jars and sachets - MIL is disgusted

[Murphyslaw21]

Bit of a back story...

My house we bought before baby is very old, found out I was pregnant so did bedrooms, and living room. We have no heating or water, having run out of money we have had to put kitchen old hold.

House is warmed by a wood burner. Now my kitchen is disgusting. Mould, damp no water (outside tap only). We only use it as necessary. Pots and pans are washed in bucket with kettle water. Therefore I only give baby jars and sachets. Now I spend a fortune she has mango breakfast, porridge, roast dinners all fruit and veg. I wash her pots and sterilise them. I would not think of risking cooking as I'm not convinced pots and utensils are clean enough. We won't be doing kitchen until next year as we have to put in heating in this year. We don't have a dishwasher as no space for one.

My MIL has raised concerns and insults that it's because I can't be bothered to cook and that the jars are full of preservatives and additives. But I read them and they are 100% organic with nothing added. I'm so cross.

I give baby 3 good meals a day. I would love to cook but it's an awful kitchen. When we go out with her and I pull out a packet I get rolling eyes and sarcastic comments. The other day I said well buy me a kitchen then. And she moaned that I spent the money on doing bedrooms first. But my logic was baby needs a nice clean bedroom . We had been sleeping for six months on an air bed. Not fun whilst heavily pregnant.

I'm so angry but I'm wondering if the jars and sachets are bad.

Oohmavis

I'm cross because of the horrible comments they have made me feel terrible. Making out she is living in squalid conditions and neglected. I'm so upset

I wish I could comment to everyone with their helpful ideas.

Slow cooker, microwave steamer and two ring burner are good ideas and on shopping list.

My baby is loved more than anyone in my world she is spoilt and content . She has a beautiful room with carpet to play and dribble on rather than mouldy floor boards. She is my world and the people that write such nasty comments are just nasty not supportive . It's not ideal of course not I would love to be living in a beautiful house with kitchen bedrooms and bathroom all done. But I'm not so I'm making a bad situation as good as I can .

Sometimes I really think I should not of asked as some of you are really fucking nasty

With the best will in the world - calm the fuck down.

Lots of people (myself included) have taken the time to write lengthy and helpful replies.

You asked a question and you don't like the answer. But why not instead look at your situation as outsiders are, and try to think of how you could improve things?

Don't get ring burner, get the electric hob version. See my post just above yours. We posted at the same time so you might not see it.

Now my kitchen is disgusting. Mould, damp no water

You would not want to eat food prepared in our kitchen. The shed is cleaner and that's not a joke.

This is what you said in your OP. Imagine if you were reading it as an outsider? Loads of people have given you really helpful advice, but you can see why some may think that it's not really adequate at the moment.

OP I feel for you, I moved house with 7 month old ds and fed him just pouches for a month or more because it took that long to get the kitchen in a suitable state for cooking. Dh and I had microwave meals. I do not look back on that time fondly and really feel for you knowing you have a while to go before you get your kitchen!
My (helpful) dm gave me ideas of no-prep foods - all mentioned already, avocado, banana, soft fruit like pears all mashed with a fork. Ds also ate yoghurts and bread, though I am not sure if you have a fridge for the yoghurt. If I remember right at that age (7m?) it's mostly about getting used to different tastes and ds didn't really eat proper 'meals' till around 10m. He is a pretty good eater (for a toddler!) so I don't think his month of pouches diet did him any harm. He still has them occasionally as a smoothie (or on a day when he has hardly eaten anything and I want to get something in him!)
So, no I don't think they are that bad! But I've also read the thread and there are some good ideas there that may help you with both yours and you dd's meals in the future. Good luck!

Do you have a freezer? I defrost peas and sweetcorn etc by boiling some water and just pouring it over frozen veg. Omelettes are also really easy to cook even on a makeshift hob, just add some diced pepper and onion and a little cheese on top. Cereal or porridge is easy for breakfast. I think you can do 'real' food without much in the way of facilities. It as much about experience and texture as it is nutrition so I'd really strive to move away from jars for every meal personally.

I don't tbobk you have to live in a beautiful house though, but you do need it to be adequate & with no kitchen etc, it's clearly not.

As advised, porridge in a microwave & a slower cooker will at least tide you over.

We're just going to pull you apart and question your parenting but whatever you do just be grateful and don't get defensive

Why jesabel
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We're just going to pull you apart and question your parenting but whatever you do just be grateful and don't get defensiv**
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Why not give helpful ideas ? As manny have

I think jesabel was defending you actually saying of course you will get defensive with lots of people pulling apart your parenting!

slow cooker is a very good idea. it will be fine, children are raised in worse conditions all over the world.

If you've got the space, why not just buy a full sized electric cooker rather than microwave/hob/slow cooker/mini oven? Then you could move it to the permanent kitchen when the time comes. It sounds like it will be a while.

