Exclusive Pumping

[ANP88]

I wanted to open up the subject of exclusive pumping and hear from others on their experience. DS is now 5 months and after several difficult weeks at the start, I gave up breast feeding and now I am exclusively pumping. I've had to invest heavily in a variety of pumps, using the Elvie handsfree now as it gives me more freedom. Still, I feel like I'm done with it and want to stop, yet I feel selfish for not wanting to keep it up. I would love to hear thoughts, suggestions and experiences from other parents on this topic, as there appears to be very little literature about it.
Thanks

I have up breastfeeding my first at five months when I returned to work. Didn't feel guilty at all! And I never got the hang of pumping so if I couldn't have breastfed for whatever reason I wouldn't feel guilty about that either. Bravo for persevering as long as you have - I certainly would not have.
If you want to stop, stop.

Thanks Pipandmum. I had bad experiences pumping whilst at work previously, so I think its part of the reason I want to give up before I go back. Usual mum-guilt kicking in though, so thank you for lifting me up!

Goodness I’m impressed by the exclusive pumping. That sounds exhausting. Well done for done for keeping it up.

Hey @ANP88,

I've exclusively pumped with both my children - DD1 I did four months before I gave up due to tendinitis and DD2 I have literally just stopped pumping in the last ten days or so.

I get the guilt - I feel so guilty for not pumping. Everyone says how amazing it/you are to have done it for so long but that just makes me feel worse as I've now stopped and I am denying my child of the best nutritional choice.

I feel guilty over not pumping for as long with DD2 as I did DD1.

I really struggled with making the decision to stop pumping this time. First time round, I had to stop as I was in so much pain. This time I feel like I'm being selfish. Ultimately though, I made a decision which was best for my whole family. However, my DD2 is now having issues with FF (as in she won't feed) and I feel really guilty!

It's so difficult.

5 months is great - your child will have benefitted loads and (rationally) you've done a really good job!

Thanks cookiesaurus. It’s definitely challenging. I found the Elvie hands free was essential, but now ds is crawling, and I am running around a lot, I’ve started one formula bottle a day and I’m going to gradually decrease pumping to twice a day. I’m hoping now he’s about to start on solids, it will make me feel better about stopping, but I’m keen to get my life back!

In some ways, exclusive pumping has been amazingly freeing, but I’m not producing as much milk unless I’m permanently ‘plugged in’!

Thanks for opening up about your experience. I feel there is very little out there for us mums making this decision and even less support.

You should be amazingly proud to have pumped at all. Most people don’t even realise this is an option, and with two, it must be very difficult. Be proud!

Interesting subject. I can’t click on the link for some reason, but if you want to start somewhere, check out Elvie. They have just released a new product for let down called the ‘curve’ to rival the hakaa. From a design perspective, these are incredibly different to everything else on the market. They are a small company too, so if you have any design questions, it might be worth you reaching out to them.

What you have done is amazing. No one will know how hard it is unless they have done it. I did exactly the same as you. I probably spent eight hours a day pumping and sterilisation. At five months we went on a short break and I relaxed my regime. Supply dried up. I know the guilt but I don't feel it now. You have done enough. Enough is not the word. Above, beyond and brilliant mothering.

I hated pumping with a passion. All of the cons of both breast and bottlefeeding, 3 times the work, so time consuming it takes over your life. None of the convenience of breastfeeding either.

I am a passionate bf advocate but I would never recommend exclusive pumping unless the mother really wanted to. 5 months is incredible.

If you want to stop, stop and feel not one shred of guilt.

Thanks ladies!! Very grateful to hear your stories x

I’m 18wk pregnant with baby 2, and planning to exclusively pump with this one. There really isn’t much support at all for it!

I pumped from week 3-6 with my first after breastfeeding went pete tong and then some - I know how hard pumping is and you have done absolutely amazing to do 5 months, you don’t have a single thing to feel guilty about!

Thanks MrsG30 and congratulations!

Yep. I found there was so little support, especially from health visitors and midwives. It made me feel like I was failing my ds by not being able to breastfeed. But it is breastfeeding, right?!

How long did you pump last time? I found I needed 2 pumps for exclusive pumping, since they seem to break. I had a hand held, plus an Elvie, which has been amazing for hands free pumping. It means I’ve been able to keep going longer because I can get around and do feeds / changes whilst pumping. The Elvie is really expensive, but apparently you can get them free through nhs or via medical insurance, so maybe ask your GP. Not sure what the criteria is, but again, the fact that no one mentioned this to me as an option was frustrating. If I could, I would have bought the double set to make it that much easier.

Good luck!

I only did 3 weeks pumping with my first (I got mastitis which gave me sepsis and killed my supply, but kept feeding him as that was all the advice - only he wasn’t getting enough and was hospitalised on the verge of organ failure - it gave me ptsd that I listened to that advice when I knew in my gut he wasn’t getting what he needed, still feel awful 3 years on! Also hence my point blank refusal to even entertain direct nursing this time, not a hope in hells chance)

I only stopped pumping with DS as his god awful dietician told me the reason he was screaming every feed, arching his back, nasally and congested was due to the mix of breastmilk and formula and “sometimes that can happen”. So I stopped pumping as I wasn’t getting enough to sustain him (was building my supply back up).

Turned out he had cow milk protein allergy and was allergic to the formula 🙃😡

So this time the best of both worlds seems to be to pump so they have breastmilk and hopefully avoid an allergic reaction (me and DS are allergic to cow milk so this bub is likely to also), but feed via bottle so I know what they’re getting and they I’m producing enough 🤞

I’ve got the spectra s1 on order and a bellababy which I have read you can get the freemie cups to use with it - sadly the Elvie is out of my budget, although I’ll absolutely look into getting one through nhs, thank you for the tip!

