Breastfeeding at 3 days old

[Gyarr]

Hi everyone. New dad here looking for advice to help an exhausted wife and newborn baby.

Our baby just seems to cry - constantly. I mean she will take an hour to settle down and then start crying again after 10 minutes. She's being changed and being kept warm the only thing is the feeding?

When my wife begins to feed her she settles but only suckles for 2-3mins before falling asleep. Then we go to move her and the crying kicks off again. Neither my wife nor baby have had much sleep since she was born and as you can imagine it's very distressing for my wife and I just want to help her.

I'm writing this now at 3am as both sleep in bed beside me whilst I keep watch.

It makes me sooo cross to hear that as we were told by some midwives to feed every 3 hours so used to time her and if she cried half an hour say after feed id tell husband to rock or play with her as she couldn't possibly be hungry poor thing was starving! Another midwife said to feed 8 times in24 hrs so I a gain timed. I feel so stupid as I should've just fed constantly she needed feeding every 15 mins when I think back now. My advice is don't put your trust in the so called experts you know what's best, trust yourself
It just makes me soooo angry that nhs are pushing and pressuring women to breastfeed but not giving them the correct advice. The advice should be to feed feed feed. The phrase feeding on demand is stupid as that assumes mums know that their babies are hungry when you're a first time mum exhausted you haven't got a clue what to do and believe the experts. The feeding counselor at hospital told me I had misinterpreted the midwives as I was too tired. Patronising woman, funny how my husband heard the same things and he wasn't as tired. Support for breastfeeding needs to change for women the best support I had was a breastfeeding volunteer lady with nct. She gave me all options which nhs hadn't done.
If I have another baby I will ignore the so called experts and do things my own way

Why aren't you sleeping while mum and baby are sleeping OP?

Pretty much all a newborn wants is either to be fed, or to be held. Sometimes they refuse to be put down. At all. In which case, IME co-sleeping is the only way to stop you both going mad with sleep deprivation. You can google how to do it as safely as possible.

And it is impossible to over estimate how many feeds a tiny baby can apparently need a day - and as it's impossible to spoil them, you just need to go with it.

Agree with others that the Kelly Mom website is great - evidence-based, full of useful information.

As above they feed a lot during newborn to establish mummies milk supply. I Remember the first maybe 8 weeks was just constantly feeding day and night. Just follow your lo's lead with whatever they want they are little superstars and know what they are doing. The more the feed the more milk mummy produces as tiring as it sounds. Night times are a killer because that's when they will need to feed to produce milk for the next day it's like a supply and demand service. After maybe 2-3 months things settle down drastically my lo feeds every three hours now and sleeps threw (7month)

You after remember mummy as also be baking baby for 9 months so baby will feel safe near mummy so keep them close together and let baby feed as often as he/she needs to. Ask your wife to sleep with a blanket for a couple of days then give it to your lo as a comforter because it will have her smell on.

Get plenty of sacks preferably anything oaty like flapjack because it's brilliant for producing milk. Lots and lots of water as well.

They can smell mummies milk and that's what they want to be near because they feel safe.

She's doing an amazing job and it does get easier. Feeding baby every 3-4 hours at this ages is not good for breast fed babies will explain why she cries a lot, feeding little and often x

Google the 4th trimester. Not wanting to be put into the Moses basket is completely normal (my first wouldn't but my second would). If she wakes up when she's put down co sleeping safely is best for everyone.

I agree that for the first 8 weeks hold and feed on demand, do what works and what is easiest. You might find your new born has a rhythm but certainly no routine. They are agents of chaos! I really recommend infacol. My lo held onto wind for hours and this worked a treat. Now she is 12 weeks old and is now 2.5 to 3.5 hours between feeds. I think from 8 weeks on she started to settle into a pattern roughly feeds for 30m, plays for 30m, cuddles for 30m, sleeps 30m. Now of course she is having a growth spurt and all is up in the air.