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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Hate breastfeeding so much

26 replies

Coldest · 17/06/2016 16:41

My DD2 is 2 weeks old. I breast my elder one to 2 years but it was a miserable 2 years. I hated breastfeeding but she refused bottle. DD2 I wanted to mix feed from start but talked out if it by OH. We have had no problems with breastfeeding on the face of it. But I hate it. I find it so restrictive. I can't leave baby even for half an hour to go for a walk or go to an appointment. I tried her with bottle but she refused. I am so unhappy now. Also feel guilty and depressed about it. I hardly get any sleep. As soon as I go to bed she starts fussing and want a fees. I gave her to my OH today so I could catch some sleep and he brought her to mW within 15 min as she got hysterical and wanted a feed. Am so exhausted and fed up

OP posts:
CopperPot · 17/06/2016 16:51

Yep it's bloody hard and mentally draining.

Mine is nearly 6 months and I've had enough so she'll be moving onto formula once back from holiday.

It is convenient at night times and going out but the never being able to leave them and have some time away is killing me and not making me a great mum. She's mix fed at the moment - I gave her a bottle early on so that she would not refuse them when older.

I can't express for any money either so that's not an option.

CopperPot · 17/06/2016 16:51

Night times are awful too. Mine wants to suckle for comfort all night. I hate it

Fairylea · 17/06/2016 16:56

Keep trying with the bottle and try different ones. Your dh may have more luck as the baby won't be able to smell your milk at the same time.

Don't breastfeed if you don't want to. Honestly if you're hating it then it really isn't worth it. I would keep persevering to switch to bottle feeding.

Coldest · 17/06/2016 16:59

I have enough for expressing but she doesnt take the bottle at all. I didn't leave my first one along ever till she was 14 months and I can't do the same again. I will persevere with the bottle. I thought 2 weeks was early and that she would take to the bottle but no such luck.

OP posts:
PeppasNanna · 17/06/2016 17:07

Seriously as a mum of 6, as a mum that ff/bf & mixed fed. STOP!

If its making you that unhappy, its not benefiting your baby.

Im sorry but your OH hasn't breasts so he doesn't get to say if you bf.

justpeachy74 · 17/06/2016 17:16

I agree. If it's making you so unhappy this early on and you already have experience of the road ahead do persevere with the bottle. Good luck.

RumAppleGinger · 17/06/2016 17:20

Just coming to echo others. It's just not worth sacrificing your happiness over. Try out a few different bottle shapes and get your DH to feed her.

Chippednailvarnishing · 17/06/2016 17:22

Do what suits you, I found my DS liked the MAM bottles with the flat teat if that's any help...

Stellars · 18/06/2016 08:21

Try Nuk latex teats. The only teat my bottle-refuser will entertain.

OneEpisode · 18/06/2016 08:25

I ebf'd but dh could settle the baby.i got a break. Why is your OH so keen on ebf? Is it so he doesn't have to "do the baby"?

Jelliedeels · 18/06/2016 08:29

Formula is not poison.

It can be restrictive. Also if your not a happy mummy you can have a unhappy baby.

You need to make your life as simple as you can.

Mine girl is 1 year she has been formula fed 11 out of 12 months. Due to allergies.

But OMG my life with her changed dramatically when I stopped breast feeding.

Do what's right for you.

And like I opened with formular is NOT poison

Coldest · 18/06/2016 15:52

Thanks everyone for the support. I have tried thr NUK bottle but she wont take it. I am going to try the MAM next. I do want to formula feed. I wish I had not delayed it.

OP posts:
ElspethFlashman · 18/06/2016 15:59

At 2 weeks she'll take a bottle eventually so keep persevering! Make sure it's a decent flow teat as they don't want to work too hard.

I had to put my first onto bottles at 2 weeks old as I had an event I had to be away all day for. It took me about three days of coaxing before we were satisfied that he'd be OK if I wasn't there.

Best thing I ever did by the way.

Waterlemon · 18/06/2016 16:00

Just what everyone else - do what you need to do!

You may need to investigate the flow of the bottle teats and not the brand as such. The ones you've tried could be too slow or too fast!

ijustwannadance · 18/06/2016 16:07

I know people love them or hate them on MN but could you try a dummy too? If you have a sucky baby who isn't necessarily hungry it might give you more chance to rest. I hated BF too. Had to stop for my own sanity.

flumpybear · 18/06/2016 16:20

I agree with others, don't make yourself unhappy!! Have you tried going out so your baby can't smell you, leave DH with her to persevere with the bottle feeding!? Good luck!

CopperPot · 18/06/2016 19:14

Try the tommee tippee closer to nature

CopperPot · 18/06/2016 19:15

Only way my dd would take it first time was bouncing her on bed quite a lot while persevering and making sure she wasn't over hungru or over tired

sycamore54321 · 18/06/2016 20:23

I'd be genuinely worried about the level of control your husband has over your body. Choosing how you use your breasts must be your iwn decision - if you hate BF, then don't do it. Your description of his behaviour is controlling and worrying.

WatchMeSoar · 18/06/2016 20:35

If you hate BF then stop, don't beat yourself up about it.
Its your decision no one else's.
I found disposable bottles a godsend, the teats are so soft they were the only bottles mine would take when I took them off the breast.

Coldest · 18/06/2016 20:52

Watchmesoar where can I get those?
Can you link please?

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idontlikealdi · 18/06/2016 21:31

Christ if you want to stop pleas stop. Mine were never BF but prem twins who had been tube fed and we couldn't get them to take a bottle. In the end the really crappy four bottles for a £ were recommended by SCBU because the hole is big enough and it worked, we then weaned them on to proper avent bottles. Good luck.

Wizzles · 18/06/2016 21:41

You can get the disposable bottles in the supermarket.

www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=283468059

We started giving DD them as a top-up cos she wasn't BFing properly & not gaining weight. She now takes normal tommie tipped ones. She wouldn't take it from me to start with though so DH had to do it which was an interesting role reversal!

We have since stopped the topups and I EBF now but I express so DH can feed her. I know I'm really lucky that she'll take the bottle as I hate BFing too.

Your DD is only tiny, so you never know, she may learn to take bottles.

Good luck OP. I hate it too, but it got easier.

HoldOnHoldOn · 18/06/2016 21:43

Agree with everyone else. Would echo the point about teats- get a number 2/ medium flow, too slow a teat means baby had to work too hard and gets frustrated. Good luck

ElmTree22 · 18/11/2022 04:40

Another early morning desperation post.
Guys