Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Honest opinions please should I stop bf 8 month old DD due to weight?

45 replies

Lucy1977 · 03/10/2006 22:11

Ok, sorry for such dramatic subject title but I feel that everyone is on my back at the moment.

DD is 8 months old next week and after such a rocky start we finally got the hang of bf and both of us really enjoy it. She weighed 17lbs and half an ounce on Tuesday and the health visitor said she thought I should switch to formula now because she weighted 16lbs 5oz 3 wks ago. Then today I used the gym's creche for the 1st time and left DD there for 40 mins, I gave DD a quick bf in a corner of the room when I picked her up and there were only the two women who run it, 3 small children and a woman collecting her baby (who is also a breastfeeder). The woman (who runs it ) said to me "that makes my toes curl seeing you do that" (I'm not sure what she meant but I was too embarrassed to ask so gave her benefit of doubt thinking she must've found it painful) then she said "well when you've got a healthy child like x (son of my friend who is a heavy bf baby) you can see how his mum's milk is best for him but when you see y (my DD) you.. well she must just be a different build".

Arrgghhh I thought we were doing so well. DD's just started sleeping much better at night and taking solids well.

Do you think I should forget how long I wanted to bf for and put her on formula? Am I being selfish bf her now?

THanks

OP posts:
TheBlonde · 03/10/2006 22:13

Ignore them
If you want to bf carry on

hairymclary · 03/10/2006 22:17

you're doing fine. Hard as it is, just ignore thepeople who tell you otherwise.
your baby is putting on weight and is happy and healthy so what's the problem?
If she had suddenly started losing a lot of weight then i might be worried, but not if she just hasn't put on as much as your HV thinks she ought to have.

Daisymoo · 03/10/2006 22:20

Ignore both of them. It is entirely normal for weight gain to slow down at this age as they become more active. Weighing is optional, you don't have to go, especially if it's knocking your confidence

Piffle · 03/10/2006 22:21

ignore them
I have bf two kids
One on the 96th centile one low low on the 0.4 centile
Different builds, different needs, different appetites. Your body makes milk especially for your baby - it knows what is best for your dd
Adn the hv is talking through a hole in her arse and should know better.
You're doing great, please yourself honey, no one else

EnormousChangesAtTheLastMinute · 03/10/2006 22:26

imo the creche woman was rude, insensivitve and intrusive and you should take no notice of her! if you are worried about your dd's weight, talk to someone about your concerns - better still talk to a range of people (it seems everyone has an agenda when it comes to bf!?) and make your own decision, based on what's best for you and your dd, in your own time. at 8 months surely weight gain isn't as simple as breast milk as babies are on solids too..? i'm no expert but just wanted to say 'chin up' and please take no notice of an off the cuff remark by a stranger.
by the way, your're doing better than me if your dd will tolerate the creche at the gym... i didn't get chance to order a carrot juice before they came looking for me... good luck!

misdee · 03/10/2006 22:38

at 8months old, my dd3 weighed the same as your dd. at 18months old she weighs just over 22lb. full breastfed, stil b/f at least once a day.

chipmonkey · 03/10/2006 23:11

Lucy, I'm so at the HV and the silly creche woman. All babies are different and your dd may not be huge but you can bet that your milk is doing her the world of good. Heavier is not necessarily healthier. I am still bfing ds3 who is 21 months and he's not the heaviest child but he is rarely ill and goes to a creche where he is mixing with other children on a daily basis. Thinking back, I stopped bf ds1 and ds2 when they were around 12 months and both of them were always coming down with tummy bugs. Keep bf for as long as you and your dd want.

justamum · 03/10/2006 23:30

Lucy1977, i have dd's red book in front of me and am looking at the weight charts. 17lb is 7.70kg which is actually between the 2nd and 9th centiles at almost 12 months so your dd is absolutely fine. No need to listen to any one talking rubbish, my hv said a similar thing about my dd when she only put on 3oz in 3 weeks. BF babies are often leaner , my dd has chubby legs but is slim round the middle and is very active and strong (she is just crawling and is not yet 6mnths). Isn't the general rule of thumb that they double their birthweight by 4mnths and triple it by 12months so weight gain does slow down. I just look at my active, beautiful dd and think there is absolutely nothing wrong with that child, I bet you could say the same.

