaller than average all the way through and follows the growth curve for their weight then there is no problem.

My dd was a screamy colicky baby but no-one ever suggested I top up, because she was trotting along the 91st centile. Her weight gain was probably no greater than your ds's but because she was above the 50th I was left alone.

Sorry for garbling but this makes me Very Very Cross Indeed

Good luck mandler, you are doing the right thing by your baby. Keep up the good work

VictorianSqualor · 07/11/2007 19:49

Firstly I have to agree with BabiesEverywhere, I bookmarked this earlier after someone posted it, please look at the differences you have already made to your baby. NCTreasons

Secondly, I remember with DS when at a few eeks old, he fed continuosly for days, yes days, because he was going through a growth spurt. As long as you put him to the breast as often as he needs it, and get plenty of skin-to-skin contact you will make enough milk.

You are not starving your baby, so please do not let some daft health visitor tell you that you are. Many HV's unfortunately are not trained breastfeeding counsellors and after some of the hooro stories I have read on here I would be very cautious of taking any advice from a health professional that wasn't a fully trained BFC. They know very little, and the little they do know seems to be either mixed feeding or stopping altogether.

ruddynorah · 07/11/2007 19:49

you do not have to tell the HV anything. you never need to see her again. and if she rings again about formula ask her why she isn't giving you any bf support ffs.

StaryNightSky · 07/11/2007 19:49

Switch the phone off, stop answering it. Tell her to go away!

your doing a great job by the sound of it,

Just ignor her.

mandler · 07/11/2007 19:50

Who are the best counsellors then? not too impressed wit LLL call I made earlier

OP posts:

VictorianSqualor · 07/11/2007 19:51

Calorie content?? from what I know all mothers milk is pretty much the same, babies are like parasites! Just as when you were pregnant they would take everything they needed, as will they when they BF!

StaryNightSky · 07/11/2007 19:52

I think NTC are well recommended on here.

I think it might depend on your area, but give them a go.

Think another pster posted their number earlier

ruddynorah · 07/11/2007 19:52

try NCT. what did LLL suggest you do? did she reassure you that your nappy 'results' sound fine?

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littlefrog · 07/11/2007 19:52

calorie content of milk??
she's only guessing here, she can't POSSIBLY know that, and it sounds SO unlikely
it sounds like you are doing wonderfully, and as everyone says, topping up means you produce less not more. little babies love to suckle, so if you can, just let him suckle all he wants. Have you got a sling you can bf in? i found a kari-me just brilliant for that, and he LOVED it even when not feeding, really calm and happy.
congratulations on your ds!

VictorianSqualor · 07/11/2007 19:54

Breastfeeding Network 0870 900 8787

NCT supporter line 0870 444 8708

Association of BF Mothers 020 7813 1481 and 08444 122 949

Try them all, I dont know which is best, but one of them will ahve the best info at hand.

mmelody · 07/11/2007 19:57

Your HV has no idea what she is talking about. Turn off your phone and take some deep breaths. Try and relax and take GOOD advice from Mumsnet. Breastmilk is PERFECT for your baby.. offer more breastfeeds this evening rather than a top up of formula.. you are doing a FAB job... Its so hard in the beginning.. well done

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