It's fine. Baby will be fine, lots of people use jars they're not poison and at 7 months most nutrition comes from their milk anyway.
DS had only jars for a while because I was in temporary accommodation which was a shared house with a disgusting kitchen, mould everywhere, mouldy food in fridge and as the people I were sharing with were 2 men who'd just got out of prison I was scared to leave my room if it wasn't necessary anyway.
DS is now a heathy happy 2 year old who eats lots of fruit and vegetables and will happily eat a variety of food.
Things other than jars that I used to use that may be usefull-
Scrambled eggs in microwave
Fruit
Cucumber slices and tomatoes from salad bags
Advocado is an easy one that babies love just mash with a fork
Get those individual bags of prepared veg that you can stick in the microwave, you can get bags of butternut squash and sweet potato too which are good microwaved.
Breadsticks/carrot sticks and hummous, you can get it in little pots in the sandwich section of shops.

What is the set up of the downstairs, you have mentioned the living room being done and that the kitchen is basically outside, what other rooms do you have downstairs for example is there a dining room or a study that haven't as yet been done that you could clean up and take over as a temporary kitchen. If you can then have a look round and see if you can find a cheap welsh dresser, you can use it to prepare food on, store things in and they will cope with a really good scrub. Dishwasher? could you put one in the garage with the washing machine, you can get splitters to connect two appliances to one water supply and drain. Not as convenient I'll admit but if need be you could probably set up a basic kitchen in the garage, add a playpen in that case to keep your baby safe while you cook. Fridge freezer again you can put one in the garage for now.

Op - so what do you have to cook currently? Do you have. A microwave and kettle? Do you have a fridge? If not get a small fridge and stand microwave on it

My recommendation wouldn't be a hob but a George Forman grill in machine -£20. You can literally grill all meat/ fish and various veg in it in about 5 mins. With anything from microwave if needed.
Ie some fresh salmon, baby corn both in grill. Serve with fresh bread.

There are lots of options you can feed baby without jars all the time. It will be better for her and you and save you all money.

Easiest option would be to give a ready meal jar to her in evening, and make the other meals. So breakfast just give her plain Greek yogurt and fruit, or some toast, or can make porridge or scrambled egg in microwave.
At lunch can do cold raw veg and fruit, with bread/ cheese/ pre cooked chicken/ avocado etc. If you get a George Forman grill mentioned and you have fridge you can grill a little extra in evening and put leftovers in the fridge for her lunch.

If your buying ready prepped stuff your better off looking at the pre prepped microwave veg and ready steamed fish for example. But will be cheaper to just buy some spinach/ baby corn and cucumber and give to her raw

The thing with jars is as she grows she will need 4-6 a day minimum which will be about £40 -60 a week alone if organic. Also not great for chewing development.

To all the posters talking about saving instead of buying expensive jars- a few pounds on jars is hardly going to contribute much to a £15k kitchen extension is it?!

Op I'm sure you've thought of it but can you take out a loan? I'd be doing whatever to get this stuff done because it sounds terrible.

You've had some great advice about a temporary kitchen I can't really add to but just wanted to say re your MIL- I suspect she's upset about the whole living arrangement rather than just the jars. Maybe worth a chat saying unless you can offer practical help or suggestions there is nothing you can do. The bedrooms are done now.

Walking - well it does help. £60 a week on baby jars v £10 on extra regular food ( as eating same as them). That's £200 saving a month, £2400 in one year. Surely that £2000+ will go a long way to making kitchen at least mould free and clean new walls even if not fitted yet

Full sized electric cooker needs proper heavy duty electrics, so a smaller one is probably a more practical choice.

I'd agree OP that a 2 ring electric hob would be much safer than a gas camping stove. Especially once your little one is on the move.

Might be worth a browse of camping blogs/sites/fab groups? We keep our camping gear fairly minimal but there are plenty of people who really go to town and cook huge feasts. There's all sorts of innovative kit out there. Might be good for ideas?

The person who said baby food is full of preservatives because it lasts is full of crap. It lasts in an airtight container. Once the seals broken you have to refrigerate it and use in a couple of days.

Hi Op, just wanted to say that Aldi have a special on starting the 7th which includes an electric omelette maker, George foreman grill, air fryer, juicer and smoothie maker if that helps you. Also microwave casserole dishes and proper food storage containers.

Nothing wrong with the odd jar or pouch, but not good as a long term solution. There's plenty you can cook with just a microwave that would be suitable. My DC used to love sweet potato, I would microwave whole for 5 mins and then scoop out the inside.

Fish is easily cooked in the microwave and I'm sure I have seen recipes for microwave risotto.

microwave recipes here

There's also avocado and banana that don't need any preparation apart from mashing.

Artandco. It's works out £20 a week.

Asda and tesco alternate offers eg 12 jars for £5 and Elle's kitchen 6 pouches for £5 plus I get the biscuits etc

Thanks gastonpompom will be going next week

I'm one of the people who said don't get defensive, and by that I meant for the OP's sake - it is a waste of time and energy to get bogged down in thinking to yourself 'well I didn't mean that' or 'why are they being so mean' when there are also LOADs of good ideas here too.

Mini-kitchen type of thing in the living room, (even if it's a very small table next to one electrical outlet) is a good idea and a great starting point for loads of meals.