Original poster
Lucy1977 · 04/10/2006 13:56

Thanks for your support ladies.

I think I was having a bit of a panic last night. Wasn't sure if I was just bfing for selfish reasons rather than the health of DD but really when you read about how good the milk is for them it makes me wonder why the HV would say something like that. I went to the BF help group today and the HV mad me really angry! I asked if there wasn't anything I could do to help my supply (I know to feed DD often to increase but wondered if I could improve quality?) and the HV just said if I'm not adverse to giving her formula I should do that and use a cup!? I really have learnt my lesson and I'm not going to the clinic ever again. DD has 8 month check on Monday and then that'll be it.

Yes, DD is very active, she's been crawling for about a month now and zooms all over the house. She's got a nice shape, not skinny but not fat.

Thanks again,

Lucy
p.s Justamum - interesting what you say about the centiles because I'm in Scotland and we don't have red books where I am so I've never known what centile she was on or if she'd dropped/gained etc.

OP posts:
throckenholt · 04/10/2006 14:03

steer clear of the clinic and the HV.

Breast fed your baby in the normal way. It really is what they are designed to drink - how can formula possibly be a better option (formula is a good option when you have no choice - but if you can BF it has to be better).

Trust yourself and your body - and your baby - she will grow the way her needs to and there is not a lot you can do about it - apart from making sure she gets the opportunity to have healthy food.

vitomum · 04/10/2006 14:10

THis again reinforces to me that i am the only MNetter that had a sane HV. Just checked my red book and ds was 15lb9oz at 7 months. his weight gain was 1-2oz a week at that point and had been for several weeks - and actually he was on formula from 6 months (my choice) but it made no difference to his weight gain! Luckily for me my HV never pressurised me about it.

bluejelly · 04/10/2006 14:17

Carry on, you sound like you are doing great

doggiesayswoof · 04/10/2006 14:39

Stick with it if you want to - and don't worry about the 'quality' of your milk - I'm sure I've read that this is only an issue in very malnourished women. Your hv's answer is very revealing isn't it? It sounds like she is only up for giving advice on one subject i.e. how NOT to bf.

tiktok · 04/10/2006 14:40

Lucy - you don't need to improve the quality of your breastmilk. Breastmilk quality is pretty consistent no matter what a mother does/eats/drinks

(barring poisons or street drugs or some powerful medications).

Wouldn't you think an HV would know that, instead of trotting out a formula plug?

doggiesayswoof · 04/10/2006 14:42

Also think the creche lady was just so, so rude - all she's doing is airing her own prejudices IMO.
Where are you in Scotland? Just interested because I'm in Glasgow and we have the red books here (mine was the bane of my life when dd was low on the centiles!)

Original poster
Lucy1977 · 04/10/2006 17:19

DW - we're in South Lanarkshire

TT - yeah how bizarre that it was actually at the BF support group that she was talking about formula! I should've have bothered going just thought that as it was the BF S G that's where I'd get help/advice! THink I might go along to the local La Leche mtg if I need support in the future

Thanks
Lucy

OP posts:
jetgirl · 05/10/2006 12:26

Lucy1977, I'm going to say what others have said, but it's always good to know people are on your side! keep going with what ou feel is right. My dd was 15lb 12 at 8 months, still bf now and she's 13 and a half months weighing 18lb 11oz. Fortunately hv has never queried my decision to keep bf even tho dd is little, she is obviously healthy and very active. She enjoys her food too.
Ignore the stupid people who make such negative and unhelpful comments and do what you want to for your little one.

sweetkitty · 05/10/2006 12:37

hi Lucy I'm BFing DD2 at 8 months too. I'm in North Lanarkshire and for DD2 I got a useless card thing with no centiles on it either (must be cutbacks) not that I've had DD2 weighed since she was 4 months. If you saw her you would know why she's solid, not fat just long and well built. I BF DD1 the same for a year and she's a little tiny thing, probably just below the 9th centile throughout her first year and her weight has stayed the same for a while now 22lbs at 2 years. Both completely different babies with different appetites.

