Unsettled crying 10 week old...tried everything

[Jace2804]

Hi,
This is my first post. I am a first time mum and my 10 week old baby boy is so unsettled and seems so restless and uncomfortable.
I have tried everything
Infacol-bunged him up
Gripe water-makes him sick
Aptimel comfort-bunged him up and then when he did go it was like an expolsion, green and smelly and painful for him. He was originally on Aptimel 1 but didn't seem to agree with him so that's why I changed to comfort.
I spoke to my gp on Thursday he has prescribed Aptimel peptide and Colief, he has been on them both since Friday and no change. I am honestly running out of ideas 😭

Ask about CMPA (Cows milk protein allergy)

It can cause gross poo and a unsettled, unhappy baby. You can get prescription milk (neocate or neutramagin) which will help but it takes time to have an effect.

In the short term, does baby have a hair wrapped around a finger or toe?

Also maybe try some skin to skin - get comfy on the soft and rest baby on your bare chest.

Ok thanks will try it. He was born 5 weeks early too by emergency section so was wondering if this could have anything to do with it. He just seems so unhappy all the time I feel like its something wrong im doing...or not doing😔

I second investigating CMPA. Sounds just like my daughter was x

Slow down.

Before you start medicating and whatnot, the most obvious reason for a newborn to be crying is that they are over tired and need to sleep.

Is your baby gaining weight and having wet/dirty nappies?

Is your baby getting enough sleep? It's reasonable that your baby might want no more than an hour or so awake in any one go, and awake windows could be as little as 30 or 40 minutes.

Yes he is a little chunk for 10 weeks old so no worries about that and his wet nappies are no problem, never have been but his dirty nappies messed up when he was on the comfort milk and then went back to normal once I started him on the peptide milk prescribed by the gp but this morning he had a very loose poo and then he hasn't had any poo's again yet today. He is still waking every 3 hours for his feeds, even in the night and he settles in the day for a sleep maybe twice a day and each time for about an hour max? But most of the time if I try settle him to sleep thinking this is the reason for his crying he still is just very unsettled and crying

Is there a reason why you didn’t breastfeed?

I wanted to breast feed but I was in the hospital for 2 weeks after having him and my milk wasn't producing. Me and the midwives tried stimulating my breasts and I tried pumping to stimulate but no luck. The midwives said due to him being early and a section baby this was the reasoning why?

Waking every 3 hours at night is fairly typical for his age .
I’m not quite sure what you mean by uncomfortable, is he actually crying in pain or just moaning ? If moaning , for some babies that is normal .. unfortunately.

One point that jumps out at me is that he has had many changes in his feed in a very short space of time .
He needs time to get used to them , unless severe reaction ..
I don’t think there is an issue with his feed to be honest as he is gaining weight .

His sleeping seems absolutely normal .
He sounds to be doing fine ..?

Are you very tired ? Do you have any support ?

There is a really interesting book called "why they cry: understanding child development in the first year". You can buy it through the evil empire (Amazon) or other outlets. Basically it says that your baby goes through seven major developmental stages during the first year which make it very unsettled. It's a very liberating book. You aren't doing anything wrong. You will come out of this tricky period and move on to another in a few weeks. Completely normal if very exhausting for the parents. Take care of yourself. X

The waking up sounds normal.

Is he screaming In pain or just a bit grumpy?

Two sleeps a day at that age seems far too little? Mines only just gone down to two naps at 8 months. I wonder if a lot of the miserable-ness is due to tiredness? At that age I think my baby needed to sleep every 1.5 hours, though his naps tended to be short.

@Stepstepmother

Is there a reason why you didn’t breastfeed?

Why is this any of your business? The OP sounds like she needs support and not posts that come across as patronising and judgemental.

OP definitely look into the CMPA thing and maybe try a different brand of milk if you're able? I know they're all more or less the same but I've heard anecdotal evidence of brand switching helping bunged up babies.