(The mastitis was from direct nursing, he was a god awful latch despite no tongue tie, we could only get him to latch with nipple shields and then it was a fight and took forever!)

MrsG30 I am so sorry to hear how awful your experience was. Definitely you have to do what is right for you. Ds3 had an awful latch and I had my midwives were so unhelpful. I bled so much I was in tears. I saw 5 midwives and a lactation consultant, and none of the could figure it out. No tongue tie. I was in such pain, and when I said I’d had to give a bottle because he was hungry, they were so rude to me and made me feel like a bad mother. I am a huge advocate for breastfeeding, but not at the cost of a mother’s mental or physical health.

I am raging on your behalf! I can’t believe what you’ve been through and you’re still looking to pump. You are amazing! Please don’t feel guilty. Sending hugs x

(The Elvie is RIDICULOUSLY expensive. Only justified it as being the cost of buying formula for 3 months)

I’m so glad I found this thread! I’m 17 weeks pregnant (my first) and already feeling anxious about the thought of breast feeding. I was thinking whether it would be possible to exclusively pump from the beginning because of the difficulty in getting the baby to latch sometimes and also not knowing if the baby is taking enough milk. It just seems like a minefield. 😩

I agree with PP’s OP, you have done so well to do this for so long, you have nothing at all to feel guilty about.

I’m currently also exclusively pumping for an almost five month old!

We had the Elvie pumps to start with and ended up returning them, I found them absolutely dreadful! The leaked through every time I used them. I ended up having to hold them with a muslin to catch the milk it was leaking. After a number of new parts from Elvie they said there was nothing more they could do!

I have a spectra now, it is so much better and no leaking!

I EPed for my first child for 12 months. He never would latch properly and I ended up hospitalised with a breast abscess. Interestingly he is now under the care of a orthodontist for jaw issues.

It was fine. I always had a good milk supply though. When I started I thought it would be temporary so only bought a single pump. I highly recommend a double pump!

I was told by many people that my milk supply would dwindle rapidly without direct stimulation from my baby but that never happened.

Breastfed my next two without issues, but being an old hand at pumping it made it easy to pump bottles for them as needed.

Congrats FingersCrossedForAllOfUs!

Hopefully you will get some insight from all the posts. It’s a great option for anyone who won’t be nursing for whatever reason, yet it’s never discussed or promoted by health professionals. As an EPing newbie, I’ve learnt that’s it’s all about getting the right pump for you, so deffo check out the OP’s recommendations.

I haven’t had any issues with supply either. I do wish I’d frozen more milk when I had surplus though, instead I’ve just pumped to keep up with ds.

I'm so glad you started this post! I'm pregnant with my second. I hated breastfeeding. I found it completely overwhelming and gave up at 4 weeks as my mental well-being was at risk. I really think when I quit it was a choice between breastfeeding of post natal depression.
So like you, I pumped. I also received no support from anywhere. The la leche league for instance were completely uninterested in helping me as I wasn't actually breastfeeding.never mind how much time a day I spent milking myself! I lasted 4 months on about 50% of his feed which dwindled down to about 20%.

How did you get the milk going so well? I pumped 5 times a day and found it hard to get near the quantities needed. ?

I am so impressed with 5 months. Although pumping has the advantages of breast milk and flexibility of bottle it's bloody tough. You fall between the cracks of support groups and unlike bf it doesn't get easier overtime. Forget the guilt you deserve a medal.

I exclusively pumped for my twins - well actually I don’t know if I can even say that because DT2 needed a mix of EBM and specialist formula for medical reasons, and I never produced enough for both so had to supplement. But they weren’t able to latch without extreme pain for me after a long nicu stay and I felt like such a failure I kept pumping long past when i wish I had stopped. At the time it felt like the most important thing in the world and I look back now and realise it was PND and anxiety talking.

My supply crashed when DT2 was readmitted to hospital at two months old and I had to stay in with him 24/7 for a couple of weeks, and the Paeds HDU wasn’t very pumping friendly. Once we got home I went back to 12x a day until they were 7 months and I hated every second of it. Many of my pumping sessions were spent in tears, and I missed out on a lot of cuddles - I was basically feeding, pumping, washing up on an endless cycle.

I wish someone had just said to me that I should just stop and that it was okay. I had a GP tell me I was crazy to do it, which isn’t quite the same.

You’ve done an amazing job, you should feel really proud of it. It’s a huge commitment and the worst of both worlds of infant feeding. It’s okay to stop when you are ready to stop.

I did this for 5 weeks with my eldest and then had to stop as I literally had no time to do anything else and was starting to feel quite down. For me there was something dehumanising about it by that point. I felt like a one woman dairy farm!

You've done more than enough OP. 5 months is a really long time to pump!

OP I am so impressed with 5 months. You should congratulate yourself, give yourself s huge pat on the back and maybe get yourself a nice present
I pumped for 3 months with DS. He couldn’t latch on properly despite no tongue tie. It was such hard work, it often felt that I was either pumping or giving DS a bottle with not much time left in between. I didn’t have a hands free pump but used an electric one with those funny bras designed for hands free pumping (more like a strap with two holes to go round the boobs). I gave up because I just couldn’t go on any more. It was starting to affect my mental health. I had a decent supply though and managed to pump and freeze enough for another month.

I completely understand the guilt. You’ve done 5 months though, in my eyes you’re practically a saint, or a superhero