I hate all the HVs I have come into contact with so avoid them unless I really cannot avoid it, they all say different things and have different opinions anyway. I also know what you mean about BFing in Scotland, where I am hardly anyone BFs and when I am BFing DD2 nearly everyone has to come and tell me a story as to why BFing failed for them (like a care I'm only trying to give DD2 a quick feed).

Keep going as long as you and your DD want to, ignore everyone else, your doing a great job.

sweetkitty · 05/10/2006 12:39

And why do people (and HVs) think that formula is so magic that it is so much better than breastmilk at putting weight on babies when it is not?

I get so that anytime theres anything wrong with a BF baby (not sleeping, nappy rash, gaining weight/not gaining weight, anything) what will fix it is to give formula

3andnomore · 05/10/2006 14:01

Awwww, grrrrrrr for you!
Your dd is healthy she is growing and that is all that is important....your HV doesn't seem to be to well informed, sigh...and as for that woman at the creche...grrrrr, silly cow!
I bf'ed all mine (although es only for 4 monthish)...es and ys are heavy lil lumps and put on weight really quickly as baby's and were chubby Baby's/Toddler 9even though es was my lightest Baby at Birth and ys was my heaviest, lol)
Ms was weightwise bang in the middle of teh other 2, but he is just so petitely build...but that is just the way he always was and is...he is a bundle of energy, lol...so, he probably burns calories megafast because of that!
Anyways, don't worry about other people, do what you feel is right, especially as you seem to be doing well

hotmama · 05/10/2006 14:48

Lucy - my dd2 is also 8 months next week - got her weighed today and she is 17.7 - so very similar to your lo. She is between the 25th and 50th centiles - nearer the 50th. DD2 is also a "moverabouter" and a long girl but has some rolls on her legs. Ignore crap comments and carry on bf your lo - for as long as you like.

FWIW - I found the support of La Leche invaluable this time around - hence I am still bf dd2 but gave up bf dd1 at 10 weeks - I found good support really makes a difference.

yellowrose · 05/10/2006 15:49

Lucy - please remind your stupid HV that human infants are NOT meant to look FAT, if they do look fat, than they are clearly overweight.

My son weighed 3.09 kilos at birth, but because he is quite short (on 25th centile for weight and height) he looked quite podgy until he was about 5.5 months. His weight gain gradually tapered off after 6 months and even more so once he was on solids (this is normal).

I remember having to wait well past his one year birthday to switch over to a larger car seat as it seemed ages before he reached 9 kilos. I think he finally reached 9 kilos at 14 months !

He is stil bf at 2.3 years and looks shorter than most others his age, but doesn't look skinny unless he is totally naked and then you can see that he has very little fat on him ! But that is because he has never been overfed, was exclusivley bf for the first 6 months and although he loves food he is not a big eater. That is how it should be. Baby stomachs are not built for overfeeding.

If you are really really worried (doesn't sound like you sould be as you baby is active and healthy which is what counts) then please speak to La Leche League or any other bf professional. HV's and GP's know sweet f a about bf babies, believe me, I talk from bitter experience !

Good luck

louii · 05/10/2006 15:58

Breastfed babies are meant to be lean, ignore stupid health visitor.
My DS was also about that weight at that age, in fact lighter I think and nothing was ever mentioned to me.
Keep doing what you are doing and dont go back to the (lack of) breastfeeding support group!

Olihan · 05/10/2006 16:09

Lucy, just to give you a bit more reassurance, my dd was formula fed from 9 weeks (thanks to crap HV) and by 7 months was 19lbs 5 oz. At her 8 month check 5 weeks later she was 20lbs 1 oz. So she put on the same amount of weight as your dd but over 5 weeks, not 3. Surprisingly as she is FF not a single comment was made.

Steer clear of the HV and the clinic after she has her 8 month check and stick to what you WANT to do.

Olihan · 05/10/2006 16:13

Pupuce (one of the bf gurus on MN linked to this on another thread. It's the centile charts from the WHO that are based on bf babies. That might reassure you a bit more too.