Have you tried tilting the babies cot? We had a week or so of non stop crying early on and the solution for us was tilting the next to me crib to reduce the reflux issues. We also eventually went only HIPP Anti-Reflux (gaviscon, ranitidine and all the other concoctions didn't seem to do it for us) and used white noise to soothe DD.

Keep hanging in there and keep trying

he settles in the day for a sleep maybe twice a day and each time for about an hour max?...

Two naps of an hour, at 10 weeks old is not (anywhere near) enough daytime sleep. The reason for your baby's crying could well be to do with sleep, not feeding.

As a general approximation, whatever the nap length was then awake window wants to be double. So if you get an hour's nap, you want 2h awake time as a maximum before the next nap. Might even be 90 minutes awake before aslerp for the next nap.

But most of the time if I try settle him to sleep thinking this is the reason for his crying he still is just very unsettled and crying

This is not unusual. It often takes a lot of effort to get baby to sleep. Some very basic things that help baby go to sleep:

● Sucking
Nature's way to sooth baby. This can be comfort sucking at the breast or a dummy. Dummies are also very helpful for reflux.
● Swaddle
The tight, enclosed, secure feeling of the swaddle recreates the feeling of the womb. It also reduces stimulation, makes putting baby down easier
● Movement
You often can't beat the rhythmic bouncing in a bouncer. Or back and forth lulling of the pushchair. Or indeed being rocked or swayed in your arms.

2x 1 hour naps isn't much at all. DS is just 5 months and tend to have 4 naps a day which are 45 min - 2 hours each.

Are you sure they aren't over tired?

Agree on the sleeping. All I remember DD doing for the first three months was sleeping. I even googled whether a baby could sleep too much!

@Stepstepmother

Is there a reason why you didn’t breastfeed?

Is this really what you took away from this post?! For Christ sake no wonder women feel judged for not breastfeeding.

OP to reassure you it’s completely normal for young babies to be unsettled (read about PURPLE crying) and if you’re worried I would go to your GP to discuss. My DC was older when they went on to formula but we had to try a few- cow & gate to aptamil to SMA until we found one they were happy with. SMA do a version for those with a sensitivity to cows milk so you could try that from boots before a GP appointment.

I expect he is v overtired if only sleeping 2 x hour a day! Try putting him down every hour or so he should be sleeping 3/4 naps a day at least really.

And please don’t blame yourself. You aren’t doing anything wrong. Babies are a pain!

The things I found for my DC when overtired- swaddle tightly, dummy, white noise. Worth a try!

Ok thanks I will try persist with the sleeping. Sometimes even if he is asleep hell cry out as if in pain and ill put his dummy back in, sometimes he goes back other times not?. I thought babies are suppose to sleep more as I have a lot of children in the family, but he just seems really restless. I'd love him to sleep more then I'd be able to get some rest in too. I'll try the swaddling

For all the people suggesting cows milk protein intolerance: aptamil pepti is a hydrolysed formula, for treating cows milk protein intolerance. Though it usually takes more than a few days to have much of an effect.

Of course OP it’s not you failing some new babies are v unsettled. The reason swaddling works is it inhibits the startle reflex so they don’t wake themselves up (when not swaddled mine would dither or punch themselves in the face relentless and wake up). If he’s asleep and cries out but settles without the dummy leave him to it. It will get easier I promise.

thankyou, I just feel so s**t at the moment like I'm doing something wrong and I feel iv tried everything, but I will try getting him to sleep more even if it takes me a while to settle him, iv just always thought he musn't be tired if iv tried and he's kicked off

I completely understand I’ve been there and you take it to heart and see it as a reflection on you and your parenting. Do you have DH/DP who can help you? Perhaps try getting him to nap in a sling?

My mum helps me as much as she can but she works nights and my cousin/friends all have young children of their own so they try to help as much as they can but I don't want to put my problems on them when they have their own families to deal with

My mother in law say he is 'needy' because he is picked up too much but I thought you couldnt spoil a new baby by picking them up when they cry?🤷‍♀️

sorry for the confusion it is still me (jace2804)just a name change 👍